How to help teens become more confident - share with #iwill - chance to win £300 NOW CLOSED

[EllieMumsnet]

The team at #iwill would love to know how you help teens become (more) confident

What is #iwill?
The #iwill campaign promotes creating more opportunities for young people to get involved in social action - enabling more 10-20 year olds to say #iwill to doing activities such as campaigning, fundraising and volunteering in their communities to make them a better place.

By doing so, young people create a double-benefit – improving the lives of others around them, as well as improving themselves. By getting involved in social action, young people can develop their employability skills, boost access to further and higher education and enhance their well-being, communication skills and character.

So far more than 700 business, education and voluntary sector partners across the UK have pledged #iwill to embedding social action into the lives of young people so that all young people are able to experience the benefits of taking part.

They’d love to know your top tips on encouraging teens to develop their confidence in school, outside of school, during work experience or with adults. Do you encourage them to volunteer with local clubs etc, to mix with other young people from different backgrounds, have they flourished with some support from a mentor at school or do they need help to get through exams and school tests? If you had some confidence boosting experiences when you were a teen, please share what helped you become a confident teen too.

If you’d like to know more, do visit the #iwill pages here where you can sign up to get your FREE #iwill guide and monthly newsletters to find out more about the benefits of supporting your children to take part in volunteering & social action.

Check out their video here:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v= NR8YjpKseK4

Please share your top tips on teen confidence below - everyone who does will be entered into a prize draw where one person will win a £300 voucher for the store(s) of choice (from a list).

Thanks and good luck
MNHQ

Standard Insight T and Cs Apply

[sunshinewey]

This is no mean feat, but i think feeding them positive affirmations, helping to teach them the real values of life instead of the false social media images is very helpful, and to help them realise the potential of every person....

[lolamia91]

Show them they can do anything... trust and respect them and praise them in what they do

[ktmd]

#iwill I take disadvantaged teens on residentials where they engage in absailing, climbing, zip wires, archery and team building challenges. This really builds confidence and lasting friendships.

[iut044]

By listening to them and treating them with respect .

[Haffdonga]

Don't only praise or value the high status stuff (winning matches or awards, achieving high grades, getting good jobs). Praise and value the mundane everyday stuff that they may not appreciate about themselves (kindness, knowledge of obscure indie music, helpfulness, ability to make grandma laugh, caring about the environment/refugees/ whatever they care about).

[strawberrisc]

We have long talks about how social media, paper media and television is NOT real life. My daughter is aware of what airbrushing is and how the press can manipulate images. As corny as it might sound to adults I really do teach my daughter that the important things in life are friends and family and that the MOST important thing is to be good to them. This helps lead to self-worth.

[easter1965]

Listening....That is essential, not just advising and talking to them but to find out if they are struggling with confidence and why, I've had 5 children so have been in the situation of having teens with confidence issues, gentle praise and encouragement helps, I found with one of my daughters she was shy, had no confidence even though teachers were praising her so much at school they said she didn't have the confidence to even raise her hand in class, I found after school clubs really helped because it was more of a relaxed atmosphere, then in the summer holidays she put her name down to take part in a scheme that ran for activities with a registered group and help younger ones struggling for anything to do in their holidays, she loved it and soon became a team leader and now she is a lot more confident and helps others so much with her experience

[Ethan260908]

I find this quite a difficult area to teach. I think confidence is linked to personality which is linked to upbring. I know some children who appear to be more confident than me. It does give me a better understanding, how to know that confidence improves with age. Perhaps also with experience. I echo those comments above about consistant talking and listening and mutual respect. My own son taught me how to cut bread better (French stick) and he stil dines out on that even today. It instill in him a sence of unwaivering pride and intrinsic "can do" attitude which transfers to other areas of his life which aren't so buttoned down. Even failures/cock up/areas of improvement generate open debate and self awareness. Admitting to a lack of confidence IMHO often is to spark to improving.

[IonaAilidh11]

always talk to them honestly

[glennamy]

I passed on my knowledge of when I was a teen, stating that most of her peers are going through the same things, having worries etc... Also if she believed in something, to follow it through with passion. I always listened to her problems and gave advice. but it was up to her what she did with that advice!

[barbsbarbs]

lots of praise, encouragement and a willingness to drive them to clubs and activities that boost confidence. Also being bale to accept your teen for who they are and however they choose to dress.

[Emabby]

With my family talking is key they know what ever fluffs no matter how bad! I will always love them! Communication! Trust but also listening as they will make mistakes and you have be their to dust them off pick them up and start the roller coaster all over again I do say what I’ve done the good and bad but always let them make their own choices! Love them no matter what when their angry when their sad and when they just want friend!

[liz1970]

Always talk to them with respect and respect there views and wishes.

[RACHELSMITH45]

Give praise and encouragement often. Allow them independence and encourage them to try something new as often as possible. Good communication is key and so is positivity.

[beckyinman]

I trust that they know to do the right thing even if it may rock the boat.

[allsorts4444]

Show them real life, let them make mistakes so that they understand how to learn from them and are therefore confident in them selves to make decisions. Let them be whoever they want to be and give them support always

[kristianjsnooks]

Encourage outside interests, From clubs and sports to hobbies and even voluntary or part time work - Something that enables them to become part of something wider than their circle of friends will always build confidence along with people skills and dealing a structured routine in an enjoyable environment

[gd2011]

Give them the freedom to make mistakes

[Cailin7]

Support them in their decisions and listen. Our DCs have all benefited from either volunteer work, part time weekend jobs and sport participation. They have increased their confidence and maturity.

[sarah861421]

Be confident yourself. compliment them but do not lie to them, I f they look good say so but if they dont , dont say anything

[phillie1]

Very hard for todays teens - they seem to have so much less confidence than I did at their age, a lot of which is caused by all the false images they see on social media, and seeing evidence of the things they havent been invited to etc

[pennwood]

How to help teens become more confident starts way before they become teenagers. Having a pet that they are responsible for as a youngster builds confidence, & ensuring you communicate to them all the positive things they do & say. Encouraging them to volunteer, join cadet schemes, & participate in all the activities available through school such as Duke Of Edinburgh Awards.

[sm2012]

I work in a school and I find talking to teens rather than at them helps. Also I pay them compliments based on their skills and personalities such as commenting on a piece of artwork or recognising the effort they have made in doing something.

[addverbaan]

I give my son a reasonable amount of freedom when it comes to decisions and encourage discussion to help him make good choices. This gives him a lot of confidence and helps him to feel empowered

[tabbaz123]

As a foster carer building a young persons confidence and sense of self worth is absolutely paramount! We ensure that we partake in many different activities and always find something that they are Good at! We have taken many on sailing holidays and found that confidence grows as you sail and you are away from reality that can be a good change #iWill