What funny things have you heard from the back seat of your car? Tell Fiat for a chance to win £250 voucher NOW CLOSED

[MichelleMumsnet]

Fiat have asked us to find out what the most amusing things Mumsnetters have heard coming from the backseat of their car are.

Here’s what Fiat say, “Every growing family needs room for more. It’s why we created the Fiat 500L range: the Fiat 500L, the Fiat 500L Trekking and the Fiat 500L MPW. You not only get huge amounts of style but also 5 seats (the option of 7* in the Fiat 500L MPW), a large boot, 22 handy storage compartments and a 5” touchscreen multimedia system with Bluetooth.”

“The Fiat 500L range makes life easier for busy parents without compromising on style and that’s why we’re working with Mumsnet with the mums and dads who can relate to the joys and pains of travelling with kids. If like us, you have hilariously funny stories about the conversations that go on in the back seat of your car whilst travelling, then we’re sure you probably want to share them too!”

So, what corkers have your DCs come up with while sitting in the backseat of the car? Perhaps they’ve demanded you to stop driving so that you can examine their latest new find from in between the car seats? Or maybe they’ve given a particularly creative commentary on the different things and places you’ve passed by in the car? Whatever it is, we’d love to hear it!

Everyone who adds their thoughts to the thread will be entered into a prize draw to win a £250 Love2Shop voucher.

Please note that any comments posted on this thread may be used by Fiat in further marketing material (anonymously, of course).

Thanks and good luck,

MNHQ

[Keepcalmanddrinkwine]

The spider post reminded me of when DD was about 2 and loved all living creatures far too much (think snails in the dressing up box and woodlice in her bed).

I was driving along at a fairly high speed when I heard DD chatting away; "Hello Mr Bee, how are you? Ooh Mummy, he's going into my top for a cuddle!"

Cue me pulling over as soon as safely possible to remove said bee from inside DDs top before she got stung.

[gin33333]

My 9 year old son was sitting in the pasenger seat of my daughters fiat looking in the mirror saying who is that sexy dude in the mirror while I was sitting in the back seat

[rockybalboa]

I've just listened to my 5 yo DS have pretend mobile phone discussion in the back of the car with 'one of his builder mates'. He also 'spoke' to his friend's wife and one of their 4 children.

[Ruby6918]

i used to bring an old aunt out weekly for shopping who had really dreadful teeth and breath and the two wee ones sat in the back, one day the oldest one asked mummy why do u always wind down the window even in the rain before aunty gets into the car and u hate gettin wet, aunty and me sat in silence one wet and one dry for the rest of the journey

[mrscumberbatch]

Daughter (4) "Mummy, do you know what Daddy says when he drives?"

She throws her hands up in the air and pulls her hair

"OHWHATNOW YOU IDIOT!"

Told off Dp when I got home- no more road rage!! Little spy in the back seat! (There's video proof as well! She's multitasking.)

[graniah]

"Shhh, Alex! You can't say "fracking", it's REALLY rude" My 7 year old daughter chastising my 5 year old son who was innocently asking a question about an item on the news.

[WowOoo]

When we played 'I spy' on a long drive recently, ds said it got boring as all we can see is trucks, roads and trees.

So he came up with crocodile, alien spaceship, pirate hat and other wonders. All acceptable because it's a crocodile or spaceship shaped cloud...Made us laugh. Dh assured me that there was a crocodile shaped cloud, but i had to keep my eyes on the road.

[CMOTDibbler]

Ds (then 5) and I were singing along to the Glee version of Forget You, sung by Gweneth Paltrow.

Ds (singing) I see you drive round town with the girl I love..

Mummy, she loves a lady

Yep

If two ladies love each other, how would they make a baby

Weeeeelllll, they'd need to get some seed from someone kind who wants to help them.

(thoughfull silence) Like the doctor?

Well, not directly the doctor

This went on for some time till I'd been forced to cover all the possibilities

A few weeks later he was at softplay with dh 'daddy, look those two ladies have a baby, I wonder where they got the seed from, can I ask them?'

[8mhigh]

Mum? How come dad is better at driving even though he does it twice as fast?

