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Original poster

Anyone else want to moan about how hard it is with their dc?

66 replies

Blossomhill · 24/04/2009 17:13

I have just had it today really. Sick to death of all the hard work that goes with parenting dd. She is just so challenging and it's getting harder as she gets older. I kow it's not usually the done thing here but honestly I really do feel like I have had enough

OP posts:
saintlydamemrsturnip · 24/04/2009 20:40

Well yes. Either that or she thinks I am cracking up

nikos · 24/04/2009 21:23

Blossonhill-I came on here tonight feeling exactly like your OP so thank you for starting this thread.
My mum has been staying this week and we have kept ds off school (he has asd) to try and toilet train him. She has largely been looking after him and I've been seeing to my other two (NT) children. With just these 2 to look after life has been so much less of a struggle and I could RELAX for a bit. But it has left me realising how big an impact ds has on our lives. I think I'd been so used to it I hadn't noticed. But life is just a daily struggle, some of them small struggles, but the constancy of it is so unfair and wearing.
Despondancy does nothing I know but it is good to throw it around in the open every now and again.

stillenacht · 24/04/2009 21:33

welcome NK etc etc

GlastonburyGoddess · 24/04/2009 21:37

Yes please. I was nr to tears on return from dropping ds off yesterday.before school whilst i was making his packed lunch he climbed up and got my iron(which is always usually in high cuboard) which id ironed my trousers for work with and taken into living room, plugged in and proceeded to burn three massive holes in the carpet, then took into my bedroom and burnt one in there.

we then had huge meltdowns in the evening due to changing from pampers pullups(are cutting into him)to huggies pj pants

Its just so relentless and exhausting always being on your toes and never knowing what theyre going to do or how theyre going to react to something.

today he irrupted immediately on leaving school before we'd even left the playground and carried on till we got home and he raged for about 15mins then fell asleep for and nrly two hrs.

some days it just makes me want to walk out

stillenacht · 24/04/2009 21:45

oh gg. i know how you feel ((((((hugs)))))) - it is utterly relentless with very little reward. i said to my best friend last night everyday i ask him how he has got on at school when he comes off the bus...and everyday greeted by no response. It breaks your heart over and over....

Original poster
Blossomhill · 24/04/2009 22:29

niko and gg yes I too have felt that feellike walking out the door emotion many times. Just getting ready for school is a huge ordeal and by 8.30 I am totally drained.
nikos I know exactly what you mean as my nt ds is a walk in the walk literally but I feel bad as he often gets pushed to the side because dd takes up so much of my time. gg how did you react to the carpet? I don't know what I would have done tbh although dd has done similar just not the same. I think it's the meltdowns too and constantly trying to find out what the problem is when dd really does not find it all easy to tell me how she feels.

Right a virtual (I am having a real one ) glass of wine for all of us!

OP posts:
Original poster
Blossomhill · 24/04/2009 22:55

stillenacht yes I get that too it's so so hard. Dd cannot tell me about her day at all even though she has the speech and language nowadays to do it.

OP posts:
stillenacht · 24/04/2009 22:57

I burst into tears in the pub with best friend last night about it and she had a little cry too - was nice tho love my best friend ((((((hugs)))))) blossomhill

Original poster
Blossomhill · 24/04/2009 23:08

that's nice that you have someone to talk to I was saying to dd's senco how cruel dd's sn are as you don't realise until they are 18 months + and it is like a smack in the mouth isn't it?

OP posts:
stillenacht · 24/04/2009 23:17

yes - everyone presumes i knew about it during pg (how that would make it 'better' i don't know)...the first question anyone asks is "Did you find out when you were pregnant" errr no, and how would that make it any different anyway...people do say silly things....

i guess for me i knoew something was 'wrong' or should i say 'different' (to be pc) withi him when he started having fits at 9 months but i had just got me head around the epilepsy and then WHAM autism smacked me round the head with a recurring breeze block.

Original poster
Blossomhill · 24/04/2009 23:21

winds me up people's ignorance and oh I couldn't do what you do
God yes a double dx is hard. Dd is the same it took so long to get her dx because she is complex, great!

OP posts:
stillenacht · 24/04/2009 23:23

yes that whole special kids for special people shite - we talked about that on the other thread last week i think-i really hate it but i know some carers of SN children like it so i guess its horses for courses really

(((((hugs)))))) matey

Original poster
Blossomhill · 24/04/2009 23:29

Yeah hugs to you too thanks {{{}}}

It annoys me because does it mean my nt ds isn't special and I find it patronising because what choice do I have and given half a chance some days I'd run a mile, seriously...

OP posts:
stillenacht · 24/04/2009 23:30

exactly matey

PheasantPlucker · 25/04/2009 00:04

Blossomhill, can you escape for a bit tomorrow, and just get some time to yourself, even an hour?

NK253624b6X11aeb19d0e3 · 25/04/2009 00:50

Riven - hello. Nice to know there are others out there doing this crazy diet. I need a T shirt or sign to say yes this food looks awful but actually I am doing the best for my child. Yes they are US and pollyanna and christians (hope I haven't offended anyone). Thanks for the welcome Stillenacht - how do I stop being NK6868v585 etc...?

You obviously all know each other well but no doubt I'll witter away to you now and again. Blossomhill - hope you get some respite tomorrow. It's just so bloody relentless. Often think about just walking out my front door and walking and walking.

NK253624b6X11aeb19d0e3 · 25/04/2009 00:57

Riven are you in Bristol? I'm in Bath.

Phoenix4725 · 25/04/2009 02:26

and then you add in the not sleeping because they are not and everything seems even harder

sarah293 · 25/04/2009 07:38

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn

TotalChaos · 25/04/2009 07:45

hello and welcome NK lots of numbers!

BH - do you still get the "oh but it's normal for them not to talk about their day at school" shit? I even get that crap from DS's teachers!

PheasantPlucker · 25/04/2009 09:14

Hello all

NK253624b6X11aeb19d0e3 · 25/04/2009 11:08

Riven - yes of course - would love to meet. I have a feeling from reading your previous posts that we share the same dietician (at Southmead? - would love to talk about that....) How old is your dd? My ds is 7 (older than some of the children here?)on the diet as a treatment (only treatment) for Glucose Type 1 Transporter Deficiency Syndrome (GLUT 1). Am assuming your dd is on for intractable epilepsy? Do you ever come to Bath (yes I am being lazy). Or.....this is better - am taking ds for a DXA scan at the BRI on Tues 19 May at 10.20am - that any good? Do you work? Have mil funeral Monday so lots of additional stress at the mo. Off to Crewe for it this w/e. Trying to work out how I stop being NK lots of numbers....

stillenacht · 25/04/2009 11:21

hi pp

TinySocks · 25/04/2009 13:03

Blossomhill. Thank you for starting this thread. I haven't been on mumsnet much but recently everytime I login I seem to only find threads about how life is okay, it's not a big deal, everyone is happy, I was starting to think I am the only one finding it really hard at times.

PheasantPlucker · 25/04/2009 13:08

[waving and beaming at stillenacht] !!