Anyone for a starting school in September thread?

[SmellyBill]

Anyone want to join me on a starting school ramble?

DS1 (4.9 dx ASD) is starting (mainstream primary) school in September. He has a statement (though I'm not entirely convinced it is any good but IPSEA and others have told me I will lose at tribunal so not pursing it). He's been for a couple of taster sessions and enjoyed it but is refusing to even try the school uniform on and is adamant he won't be wearing it. As he has been so good on the settling sessions the class teacher doesn't think he has any difficulties . She is in for a shock!

That's us - what about you and yours

ds starting sept on SA+, his excited about it, but not been there yet, bar school fair! scared stiff for him;. had fab pre-schoool, bit 1:1 and loads of extra attention, hope all his peers are into gogo's, star wars and doc who! oh and rules and time!

DJangel, i think being such a transitional time, it is a time that that brings things to the forefront of your thoughts, a worrying time, but you have to know and try that she can be with others.

I love ds so much, my little me, but also so hard and just not be there, don't feel guilty its just the way it is sometimes

can I join ds starts school in September in speech unit, but goes straight into year 1
as when moved they had no school places and he is not 5 to middle of this month
so sent him to fab sn nursery ran by mencap not Lea

Am having kittnes because there saying they cant do the ot thats in his statement and that they think ds might need to move placemenst due to his pd

EvieBaby - I've seen posts on here which say cos Teachers & TA's have non-contact time it is hard to get cover put in for breaks etc. DS1's specialist teacher is adamant that the school must use the hours where they are most needed and for him that should include breaks (he is able to work independently for an hour or so a day). She has experience from the other side of the table IYGWIM and her advice was to keep saying to the school "you have the hours of support there - use them". Best to check with your school and LEA if it looks like it could be a sticking point.

DJAngel - glad the MS session went o.k. Hope the SN school one does too and that you can work out an acceptable transition for your DD. Sorry you're feeling wobbly, I'm finding the whole school stuff is bursting the little bubble we exist in. Please don't blame yourself over attachment issues, your DD's needs are what they are and all you can do as a mum of a young child is respond to them imo. Trying not to could well have made her more anxious. Hopefully she will be well supported in her schooling and the transition will go as best as it can.

takemesomewheresunny - Hi. Glad your DS is looking forward to school, I'm sure there will be plenty of children with similiar interests.

roundthebend4 - hello! eek at the OT issue - are they just panicking at the prospect do you think? Hope you get it smoothed out, I've seen some of your posts and know you have put a lot into getting him in to the unit. Fingers crossed for you

Hanging belly fingers crossed person they employ is fully trained ds did term in ms before we moved and they used one if their own Lsa and as nice as she was she did not have a clue what she should do

Smellybill

think it's only now that they have spoken to ds rather fab nursery that there realising just how much mire help that ds will need above the speech.
Ds. Is going into y1. As one if the youngest not 5 to middle of this month but I'd unable to read or even hold a pen stilll has odd accident needs help getting on of the toilet etc

Hello all, can I join in too? DS is 4 starting at a unit for children with ASD. He is very worried about school, so we are trying to talk up the things he likes. We have the uniform and he has tried it on. If we talk about school though, he gets very upset. Taster sessions start soon, so hoping that will help and not put him off completely.

Better than me ds still struggles to get dressed because of hid pd and it says dc must wear shies can do themselves plus indoor pumps ,

ds can't wear pumps as wears afos and do himself ekk he wears piedro boots on top of

Hi all

We've all got such different issues going on haven't we but we're all trying our best to prepare our kids for what will change in different ways.. Smelly Bill you're right about it bursting a bubble we've been in..it will be so strange.

Just got back from visit to the SN school and it was a really mixed experience.

It was just an hour but I think she liked the environment. Lots of outdoor equipment to play with and we also had a nice play in the garden and in the ball pool which she loved!

There were 6 kids in the class and 2 staff, 1 teacher and 1 LSA who was with one child needing 1-1 all the time. I was a disappointed with this ratio, having just fought so hard for 1-1 at the MS setting and having been told they don't specify 1-1 at SN setting as staff student ratio so high anyway. Felt dd could easily get overlooked and get into mischief/ be unsafe or not be heard if she's trying to communicate something.. She just uses occasional one word communications often very quietly or she screams in protest so I just have to hope she does some screaming if she needs something..

Really gutted though coz don't want to have to start complaining already. Haven't said anything about it. Is this ratio normal? It's a class all moderate or severe learning disability. Left me feeling worried though..

Other than that it went well and they seemed flexible about us having lots of visits til she's feeling more at home but it's clear they want her to be ok on her own asap.. but that makes sense I guess.. I'd rather she settle quickly with minimum distress too..

Hi

My dd starts SN school in September, we've been going this term for one morning then two but I've not left her yet. Her place is funded full time from September but we're going to aim for three mornings with me leaving for an hour by November half term, it's going to take a long time. She's really enjoyed when we've been so far but I never leave her so that's the bit I'm worried about.

