Tell Fairy Non Bio about how you and your DC make friends - win a £300 voucher! NOW CLOSED

[JustineBMumsnet]

As part of our partnership with Fairy Non Bio, we’ve produced the Mumsnet Babies Podcast. There are ten episodes in the series and episode 7, which you can listen to here, is about making friends and being nice. When you get the chance, Fairy Non Bio would like you to listen to the podcast and share your thoughts - not just about the new friends you’ve made since having a baby, but also about how your baby socialises with other children.

Whether you go to parenting groups and classes in your spare time or not, making friends as a new mother isn’t always easy. Have you felt like it can be isolating, and that you have nothing in common with the other mothers in your area (apart from the presence of your tiny children)? Or perhaps you’ve found that parenting can be a reason to bond with other people, even if it’s just a case of having someone to grumble with about sleepless nights and dirty nappies? And of course it would be negligent to forget to mention Mumsnet as a platform on which mums can socialise and make new friends!

And then, as your baby gets older, their social life may become the minefield you need to navigate. Have you been mystified by your little one's’ ability to make best friends with complete strangers in the playground? Perhaps you’ve struggled to deal with getting them to share nicely with other children?

Whatever your experiences of friendship during early motherhood, post on the thread below and you’ll be entered into a prize draw to win a £300 Love2Shop voucher!

If you’d like to rate the Mumsnet Babies Podcast, please go to the iTunes store and leave a review.

Thanks and good luck,

MNHQ

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I met some of my closest friends through the play groups. Even though my children are now teenagers, I still get together regularly with the mums I met all those years ago. We have formed a book group, we go running together and regularly meet for meals and drinks etc.

luckily i had friends who were pregnant the same time as me so my little mummy circle was already there.
we had our babies months apart so we are always meeting up, discussin milestones, ideas and tips and tricks lol

I found it very hard with my first child as non of my close friends had children - it was quite lonely at times. By the time number two came along I had started going to local toddler groups run at churches - they were a life saver. I made some wonderful friends who I still meet up with now (even though my children are at school). We catch up with the children at the park and in the evening at the pub (without the children!)

We moved to the other side of the country and whilst my little one quite naturally made friends at nursery etc I found it harder as the mums were a bit clicky and would say they couldn't understand my accent. Eventually in just didn't bother trying anymore as actually they aren't nice women and not people I want my daughter around. Instead ive met nicer people at the local park and at swimming

I found it very difficult too, especially now I'm one of the few WOHM in our group. I'm limited to certain days to catch up and it's tricky when all the kids do different days in nursery/preschool. For the mums, we organise a night out every 4-6 weeks. I found the best way generally is to just be proactive about messaging people and suggesting things!

it's only now my older children are at school i have found mums to talk to in the playground or at parties, before that there was no one i knew nearby

I moved to a new area when pregnant, and though naturally a shy introvert who doesn't like socialising, I forced myself to go out to baby groups, thinking it would be the easiest way to mix in a new town.

Luckily I met a great group of people right away - that was seven years ago. We are not all close friends now, the friendships changed as the kids grew up and went to different schools, but we still meet up for meals out sometimes.

I did the same with my second child and the mums seem to have bonded a bit more but again the kids are young so it's tricky to see if it's friends for a season or friends for a reason! I could ask any of them if I needed help though.

As for kids, it's been lovely to see friendships develop from an early age. Certainly at 2.5 my daughter has made good buddies with the kids we see in and out of nursery. My son was too shy to make good friends with non-nursery kids (ie my friends' children) but when I saw him interact at nursery it was a different story. Before he was three he'd made two good friends that he still sees now.

I think it's important to socialise from a young age, there are so many groups out there and social events it gets them used to different children and personalities.

I find I need to make the first move. It's really difficult.

Children are amazing at making friends - 5 minutes in the park and DD usually has a gang to play with. As a mum, its more difficult - when the DCs arrived we lived in an area that just didn't seem to have people open to making new friends- i found it soul destroying to be honest. Then we moved to an area with more 'open' people and now i feel i have some solid friendships with people i have more in common with than just having children. Just keep smiling and remember its their loss if they're not receptive.

