NOW CLOSED: Share with BT how you would help (or have helped) your mum, MIL or gran get online this Mother’s Day. You could win an iPad, worth £329!

[AnnMumsnet]

We've been asked by BT as part of their Get IT Together campaign to ask you for your top tips for getting the older generation online.

And BT would love you to help spread the word about their campaign, too. They're aiming to help 100,000 people get online by the end of this year.

If your mum, or somebody else you know, isn't online, why not help them get there this Mother's Day? As the internet is such a brilliant way to keep in touch with family, share photos and shop online for gifts for the grandchildren what better Mother's Day gift could there be?

According to BT, about 8 million people have never used the internet, and, as Gabby Logan, spokesperson for BT's Get IT Together campaign, says it's often just lack of confidence that stops them getting started. "Maybe they feel daunted or worry they are going to do something wrong," says Gabby. "If your mum isn't online, like my mum wasn't, why not spend some time with her and help her take those first steps? Get IT Together BT's Get IT Together website has step by step advice and videos to help you both. I'm sure she won't look back - my mum certainly didn't!?

Please do use this thread to share your tips with other MNers, and with BT, about getting your mum, MIL, grandmother or anyone older get online - whether you've done it already or are just gearing up for it.

Tell us your stories, too! How did you/will you approach it? Will/did you get your children involved? What does/will your mum or MIL most like to do on the net? Will she be/is she already a Gransnetter?

Everyone who adds a tip or story to this thread will be entered into a prize draw, from which one lucky person will win a 16GB iPad 2 worth £329. Please note your comments may be used on the BT pages on Mumsnet. Your MN nickname may be used along with your quote.

Thanks and good luck
MNHQ

well, after years months of pondering getting broadband and a laptop, my DHs nan bought one a few weeks ago. She was trying her best to get to grips with websites (william hill bingo mainly) and trying to set up an 'email thingy' but not really making much headway on that one...

i work in IT and sat down with her at the weekend and showed her how to set up her own email and skype. She was very impressed with skype in particular especially when she managed to speak to her DD (DHs aunt) who lives in pennsylvania USA! this was the first time they had looked at each others faces in 6 years she cried a bit and DHs aunt told her she looked old!

she plans to get up early on sunday to do it again although in all honesty, it may end up being middle of the night territory for one of them

I would had helped my gran by enrolling her on a silver surfers course. I wouldnt have had enough patience!

I 'taught' my mum and her friend at the same time, and went very slowly. They each had matching notebooks, which they filled up with their step-by-step instructions.

Now they email/skype/FB each other all the time, and send each other pics of their grandchildren. A lot of pics.

I would like my mum to have an iPad, she is too impatient to wait for her laptop to get started.

We gave my mil a really ancient apple mac and once she realised she could use it to look up crossword clues she loved it. Unfortunately things have moved on and she is not really able for it now but when she comes for the day she likes to sit with me and catch up with friends & wikipedia

My mum emails me because she's realised it's the best way of getting a reply, we are often out or busy when she phones (she has a habit of phoning at family dinner time on a weekday, really not helpful). So she is getting quite into emailing because I always do reply to email.

She won't do anything else except email, or the occasional bit of online shopping. I tried to get her involved in an older people's chat forum which a friend of mine started, she had shown interest but when it came down to it I think she found it too bizarre an idea, that you might talk to people online for fun.

My mum is a complete technophobe. She's on her 3rd computer as she manages to brk them all. She said she wanted 'a facebook' so I set her up with a fb page, now she looks at it every day, she won't comment on anything, she'll just ring me up to tell me off for swearing in my statuses, and moan about all her friends.

I got her a kindle for Christmas, and she's kind of figured that out, although there was a slight issue when all her dirty books romance novels got delivered to a different kindle she's bought as a gift for her neice.

My mom has been online for a while and is quite adpet at it really.

But the best thing I ought to do for her is introduce her to friffing Snopes.

Cut up onions can steal the poison from pneunomia in the air, can it mom?