DJAngel- We were told SN school don't do 1-1 unless there is a trachy or similar, dds class has 8 children and 5 members of staff, there are a variety of SN PMLD/SLD mostly.

My DS will soon be leaving his SEN language unit (he goes there p/t and p/t MS nursery).

I so wish he could stay there.
But it's only a small unit located on the grounds of a MS infant school, and they only take 3 to 5 y.olds.
The staff in there have been brilliant and they care about the children in there, they really know DS well and know how to work best with him. With the high-staff small pupil ratio he has made progress since for the last year.
I'm so so sad he is soon leaving (had a few tears over it silly old me!)... and statement or not, deep down i know there is no way he will ever get the same level of attention in a MS setting.

I want to get the teachers and SALTs a lovely goodbye presie from DS but don't know what...??? any ideas welcome.

i got our portage worker a present to help the kids, as i know they always struggle to get new toys/activities as near enough money and a persnalised card of ds using moonpig.

can ds not stay at the lang unit till jan (does not have to go FT to school till then)

Thanks TakeMSS, for the idea.

No, i've asked his placement ends at the end of the month.
Even if they'd say yes they'd have to run it through past the SEN panel first and if they would be likely to say no as DS has recently been dx with autism (as well as speech and lang. disorder)

But one of the SALT from the unit will continue to see DS at school, but the provision will be very different to the help he gets at the unit now.

Can I join please. Great idea and nice to share experiences (good & bad!).
My DS 4.0 ASD starts fulltime Reception in Sept at MS school. He already attends the nursery for 2 hours and this has been a fantastic transition. Staff have been brilliant.Statement in place (25 hours) so only worry at moment is toilet training which am planning to start as soon as hols begin.

thederkinsdame - hello. Hope the taster sessions ease your DS's anxieties - we find DS1 gets quite anxious when we try and explain things in advance but when it comes to it he is fine.

roundthebend4 - I'm sure the unit will allow the necessary adjustments to uniform etc for your DS. Hope the OT stuff gets sorted out for you asap.

BobLoblaw - hi. Hope the transition continues to go well for you both.

DJAngel - glad the SN school was open to a gradual transition - hope the staffing no's work out o.k.

Genie- no idea on presents for staff. I have been wracking my brains - don't want to go over the top (can't afford to either) but don't want to end up giving junk IYKWIM. I'm thinking standard mini-bottles of wine for all staff then a nice box of chocs for his 1:1. Not v original tho!

overthebar - hello. Glad the transition is going well - hope the toileting does too.

We had our TAC today and got a few things sorted out which I had been obsessing concerned about. Class teacher had originally said DS1 HAD to do fulltime hours from the start. It seems she was told cos DS1 stipulates full hours (though it's not 100%) he had to go fulltime.
Specialist Teacher said that it was fine to use the hours he wasn't there as prep time for him so can legit keep LSA on premises and paid. So now he will start a few days later and just til lunchtime then review after a week to see if we can shift him to staying for lunch then finally all day. They are also putting him in gym trial class that starts same time school does she he won't have to deal with cloakroom chaos, and it should help his balance and co-ordination too. No magic bullet for school uniform, usual visual stuff suggested which I will try but it tends to leads ot more resistance but I can but try. He did manage another whole day in his school top but I did have to leave him wailing at preschool about it, but tbh he is not happy there atm so any excuse to wail will do!

right, I need to start sorting out clothes for our trip to Thomasland!

We've just had our first settling in and he was great. Shoved me out the door! It's the first of a few and I am sure we will have good days and bad days, but I am pleased that he enjoyed the first one. He even said he preferred it to nursery.

Just had chat with transport and as ds can't get himself into a car without someone giving him a hoik there giving him WAV transport so any luck that means quicker journeys goes out to tender this week and will meet them bwfor hand so they can meet ds

We have chance to see new school and fit him to spend hr in it but sigh means were going to have to leave home really stupid o'clock because ds can't do the underground all for one hr am thinking that maybe better to wait to Srptember as ds will have firgotten by then anyway .then got to explain in the first 10 days of school ds going to be absent for 4 of them due to important check ups

Tis I, SmellyBill.

Thederkinsdame - woohoo for settling in session going so well!

roundthebend4 - glad the transport stuff has been worked out. Sounds like a lot of faff for the sake of an hour, I would be tempted to leave it til September too.

I've had the TAC minutes through and I am amazed at some of things it says I said so will need to amend them and send them back. They have at least referred to me by my first name rather than "mum" . Hope they have been reading my posts on MN!

Hi, I think I need this thread (or a looking for a school in Sept thread).

DD has GDD, very little language and at nearly 4 is more like a 2 year-old so far as understanding her environment is concerned. She's in a fantastic nursery at the moment so I know what good inclusive provision looks like.

