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Complaint Panel Hearing been set - does anyone have any advice please?

49 replies

Chocol8 · 20/06/2005 21:15

The complaint panel hearing has eventually been set for 27th June.

I'm trying to get IPSEA to support me, but I can't get through!!! If anyone has any hints or advice about this, please can you reply as I am very nervous about it. Thank you

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coppertop · 20/06/2005 21:31

No advice but I just wanted to wish you luck while simultaneously bumping this up.

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Davros · 21/06/2005 10:06

Blimey Choc! Have you tried the NAS Advocacy svs? I have been reading a lot recently about how much easier they are to access than IPSEA and very good when you do. Not putting IPSEA down, they just seem hard to get through to. Is there anyone locally who could support you? I would be shitting myself (very helpful)

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amynnixmum · 21/06/2005 11:01

Would your local parent partnership be available? I found the lady that ran mine to be a godsend. Good luck.

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Chocol8 · 21/06/2005 17:29

I haven't heard of the NAS advocacy service Davros - I did send a copy of my letter to Neil McConachie of the NAS, but have heard nothing yet, but did speak to his secretary last week.

PP did support me for one of my original meetings, but were not of much use. I do speak regularly to a lady there who is very knowledgeable, but although she can offer to send along a parent advisor, none of them has experience of a complaint hearing - I don't want to lose on a technicality, so would prefer to hang out for an experienced bod.

I did get through to IPSEA today (fanfare sounds) and the lady was brilliant - an absolute mine of information. I have the bear bones of what I can say and also will quote to them from the 1996 Education Act (which I have to get a copy of sharpish) to show they are in breach under paragraph 323/661 and 662 (will check this out and take copies). She thinks i have serious enough grounds to receive an apology from the Governing body...!

Davros - this time next week, I will be "shitting myself" - and rather helpfully, I am due that day so bound to be in unspeakable pain, the fun just never stops!.

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maddiemo · 21/06/2005 18:07

No advice Chocl8, but hope it works out well. It is right that people should be brought to task, otherwise certain schools will just keep on treating SN children in an unacceptable manner.

I will send lots of good vibes to you on the 27th.

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Merlot · 21/06/2005 18:10

No advise chocol8, but also wanted to let you know that I'll be thinking of you on the 27th - hope it goes well

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KarenThirl · 22/06/2005 06:45

Sending lots of positive vibes for the 27th. Try to stay focused!

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coppertop · 26/06/2005 12:02

Good luck for tomorrow, Choc.

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Chocol8 · 26/06/2005 12:17

Thank you for your good wishes ladies, it just goes to show that i'm getting a little stressed as I put the wrong date on my post - it is actually Wed 29th not the 27th! Sorry.

I am going to my sister's (my witness) to make even more notes to use at the meeting, and have just been on the phone to a friend who has an autistic ds who has some experience of the system.

I just need to remember to stay calm, although I now have an opening passage: "...we wouldn't be here today if I had received a satisfactory response to my original letter of complaint".

Hugs needed if you can spare a few please!

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mumeeee · 26/06/2005 15:59

Good luck for Wednesday.

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Davros · 26/06/2005 20:37

Oh god Choc, //[[[[hugs]]] from me!! I think preparing and writing things down will just help you get your thoughts in order and I think your opening line is perfect. Hope we can celebrate on the 6th July when its behind you.

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coppertop · 26/06/2005 21:07

Have a few hugs from me and lots of extra good luck for Wednesday. xx

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Chocol8 · 26/06/2005 21:58

Awww, cheers Davros and Coppertop! They were lovely hugs!

I have been making more notes and I have just sent the clerk of the governors my original letter, the chair of govs reply and the diary of bullying incidents.

I did say I would precis the letter with my main concerns, but have replied that my letter is consise and to the point and I would hope that they would be able to see why I felt it necessary to take this further in view of the response I received.