I found it easier to make friends when my three DC's reached school age and just got nattering to other Mums at the school gates.

I was able to make some friends by going to mother's and baby groups in local churches and schools. It great to know parents with children similar age because they can play together and probably would go to the same school later on.

I feel very lucky - I had a large circle of friends before I had any children and have found that that circle has increased since having them. I've made need friends through baby groups and also through friends of friends. I find if you have a similar set up your immediately have something in common / to talk (rant!) about and it just goes from there.
Saying that, a couple of friends who I was really close to before starting a family are now rarely seen or heard of since I had children- they don't have any and our lives seem to have gone down different paths and we've drifted which is a shame.
You definitely need friends who are in a similar position to you, they understand (ie. why you look like chap because you've had 4 hours sleep!!!!)

I found it hard - we moved when my Dd was small so I missed NCT and newborn baby groups. Made lots of acquaintances through toddlers groups but none really developed into proper friendships. Eventually made one good friend through nursery picks ups. I'd say y main tip is to keep putting yourself out there & going to the same events if you can - I made my friend from pick up through being at the same place every day - it took a while to start really talking but those short daily bursts helped.

play dates. usually go to the park and feed the ducks :P

I found making friends when I had babies was so much easier than now with a 5 and 3 year old. We just go and ask names and say hello. I've also found social media a good way to make friends which I never thought I would, like online dating for parents!

My daughter is so shy amongst new people, she may be happy, smiling chatting away to me and as soon as someone says hello to her she will just be silent and want to cuddle me. Takes her a good hour to come out of her shell and by that time groups have finished.
I mostly have met mums through my older child being in year 1 and then some of them have siblings my youngest daughters age

I found it really hard to make friends as I moved to the other end of the country to where my husband is from, so I made a conscious effort to go to as many classes as I could; sensory, baby massage etc. It really benefitted me and my lg.

We moved to a new area when my DD was about 18 months old. Also, the house we moved to had to have lots done to it (whilst we were living there) so there were lots of days that DD and I had to make ourselves scarce for the day.

We made friends by going to baby and toddler groups - 16 years on DD is still friends with some of those children she met there and I'm still friends with the mums!

We also used to chat to people in the park or the local library which has a really good children's area and lots of book-related events.

I have to admit I never went to NCT, I did go to baby groups with my first (of 2) but I didn't make friends - probably because I didn't try hard enough. I was lucky enough for my friends to be pregnant at the time and in all honesty I wasn't interested in making new friends. I also enjoyed and enjoy my DCs company! Call me weird. Not suggesting others who want to make friends and have adult company don't.

I did a NCT course and made friends with the other 7 mums- I ended up walking away from them though as it got very cliquey and I ended up feeling crap most the time.
I've generally made friends with parents of my DC's friends who I get on well with.
What can make life harder are the more cliquey groups at school. I've learned a few good friends is better than loads of shallow friendships.

And the DC just ask if other children want to play with them

I found it very difficult to find and make friends in early motherhood because there is very little spare time as a newborn is so demanding only once my eldest started primary i had just started to make friends with other parents

I was a shy retiring kid, who didn't make friends easily, but when I did I felt great! So I found it hard showing my first three children how to make friends, although they soon found their own way and got there in their own time, but I absolutely love how my youngest makes friends!
The first time I saw her I was a little in awe of how fearless she was, especially as she's the 'baby' of the family and I guess we all treat her as such...anyway, we were at the play-area attached to my husbands work, my little girl was four, and she marched up to this older girl who had a large birth-mark across her face. For a minute I was so worried that my little girl would be tactless and upset this child, but my girl went up to this older girl, who looked about 6, and said "I love your face, want to be my friend?"
And this girl was so happy to be included, which then made my daughter happy, & so she has done the same ever since, I see her sizing people up, then she will go over, pick out a compliment such as "Your hair is so gold and beautiful, will you be my friend?" Or her latest "Your Mummy is even prettier than my Mummy, will you play with me?"
Must admit I didn't see that one coming! lol. She always means the compliments too, which, you know, can smart a little! ;-) x