And so on in forwarded emails ad infinitum.

My Nana doesn't go online at all but to tempt her online I'd tell her all about online Bingo. She's a right gambling gran!

What I did was make an arrangement with my mums downstairs neighbour that she could use her wifi to log into.

Lots of older people just starting on the Internet are not heavy users. You don't want to sign them up for clunky dial-up, but they don't want the expense of an all-you-can-eat broadband deal.

I think BT Openzone hotspots work a bit like this - with you able to share wifi safely?

I wonder if BT could set up an Openzone scheme for older people, where they get free membership. More people with Internet connections might sign up if they saw it as almost a charitable act - donating wifi to 'help the aged' - I don't know if the technology would work but it would be great if the scheme could be used by people with all different ISPs, using one system to donate wifi which can be used by silver surfers who are light users, at no cost. Would be good CSR.

My tip: have a baby and then move abroad! My 76 year old grandmother learned to skype within a week, followed by my mum and then technophobically challenged sister - nothing like a cute baby to provide motivation!

A less drastic tip would be to give them a short tutorial on how to use the "undo" button/ctrl Z feature that is useful on a lot of programs, it gives a new user a lot of confidence to know how to easily get out of a mistake.

My grandmother decided she wanted to get online about 10 years ago now, when she was a spring chicken of 85. I bought her a cheapo secondhand computer and sent her off down to the library to get a few basic lessons, which really helped her to get started.

She's an old pro now, and spends ages skyping and swapping dirty jokes with all her friends via email. She mainly uses the internet for the bbc website and for 'the google'.

It's her 96th birthday next month, and she's asked for a Kindle . I love my grandma.

There is no hopes at all that id get my Nan online - shes petrified in fact shes scared of channel 4 .....i made the big mistake of telling her that on google street sjes in her front garden stood by the gate- now shes convinced that us on the 'information superhighway' are able to stalk her in her house and as a result shes always got to wear her teeth!!

My elderly Fil however truly believes that I can use it to find out anything and comes with random tasks for me to complete for him ......

My friends dad was fab with the pc and I was totally in awe of him .....turns out he used to design pc programmes years ago .

My MIL had become quite used to emailing us, but with her retirement approaching we knew she would then be left without access to a computer. She didn't say anything to us but we knew that would be very hard for her, not living close to her grand kids.

I went on line and found a nice reconditioned laptop for a decent price, and when she came for Christmas we had it all wrapped up under the tree ready for her. She was speechless when she open it! We helped arrange a broadband connection for her, and BIL went over to her place to make sure it was all set up. Brilliant.

We then surprised her again and sent her a webcam. Although the set-up instructions seemed quite simple to us, she really wasn't confident with connecting it. So DH had the idea of talking her through it on a skype call, even telling her which boxes to tick at each stage of the set-up wizard!

We now do video Skype calls at least once a week. She looks forward to it so much! The kids go up to the screen and show her things they have made, or tell her about their favourite toys - just those little everday things that she would otherwise miss out on. Despite the distance we are now connected in a way that we didn't think was possible.

My mum is slowly but surely getting online, although she still thinks that she 'might break the internet'. She took a course at the library, but the tutor seemed to be rather uninspiring. The only thing that's made a big difference is the promise of seeing her soon-to-arrive granddaughter on Skype!

I think older people can think that somehow everyone else is loads better than them 'on computers', so my top tip is to show/explain that most other people don't know much more than they do. I don't understand computers particularly, I just know how to send emails etc and know when to ask someone else to help!

We bought my Dad an ipad for Christmas. Previously, even after many sessions sitting by him, trying to help him, he had always had a nightmare with Skype. Now, on the ipad it's so easy. He can carry it around the house showing us what he's done. What plants are growing in the garden etc etc. And, when he has my kids with him they can use it too to skype with me.

My mother refuses point blank to use a computer or do anything online or with email. She's in her 70s, has memory loss and has to write everything down in terms of instructions (including for her mobile phone - it has tiny sticky labels all over it e.g. on/off).

