Active discussions

Please or to access all these features

Talk
Sponsored threads

This topic is for sponsored discussions. If you'd like to run one with us, please email [email protected].

MNHQ

Find out how Mumsnetters got help from their parents to get on the property ladder

457 replies

LucyBMumsnet · 17/12/2019 09:52

This sponsored discussion is now closed

Getting on the property ladder can be an uphill battle for first-time buyers - from the financial challenges to the legal paperwork it throws at home seekers, many rely on help from parents to make it happen. That’s why we want to find out if you’re considering or currently purchasing or have already purchased your first home and how you went about it.

So we are asking you what help you received or are receiving from your parents, if at all, and roughly, when this was? Who started the conversation, you or your parents? Did you tap into the Bank of Mum and Dad and how did you do that - through their savings, using their existing assets or property, them getting a loan, accessing their pensions or another way? Was it in the form of gift, loan or early inheritance? Did you seek legal advice and formalise the process with your parents? If so, how easy was it to sort out the legal side?

If you could, how would you change the process of receiving your parents’ financial support when buying your first home? If you’re considering saving for your own children’s futures - perhaps so they can buy a home - what’s important to you?

Whether you have considered, currently getting on the property ladder or already have your first dream home, post your thoughts on the topic on the thread below. All MN users who leave their opinion will be entered into a prize draw where 1 lucky winner will get a £150 voucher for a store of their choice (from a list).

Thanks and good luck,
MNHQ

Terms and conditions apply

Find out how Mumsnetters got help from their parents to get on the property ladder
OP posts:
JulesJules · 23/12/2019 17:54

My parents put money into savings for me and my sister from when we were babies. The money paid for a deposit on my first flat. We are doing the same for our DCs, but it's unlikely to be enough for a house deposit.

bokkleorandoove · 23/12/2019 19:09

My parents gave me a 40% deposit for my first flat 10 years ago. The money came from an inheritance they received from my grandmother. They instigated it and encouraged me to move out in my early 20s.

MamaNewtNewt · 23/12/2019 20:22

My parents couldn’t afford to help but my PIL kindly offered to give us £5000 for a deposit, again we wou,d have struggled to buy for a good few years without that help.

Serin · 24/12/2019 00:34

We didnt have any help from anyone.
We moved into our first home with nothing but a mattress to sleep on.
We were so happy though.

TheStuffedPenguin · 24/12/2019 07:41

No financial help from my parents who didn't have money to give but am now in the position of being able to help son . I subsidise his mortgage 350 a month and bought sofa and bed for him . His partner's parents paid their stamp duty for them . They are in London and property is expensive.

TheStuffedPenguin · 24/12/2019 07:42

Oh and I gave him 25k towards his deposit .

mynellie · 24/12/2019 11:52

My parents couldn't afford to help any of us kids onto the house ladder but they taught us to create a bottom draw from a young age so you had most of the kitchen bits and bedding plus towels already for when you did get a house

shrill · 24/12/2019 21:58

My parents couldn't help financially but brought me up to value every penny and save but also enjoy some of it along the way too. I'm doing the same for mine and hope that at some stage I might be able to help financially but if not then at least in practical supportive ways.

mishknight · 24/12/2019 22:13

Didn't receive any help from my parents. My OH's parents helped with the deposit. Saving now so we can help our DD when she is older

fishnships · 24/12/2019 22:18

Just before we got married we bought our own home with the help from our in-laws. Of course we were very grateful that they lent us some money - apart from the unwritten rule. It had to be in the area where they lived, which happened to be 15 miles (and two buses) from my family. The idea of actually owning our own home was so tempting that we overlooked the controlling aspect, which led to arguments and unhappiness which sometimes overshadowed what was otherwise a happy time. It wasn't until ten years later that we were in a position financially to move to an area closer to my own family. So, anyone else in a similar position, beware!

