How have your children got up to 'monkey business'? Share with Ape for the chance to win a £300 voucher

[LucyBMumsnet]

This sponsored discussion is now closed. Thank you to everyone who posted their stories below."

Children often choose their moments wisely and cause mischief as soon as you turn your back. It’s only once they’ve already buttered the carpet or themselves head-to-toe in Sudocrem that you realise they’re up to monkey business. Ape have cut the monkey business - making snacks with plant based ingredients and natural flavours - and would like to hear the stories of the times your children have got up to mischief.

Here’s what Ape has to say: “We know there are times when your kids have caused a little chaos. However, you have to admit that their antics make for great entertainment. They’re the moments that turn into memories which you look back at and laugh about. Ape snacks contain no monkey business, but we do want to hear about the good kind of monkey business your cheeky children get up to.

Perhaps they gave themselves a haircut or decided to decorate the house with streams of precious loo roll? Maybe you caught them red-handed stealing from the snacks cupboard? (We don’t blame them when there are tasty treats around!). Whatever the monkey business is, we can’t wait to hear what stories you have to share!”

What’s the most mischievous thing your child has done? Perhaps they used felt tips to draw on brilliant white walls or tucked into your birthday cake when no one was looking? How did you cope with the situation? Did it require a big clean up job or was there a lot of explaining that needed to be done? Is it something you laugh about in hindsight?

Whatever mayhem your child has caused, let us know on the thread below and you will be entered into a prize draw where one lucky Mumsnetter will win a £300 voucher for a store of their choice (from a list).

Thanks and good luck!
MNHQ

Standard Insight T&Cs apply

Ds decided to scrape his name into several of our freshly painted stairs!! I was not home at the time, his father was looking after him!!

Week 1 of lockdown.
DD2 aged 2 is helping me hang the washing out. Picks up a pair of boxers from the pile and runs into the living room where DH is on a video conference call waving them aloft shouting “daddy, your pants”......!!!!

DD1 and DD2 playing very quietly upstairs. Suspicious. Both came down and bolted for the garden. As I followed them outside, I realised that DD1s waist length blonde hair was GONE, as well as her fringe. DD2 had been playing 'hairdressers' and kindly given her older sister a lovely trim. I screamed.
Not my proudest moment but it was a shock.
In addition, it was DD1s first day in Primary two the next day. We had to scramble round for a late night hairdresser to salvage what was left, and used huge wide hairbands to hide the missing fringe. The school photo a few days later is a lovely reminder of the haircut! I was finding blonde hair around the house for months!

My DS1 was in the car with his dad. DH got out to make a business phone call.
DS1 discovered a way to amuse himself by making lots of lovely circle patterns on the dashboard by melting it with the cigarette lighter.
DH not too pleased!

I left toddler painting to answer the door, came back to baby doll painted head to toe in blood red paint.

My youngest son practically redecorated our bedroom with one bottle of opi nail varnish, covered himself, the wardrobe the windowsill the curtains the duvet and the cats claws..... you could never imagine how much disaster one bottle could cause!!.
Clean up involved nail varnish remover,shaving foam,washing liquid,pan scrubbers,vim,toothpaste,hairspray so much so you couldn’t light a match in the house for about 6 weeks for fear of combustion.

Said child is now 19 and there’s still bits on the rug ( nail varnish not child)

My middle son was in trouble and he knew it.... he was sent to his room for the foreseeable (it involves a BB gun and his younger brother) in preparation for him being sent to his room, he’d already unbeknown to us taken snacks into his room and hidden them.
The next day when the shooting incident was forgotten by the majority of the family although youngest still bears a grudge ...... he went off to school and I carried on with my day - on entering his bedroom a most horrendous smell hit me -his bed next to the radiator (which was on) seemed to be the cause - a congealed melted slimey pepperami style thing was slowly melting under there - the spices stench and sheer gloop of it was rank and the stain never did come out of the bedding ...... some weeks later I found half a 3 week old corned beef sandwich in same sons bedroom that was rank too but not at the same level.

I had carefully put out the weighed amounts ready for making a cake in little bowls (like on the telly)
Nipped to the loo and 2 year old decided to 'help' kitchen was covered within minutes!

This happened almost two years ago. DH was at home one day with both children all day (they were one and a half at the time). I got home that day at half four to find out that there were lots of breadcrumbs on the floor of the kitchen. Also they had ‘helpfully’ drawn on the kitchen floor with some crayons. He had no idea what had happened until lunchtime when he saw the floor. They were left to their own devices that morning.
Turns out, my partner thought it was a lovely idea to give them some crayons and a toast each for lunch which promptly turned chaotic. Cue me frantically mopping up and refusing to let anyone else help me that afternoon. The next morning, I decided to introduce a new rule regarding art.