[pinkangelita]

"Mummy help! I've got lunch all over my face" I was very confused as we hadn't given our 2 year old daughter any food. I turned around... She had stuck all her 'food' stickers from peppa pig's picnic all over her face

[hellymart]

My goddaughter, from the back, when I was driving her mum, DGD and me to the swimming pool: "Mummy, where do babies come from?"
My friend explained that she had grown in her tummy.
Silence for a moment, then, "Mummy - did you EAT me?"

[AnneOfCleavage]

Driving along one day and I get cut up by an inconsiderate driver:

Me: Stupid cow
DD(age 3): silly sheep

[addictedtosugar]

Going to meet his friend, I, who lives about 30 miles away, but we were meeting at a soft play, not his house, DS1, aged about 3.5, shouted "No, Mummy, No, No No, other way to I house" as I turned right to the softplay rather than left to the village.

[SixImpossible]

There was a road we used to drive down that had marvellous horse chestnuts on either side. One day when ds1 was about 2.5y, we drove down it to find that the council had topped all the trees, leaving nothing but tall, bare trunks. Ds was deeply shocked (as was I - it looked barbaric, even though I knew that the branches would regrow completely within a few years) and almost burst into tears:

Mummy, mummy, oh no, where they live?
Don't worry, sweetie, the birds can make their nests in bushes.
No mummy, not birds. Aeroplanes, where aeroplanes live now?

Turns out he thought that aeroplanes were little flying things that live in trees!

[milliemoon]

Son: mummmmy?
Me: yes, love?
Son: *buuurrrrppp

Boys!!!!

[Loveneverfails]

Darling husband drops our two eldest to a friends house, leaving him and 3 year old toddler in the car.

A wee voice pipes up from the back seat...



'Daaaaaaaaaaaaaddy. Are you thinking what I AM thinking?'

My husband said 'Depends. What ARE you thinking?'

Toddler boldly states... 'Macdonalds and soft play'. That ok with you?

Sweet!

And that is what they did with their free time

[StetsonsAreCool]

Today, on the way to a birthday party...

DD: "I'll pretend to be [my name] and Mommy you pretend to be [her name]."

Me: "ok, what about Daddy?"



DD: "Daddy, you pretend to be a grandad"

Ouch...

[Loveneverfails]

This is a bad one.

One day, a woman started gesticulating at me for being in the wrong lane (I had realised and was trying to get IN to the right lane but I did not know the area). In stead she refused to let me in and was along side me gesticulating with her fists.

I am normally polite and kind.

This day I SAW RED

I let her go ahead, then completely tail gailed her for a mile bumper to bumper . It was as if a red mist descended. All the while saying 'what a silly woman' to the kids in the back.

My son was five at the time and piped up 'what's she done mummy?'

I replied 'she has forgotten to take her tablets. THATS what she has done' to which a wee voice (his sisters, from beside him) piped up...

'I think you did too'.


The shame!


The red mist ascended at this stage and I stopped tail gaiting the old bat.

Though we did see each other in the local markies a few days later .

Old bag

[ElzBevan]

in the car on Saturday and a massive hailstorm with thunder and lightning elicted this gem from my 7 year old son
'pull over dad, I don't wanna die today'!

[RockySpeed]

DS -I'm thirsty

Me - when we get home I'll get you some juice

DS - I want beer

Me - you can't have beer darling, beer is just for grown ups

DS - total melt down screaming and crying "I want beer" all the way home

[nemno]

5 year old DS, "so Mummy, you've had sex twice?"

Yes, he has one sibling.

[KatoPotato]

Driving home from an eventful trip to my DMum's.

Radio comes on announcing you can win a 'brand new ipad'

DS (2 at the time) starts howling... 'A NEW IPAD! we have an OLD IPAD!!!'

this continued for about 40minutes...

[MichelleMumsnet]

Thanks for all the posts so far, keep them coming! Fiat would like to give away a couple Brian the Bear cuddly toys as spot prizes to a few MNers on the thread. The first prize goes to Purplehonesty! Fiat say, "This is had us in stitches, Purplehonesty! It’s so funny when our little ones say one thing but mean another. As a thank you for making us giggle we’re sending you a Brian the Bear toy, perfect for you or your DS.

P.S Don’t forget to put your undertakers on!"

We'll be in touch soon.

[learnermummy]

On crossing the QE2 bridge DS1(3) pipes up - 'What a beautiful view!' each to their own!