We are moving to another London borough and have so far been to visit all four schools within 20 min journey of our new home.
Three schools have been out and out negative, talking about how much it will cost to have DD and how changing nappies is going to be a problem. It sounds like if we applied to any of the three they would try their hardest to argue that they could not have her because they don't have the resources and it would therefore affect the education of the other children!

I was shocked to hear at one school that there was NOBODY who used Makaton. Not a single member of staff! And their attitude was , if it's not something available in the school then they don't have to provide it.

The 4th school wsan't perfect but they did at least have a clue about what to do with DD.

I always thought I wanted her in mainstream but am worried that the schools I have visited just don't have a clue how to educate her--and I don't have confidence that anyone with the right experience is going to deliver the day to day care she needs to keep her safe. So I am going to visit the special school next week and then make an appointment to see the SN team and kick some ass.

This thread is for us too. DS1 is starting foundation stage 1(pre reception) in Sept when he will have just turned 4. Not in uk so whole system is different. Only just had dx of mild ASD. We haven't told the school anything as 1) up till now everyone has told us he isn't ASD but just a lang disorder if anything and 2) the schools are all private and therefore can decide not to offer a place for whatever reason they like.
Now trying to decide when to tell school and what exactly to say. So far he's coped fine in nursery but obviously big school is very different. We are leaning now to speaking to school when he's been there a few weeks to give him a chance to see how he gets on. The HUGE thing for us is that there is NO alternative. The other so called options are a special needs centre for children with severe special needs or wait 3 years and move 1 1/2 hrs away to a town with a school that would suit but only starts in grade 2. We have chosen a school that has a SENCO and will be affiliated to London Childrens Clinic as of September so are hoping for the best. Else you'll be seeing a thread saying where in the UK is good for ASD support in schools.

Am intrigued about where you live--are all the schools private in the whole country?

Arabica depening where you want worth putting shout out another mumsnetter might be able steer you towards better schools.

There been wmergency meeting calle dofr the 15th July as school struggling with how much extra help ds going to need thats not funded (just funded for speech unit placement)

roundthebend4, we also have an emergency review on the 15th! Will keep my fingers crossed for you too

ds1 is starting reception in sept, he will be 4 years and 2 weeks old when he starts . He has a speech disorder and will have a statement but is going into ms. roundthebend sorry to hear about the troubles you are having.

I'd forgotten we had a dedicated thread

I went to the Special school for DD1 on Friday. They were lovely, and the meeting covered everything from transport to transistion.

DD1 is going to be in a class of 10 children, with 4 staff. Like DJAngel, I was a little surprised at the ratio, and wobbled a lot!

I spoke to the head and said that I am sure they know what they are doing, but am a little concerned that DD1 has 1:1 at pre-school and they are really struggling with her. But the head was great. She said that the environment is inherently safer at SS, and that DD1 will get lots of individual time, and some group time, etc.

We went to her classroom, and there were 3 children in the classroom with 2 staff. Apparently the other children from the class had gone to the softplay room. It was reassuring. Also, the linked bathroom had a bolt fitted, which the teacher explained was because one of their children likes to play with doors and taps. DD1 is exactly like that, so it was great to see that they had modified the environment to suit.

They have 3 resident SALTS, which is fantastic. Slightly less OT and physio, but DD1 has already been flagged for assessment for sensory needs by the headteacher, as her sensory profile is quite extreme.

The Head is convinced DD1 is ADHD, which I would agree with in presentation, and is mindful of that with regards to her 'plan' for DD. She said it really doesn't matter that she doesn't have an ADHD dx, because they deal with the need not the dx.

Transport came around, and have noted that DD1 is a runner with no sense of danger, and needs a 5-point harness. She said that if DD1 goes on a minibus, they will just cut holes in the seat fabric to allow the 5-point harness through She said that all things are possible.

So now, we wait for a phone call at some point in the next few weeks to arrange a home visit in September, then she will start part-time after then, building to full-time within the first half-term.

I have to endure 8 weeks of DD1 saying (all day) 'can I go to school now?). She is not coping well with the waiting

Arabica - Hi. That really is shocking over the schools attitudes. I expect once the LEA starts talking to them they would dial down their negativity a bit but can appreciate you would not want to send your DD to them. I hope you find a suitable placement.

Ellie4 - Hi. Hope school works out well for your DS1, must be extra daunting with lack of alternatives. Fingers crossed for you.

Roundthebend & bigcar - hope the reviews go well.

Bettyswoobies - Hi. aw I'm sure your son will be fussed a lot by the older children.

Lougle - the school sounds excellent, especially about dealing with need not the dx. Good luck with the 8 week wait, I still have my head in the sand that preschool is ending this week!

I need to get the TAC meeting minutes amended as it has a few errors about things I said which I didn't . They have at least used my actual name rather than "mum". Hope they haven't been reading MN!