I will arm myself with plenty of ammo in the shape of letters and reports, but my main "weapon" is that I have asked my ds's class assistant (who looked after ds and another boy with Autism for two school years). She was moved when the new head came into the job, and later made redundant a few days before Christmas.

She is very willing to give her thoughts and state for the record that she found being moved a particularly bad idea for my ds and the other boy, especially as both their behaviours deteriorated pretty quickly in her absence.

I need to make notes on the bullying part of my complaint, but in view of the Bullying Policy, they are actually in breach of it, pretty much at every turn.

Thanks again for your lovely hugs. x

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Chocol8 · 27/06/2005 21:26

Well I received a copy of 25 (yes 25) pages prepared by the headteacher - and guess what...a large majority of it is lies...not that I should be surprised, but I could barely function today because I was so distraught.

They are trying to make me out to be a completely over emotional mother to her "naughty" son.

I went through with a blue highlighter and highlighted all the lies and there is ALOT of blue ink. I have been advised to bring this up in my summing up at the end and also ask the head what she will gain by lying so blatently. I HAVE to ask her, I cannot just let her get away with it.

My ds's old class assistant has been round tonight and looked through my letter, the response and the 25 pages of lies - she is so looking forward to sorting the bag out on Wednesday! My sister, friend and I will agree to be nothing but professional and courteous at the meeting and then come out and swear all over the place (at least I started my period today, and not on Wednesday, phew!)...one less thing to worry about!

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Davros · 27/06/2005 21:52

Bloody hell Choc, I hope you get her good! She must think she can get away with it somehow.

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TheRealMrsF · 27/06/2005 21:57

I am so sorry to have missd this...but glad i'm in time to wish you good luck!!

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coppertop · 27/06/2005 22:13

The cheek of the woman!

I'd be tempted to wear one of those Mother From Hell T-shirts that someone (Jimjams?) posted a link to.

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jayzmummy · 27/06/2005 23:16

Choc.. all I can add is stand your ground, hold your head up high and look that woman in the eye when you ask her why she feels the need to cover her inability to meet the needs of a child with a recognised disability, with lies.

You know where I am.

Sending massive

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Chocol8 · 27/06/2005 23:41

Awww, cheers guys - I am feeling alot more positive now and hopefully i'll sleep tonight and tomorrow!

I was thinking that what i'll do at the meeting is prop up a little picture of my ds to give me confidence and make me feel strong.

I warn you now, I may be back for some more hugs tomorrow...! Like the idea of the Mother from Hell t-shirt - although they obviously think I am already!

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Davros · 28/06/2005 07:28

I think taking a photo is a really good idea. I've done this before at LEA meetings, its just tucked in my plastic file of papers etc, they can all see it though without me showing it to them. Yes, this child is a REAL person!

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Chocol8 · 28/06/2005 17:44

[tremble emoticon]

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coppertop · 28/06/2005 18:16

Good luck, Choc. I hope you show her that she can't just tell lies like that and hope to get away with it. Grrrr!

You'll have to imagine virtual versions of us all standing behind you and cheering you on.

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Chocol8 · 28/06/2005 18:35

That's a really lovely idea Coppertop - i'll do that. There are papers all around the house and I still have such alot to do. Until I am FULLY confident that I have all the info that I can stuff in my tiny mind, then I will not relax.

I have just heard in reply to me bringing the class assistant, the head is bringing the SEN advisor from the LEA as a witness! Hopefully she will be getting jittery...

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maddiemo · 28/06/2005 19:08

Hugs and more hugs. Will think of you tomorrow.

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JakB · 28/06/2005 19:37

Chocol, [{{{{{hugs}}}}} Blimey, my love, I've got everything crossed for you. Imagine the opposition in the nude. I've no idea how these things go (and it looks as if I will deffo be at my own soon) but I remember from my days on a dead 'ard trade mag that I used to use steely eye contact, be ultra polite at all times and often use silence whilst I collected my thoughts (used to really unnerve people).
But then that was about the state of the knicker industry. If it was about DD I'd probably bawl...

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