Given that she can barely work her TV, can't get her head around remote controls and might be better living in the dark ages, I have no idea how to get her online. Maybe something like an iPad could help, if I set her up with an online email provider like gmail, and helped her to press the buttons etc. But frankly, I can't see her even trying to use it. And would also have to get her broadbank and wifi which again, she wouldn't want.

I know that her local library do classes, but she has a mindset that she will not learn and will not remember what to do.

Her sister is always online - and very patient. Maybe I could enlist her help.

We use the internet alot to communicate with my parents and grandparents. My

Dad very selflessly purchased an ipad to make it easier to share photos with my Grandmother who is now nearly 90. She can look at the screen without having to squint. We're also regularly in touch using skype.

We're about to move to BT hub now our current broadband contract has run out too.

My mum has been very reluctant to use the internet, however, when she saw my sister using her Ipad and saw how easily accessible it was, she changed her mind. She now has her own tablet and is starting to keep in touch with the family with email and social networking. It was a lack of confidence that held her back before, but once she saw the advantages of instant communication with the family from daughters, to grandchildren and old friends, it has given her the motivation to learn. The next lesson will be how to use the Marks & Spencer web site and then there will be no going back!

My mother is a lost cause - finally set her up on a phone (cant even imagine a computer!) and how to text etc. She spent about 2 hours trying to text a number, gave up in frustration, to find out she was trying to text to a landline! She does laugh over this story though. But she is up and running with her mobile, and has found that the grandchildren have taught her the most! They seem to love showing her what to do, and how she can use her phone better. I still find it hard to get text speak from my mother!

My MIL is on email; has just joined facebook (her daughter set this up for her) , and does use the computer quite a bit, but still seems wary of it. I have shown her how to buy things like airtickets etc online, and she finds it hard to believe that if she is in a different country she can still access the easyjet site! However we do use skype and email regularly and as we live on different continents, it is really useful the more that they learn and make use of technology as it helps us bridge that geographical divide.

My only tip is patience and humour, and perhaps using the much younger generation to help. Doing practical things like lets book that airticket together; let me show you how to shop online at John Lewis, lets book the cinema ticket, all work ......

I used to live in abroad and my brother stills lives in Egypt. We got all of the grandparents set up on Facebook and Skype before we left and they loved it because it is such a great way to stay in touch.

At first my grandparents had google as their homepage so they would just type in whatever they wanted and click, until they got the hand of it.

[bites tongue to avoid saying that my elderly mom would have no trouble being online if BT's broadband wasn't so crap]

My dad, who will be 85 this year, is online now.

We have set up the webcam, and skype connection for him, but there are some obvious problems.

My dad is paralyzed after a stroke. He has limited use of one hand only. He also has a very poor short term memory. This means he has some problems with things such as username and password for his email account, his hotmail account need him to log in regularly. Which he cant do, because of large hands with limited mobility means he hits the wrong key frequently. This means he dont really reply to emails either. He has similar problems using skype.

My Appeal to BT: If you want to get the elderly online, remember the old adage, you can bring a horse to water but you cannot make it drink. For some elderly folks, they can be connected, but the issues they have in using the technology means they still stay away. Whether it is for mobility reasons or memory reasons, all software, and solutions, are geared up to the young and healthy, there is nothing that is simple for the octogenarians among us to use.

For my grandmother, who is approaching 80, it was my mother showing her Skype the week my DS was born. We were living in China at the time, and my grandmother was totally overwhelmed by the Skype calls she had with me and DS those precious first few days of his life. She then got my mum to take her computer shopping and hasn't looked back since.

We're quite a spread-out family so it means so much for her not to 'miss out' on events now that she can't travel so easily.

She now Skypes and emails all her children, grandchildren and great-grandchildren regularly.

She doesn't have a Facebook account, but she did tell me she has my cousin's log-in details so she regularly checks all our pages!

my mother bless her can not work a mobile ... never mind anything else she does not put mobile up to her ear and just shouts down also once lent her my mob and she used a pen to press the numbers