The Goose and Carrot July Edition

[Lougle]

All welcome, and everything disappears after 90 days.

It's scary @inthequietofdawn . The thing with the dose makes me feel vulnerable too, but fortunately, for that reason, I record changes as she instructs them, there and then. My calendar export file clearly shows the creation date as 10:18 UTC, which was 11:18 on the date it was created. We met on teams at 11:00 (so 10:00 UTC) for an ADHD assessment meeting. So I made the entry during the meeting. Why would I record a dose increase if I hadn't been instructed to?

lougle that psychiatrist sounds really bad - almost in fitness to practise territory.
thegoodcat of course you want (and need) a night away. I hope DD's mental health picks up soon.
LathkillDale my Mum had broken ribs after resuscitation after a heart attack. She was the least complaining person you could meet but the pain was obviously severe. I hope Dd gets some effective pain relief.

I would be tempted to ask the phychiatrist to confirm any dose changes in writing @Lougle to cover your back incase of problems / professionals selective memory loss.

Hope DDs mental health improves @thegoodcat and you can get a night away.
Sorry about the seizures @Wellzizizbetter and @LathkillDale

We are just back from Sri Lanka and had a wonderful time. We went first night to a lovely hotel with swimming pool and went to a tea plantation then onto Yala National Park and Kumana National Park for safaris with conservationists. Saw lots of wildlife including leopards, buffalo, elephants, crocodile, peacock, deer, mongoose, king mongoose, egret, eagles and lots of beautiful birds in both national parks. In Kumana there was a hindu led pilgrimage going on so we saw that and temple and school children in uniform, girls with umbrellas as parasols. Then on to Ella where we did the train ride, saw a tea plantation. Up to Dambulla, saw cave temple and walked up Lions Rock at sunrise. Quite a magical trip. Few pics attached, Lions Rock, elephants Kumana, safari Kumana, elephant on road between Yala and Kumana, rice fields view from our balcony at Yala hotel.

We got messages from DD all holiday, the cat being let out by accident by DS and DS bringing him back, I melted the scales and bought you a new one by DD and DS has moved the hammer and eaten my kinder bueno from DD. Now back to house, garden and shed.

What a lovely holiday @Tulipandmagnolia .

Dose changes normally are confirmed in writing, but because this was during an ADHD assessment, I think it got missed.

@Tulipandmagnolia - it sounds like a fantastic holiday! Lovely photos! Elephants are such interesting animals!

@Lougle I looked up about bupivacaine patches. One of the risks is seizures, and the info said people with epilepsy can use them, but they have to stick to the strict instructions. Given DD1 has a seizure at any change in her physical or sometimes emotional state, I wouldn’t increase the risk of seizures, or she could be into status epilepticus.

That is so difficult. I hope she feels more comfortable soon.

@Lougle we always get a written request to GP for meds increase even though almost all the increases are done over the phone and we have the meds already. Since the GP prescribes (this is almost always the epilepsy meds not the ADHD) they have to know how much to prescribe. Of course it doesn't mean they don't send us packets and packets of 25mg still when we go up from something-75 to a round 100, nor does it mean they remember to add on 50s when we go from a round number up to something-50. But we can refer back to the letter on his file.

DS and I had a bit of (as he would say) argy-bargy last night, which I didn't need after an intense work day and a full on cooking session (they were out at the cinema so I decided to get a start on today's dinner as well as yesterdays). He was really struggling with his maths that is on an app so I got a piece of paper and broke down the problems (it had both word problems which are his nemesis, and mixed fractions which he doesn't really get). But just like he won't look at his hands when he's doing something with them (tying a knot, sewing on his Scout badges), he wouldn't look at the paper so I got cross and he threw his water at me.
Which (though I didn't say it) I was grateful for and then I went and had a bath and put the stool against the door to stop annoying children coming in (see previous about not having a lock!)

@drspouse it's so frustrating sometimes when you're trying to help. I hope things have calmed down.

I do normally get written letters to state that there is an increase, but I think the psychiatrist was distracted by doing the ADHD assessment and it's possible that she forgot the conversation at the end of the meeting when she was writing her notes. I don't know. All I do know is that the timestamp of the calendar entry was 18 minutes into our Teams meeting. I don't know why I would break away from our meeting, write an increase into my calendar, then continue the meeting, unless she had told me to increase the meds.

@Lougle don’t second guess yourself that’s what your written records are for - to confirm your sanity during moments of doubt.

i think I might like to work again. If I am paid monthly how does Carers Allowance work….. I think it’s ok to not get it even if I earn slightly over as the benefits of working would do me good. Would I stay eligible? In case work is too much to cope with?

Also I don’t think my monthly earnings will be consistent. So if I earn under the following month do I get the carers allowance for that month? The Gov site is not very clear .

Lovely photos @Tulipandmagnolia .

@TheGoodCat currently the earnings threshold is £204 pw after tax, National Insurance and expenses.

If you earn more than that, you aren’t eligible, but can reapply if you become eligible again at a later date.

How fluctuating earnings are dealt with varies. A lack of consistency in how they are dealt with is part of why so many had overpayments. Sometimes earnings can be averaged out. If you are deemed to be over on some weeks but not others you can be paid for just some weeks and not others.

@Tulipandmagnolia Oooo fabulous photos I missed those. Glad DS coped and that you had a good time.

@inthequietofdawn thank you it’s not clear at all for fluctuating income which is a concern. I don’t want to be an overpayment person.

Or have to reapply ever other month. Not a very encouraging system for carers that want to attempt paid work.

@TheGoodCat you could always pay into a pension to ensure you are always under the threshold. This is what I do.

@inthequietofdawn i know they take 50% of pension contributions off of the earnings amount but I think this will still take me over. Could you put the whole of the earnings into a pension?

I’m trying to calculate the maximum pay per month:

Say £3,000 gross
£2,000 into pension
so that’s 50% of £2,000 = £1,000 + (£1,000 net) c£800 = £1,800

but I can’t work out the rough monthly gross that comes in under £204 weekly earnings minus tax, NI, pension & expenses

@TheGoodCat the standard annual allowance is £60k or 100% of earnings, whichever is lower.

I’m over thinking as I won’t earn £3,000 a month but it would be good to have an idea of the maximum as building up a carers allowance debt for going say £5 over and not noticing is a worry.

Thank you @inthequietofdawn my AA is reduced so I guess I can start my calculations from max £333 pension contributions a month so £161.51 discounted from earnings.

@inthequietofdawn do you just notify the carers allowance monthly of your net pay, pensions and expenses and let them crunch the figures?

Those figures were rubbish 😆 reduced AA is now £10k. Is my brain even fit for work….

I haven’t even applied for a job. I always want to work when it’s tough going. It will pass.

@TheGoodCat I’m not sure of the maximum. I suppose it depends on your expenses.

I know someone who earns over £400 pw and still qualifies because of what they contribute to a pension and their other expenses.

I work 15hrs pw TTO 39 weeks per year plus 5.6 holidays @ £20ph. I pay £192 into a pension to guarantee I am under all the time regardless of any other expenses. I send my pay slips whenever the carer’s allowance unit say to send them.

@inthequietofdawn thank you for sharing that has settled me. I doubt I could be away from DD long enough to earn over the £204 per week so it’s a bit of a moot point. I had an optimistic brain trundle through returning to work because I’m tired and work is relatively easy and would be one thing for me.