Nicole1709 · 24/12/2019 22:54

I'm still not on the property ladder sadly, but I have savings set aside and my parents are planning on chipping in on anything extra I need. (Aged 27).

soozybee1 · 25/12/2019 15:14

They didn't

RachelG85 · 25/12/2019 21:54

They paid half my deposit for me, couldn;t have done it without them x

Coconutbug · 25/12/2019 22:46

I didn't receive any help from my mum however my Nan/Grandad leant us £20k for a deposit, 2.5 years ago from savings. It is partially a gift/early inheritance. It was all completely up to them, they had help from their grandparents so really wanted to do the same for us. The only formality was a written/signed letter from them to the solicitor saying they were giving us the money.
It was all relatively easy and I'm not sure there's anything I would of changed. We had saved a relatively substantial amount that ended up paying for fees/furniture - if anything the hardest part was the saving and waiting to see if we'd be approved for a mortgage. Not being able to get a large enough mortgage for the house we ideally want.
My children both have ISAs which we aren't putting any money in at present but their grandparents are. I hope to be able to add more when our cashflow is better. I feel anything to help in the future will be better then nothing.

Didiusfalco · 25/12/2019 22:51

My parents helped with our legal fees, which was much appreciated. We weren’t married at the time and further into our relationship with a subsequent house move they actually helped us more. Which I think was wise really. I hope to be able to help my children as much as I can, it’s so difficult to get on the property ladder.

Happinessinapeartree · 25/12/2019 23:24

In short, they didn't.

From a family that always lived in council housing.

sproutsgalore · 26/12/2019 00:13

Got no financial assistance at all from either side. DM originally said she would help with some of the deposit, but when push came to shove she backed out fairly late on. We ended up having to take out a 100% mortgage for our first home (mid-1980's).

36degrees · 26/12/2019 06:07

Nothing financially from my parents - shortly after I bought my first place they inherited a property so were able to give a house to my DSis outright, but no spare cash, as it were. I was encouraged to work hard and save from a young age and after self-funding by working almost full time through university actually had enough saved for the deposit on my flat when I graduated.

Frenchw1fe · 26/12/2019 07:52

@36degrees your sis was given a whole house and you were given nothing? How did that make you feel?

OutComeTheWolves · 26/12/2019 08:18

First home my parents loaned us the money to get it carpeted. We repaid them.
Stayed in first home five years and could only sell it for less than we paid for it and my parents loaned us enough money to pay for solicitors and estate agents. Again we repaid them.
We were extremely grateful both times but it's been their help in other ways that's been invaluable- looking after the kids while we have house viewings, instilling in me the importance of saving, helping put up flat pack furniture. I know I'm very lucky to have had so much help and I'm sure I'll repay it when they're older and need my help!

MsMellivora · 26/12/2019 09:05

Nothing from either set of parents, three have now died. My Father had nothing much to leave anyone and both my Mother and FIL both left their estates to their favoured dc who just happen not to be DH and myself. Ah well at least my suspicions were correct, poor DH always wanted to believe him and his sister were equal in all aspects.

We both started saving at very young ages and have never had help with anything. We will give DS some money for a deposit.

36degrees · 26/12/2019 11:09

@Frenchw1fe it wasn't great at the time because I really could have done with the money but the obligations it brought with it are definitely not something I would want.

AnneElliott · 26/12/2019 12:24

No help to buy our first place. My parents didn't approve (I was 19) and his parents didn't have the money.

Once we moved in though my parents bought us a dining room table and the first weeks shopping. DHs mum won on the bingo that week and bought us a tv with her winnings.

asparagusnextleft5 · 26/12/2019 16:16

Not a penny - when we bought in the 1990s, both my in-laws and my own dad were all already dead, and my mum was in her 60s and not well off at all!
Our home cost £40000 so we needed a deposit of £2000 - sounds paltry these days but it was a struggle to save it up!

emmamcmahon · 26/12/2019 16:55

My parents had nothing to give