My son used to have a habit of putting random objects down the toilet 🙄

When I was 20 I took my then 3 year old niece out for a McDonald's and to chose something for Mother's Day. We popped into a clothes shop and I was looking at a pair of trousers for work and she decided to play hide and seek and hid in the middle of the clothes.

She sat very quietly for almost 10 minutes while the shop staff and I searched for her, having locked doors and refusing to let people in it out. When the nice policeman arrived she kept out and shouted boo. I win.

I didn't take her out for a very long time after that.

We were visiting car dealerships looking for a new car with a 9 and 5 year old in tow. One place had a children's play area inside complete with crafts, jigsaws, puzzles and a couple of huge colourful beanbags to lounge in.
We were looking at cars whilst keeping an eye on our two girls (or so we thought). After a few minutes we heard hysterical laughter and looked back to see our girls had emptied the contents of the beanbags all over the place. The sales assistant was confused; he was angry at our children, rightly so, but didn't want to lose a potential sale so tried to laugh it off as we all spent 45 mins scooping up the tiny polystyrene balls back in to the bags.
We obviously apologised profusely and in the end we did buy a car from that dealership although not on that particular visit.

Decorated her favourite dolly in red pen is about the worse. Both of my DC hate messy things so it's more difficult to get them to make a mess than it is to find them making one off their own backs.

Boredom set in after 8 days of this lockdown and dd decided to cut her hair. It looks a mess, and I can't fix it for love nor money...

My daughter decided she wanted cake for breakfast and gave plenty to the floor and kitchen sides too.

Oh so many to choose from but the one we still laugh about is eldest DD aged 5 who denied it was her that wrote her name on the side of the (new) leather sofa in felt tip pen. Her siblings at the time were aged 2 and 6 months and definitely couldn't write eldest DDs name.... Her face did that classic child-definitely-lying look where her eyes darted everywhere and she pursed her lips in case the truth came out....
Oddly though, I will be very sad when we replace the sofa because of the writing. It's so sweet.

Drawing on the walls is the worst one I think. DS went through a stage of grabbing a pen and dragging it across every vertical surface he passed- walls, furniture, everything.

I found it really stressful and he didn’t seem to learn his lesson no matter how I punished him for it!

ds who is 2, organised his own breakfast yesterday, cereals and milk everywhere, he was so proud that he almost did it!

cleaning up wasn't so much fun though

My DD has done a few including colouring her face & body with felt tips, giving all her dolls & teddies a hair cut, and squishing play d'oh into the carpet!
We know it could be worse though!!!

One of them going crazy with some talc was a low point!

DD is very fond of potion making as a result I find lots of organic matter in various states of decay all over the house. She reckons she’s gifted with magical powers and it’s only a matter of time before she can fly

At around 13 months out now 15 year old greeted me coming out of the shower. She’d woken from her nap, ninja’d out of her cot, got into the nappy bag and covered herself- naked other than a nappy, our dark carpet and a fabric sofa in the whole tub of sudocrem. I’d only been gone 5 minutes!
I took a photo which will be blown up and used as part of the decoration for her 18th birthday.

At about 4 years old DS put drawing pins on one of the lower stairs to, in his words “home alone Daddy” He’s now 7 and hasn’t done anything further to worry us he’ll grow into a psychopath!

My then 5 year old 'decorating' her 3 year old sisters face with felt tips. 3 year old obediently complying. I couldn't be cross, they were so earnest. But neither could I wash it off. She had a red-blue tint for a few days.
Same two drew all over a wall I had recently painted. Was cross about that one.
Youngest emptied all the soil out of all my houseplants - got it in his eyes and mouth too so came running into me complaining about it. He tried to do it again another time but I caught him in time!

There seems to have been a lot of rogue haircutting in other MNetters families! Mine were shockers not so much for what they did as for what they said. My eldest two provided a classy afternoon's entertainment for an entire train carriage one unforgettable summer, when ds1, then about 6yo, took it upon himself to explain to ds2, about 3yo, how to tell the difference between men's and women's bodies. Loudly. For an hour. With everybody listening. Never forgotten that for some reason...

When DS was about 2.5 he took the car keys and threw them into the middle of our neighbours very large tomato patch. We searched and searched, the neighbours searched, the other neighbour brought out a massive magnet and searched but the keys were not found. For about 4 months we has to use the rubbish spare key which didn't work the central locking. In the autumn the neighbour finally finished harvesting the tomatoes and cleared the patch and there we were finally able to retrieve the car keys. The keys were never left near DS again!