Taking a break from posting

[amber32002]

After recent events elsewhere on mumsnet, mumsnet have suggested I take a break from posting for a while to see if I can recover a bit, just in case anyone is looking for me.

[Fleurlechaunte]

[alfiemama]

perhaps sn should be safely behind closed doors, like them Moldies but then how do you educate peoples ignorance of disabilities if behind closed doors, however think mnhq would like that.

[JustineMumsnet]

Just to clarify this folks - we often quietly suggest to those few people who write to us telling us that MN is making them upset or miserable that they take a little break - we're here to make parents' lives easier, not the reverse, and often we've found that folks benefit from a bit of distance and come back happier and with renewed vigour.

But we certainly haven't and wouldn't insist that Amber takes a break. It's completely her choice.

Best,
MNHQ

[amber32002]

No, I'd made it quite clear that you hadn't insisted on it, Justine. It hasn't made our lives as parents of children with a disability 'easier' to have the things said about disability, to be honest. Not at all.

[kettlechip]

Amber, I think you've got every right to feel distressed by those horrid threads but I honestly can't see how you leaving MN will help. MN is the richer for you being on here. I can genuinely say that whenever I've come across you on a thread I've found your posts to be compassionate, helpful and insightful.

Please just hide those kind of threads and stay with us on here!

[MannyMoeAndJack]

I read that thread. Your posts were very well done - and you were up against it, to say the least.

You are a valuable asset to M/N, I hope you decide to keep posting.

[PeachyBAHonsPRSCertOnRequest]

' don't want them educated to think it's just as good to have a deaf child or child without legs who are just different?. ?. '

[misscutandstick]

SO! thats decided then, you'll stop here with us nice, educated, and thoughtful peeps instead!

[5inthebed]

So are you staying Amber? Are you are you are you???? Please do, we all value your input in so many ways

And as for that Super race thread I never read past the first page, but those comments you highlighted are disgraceful!

[Countingthegreyhairs]

I think your outrage is totally justified Amber.

I'm all for free speech but if the comments quoted by you at 11.51.23 had been directed at another section of society such as homosexual men or Welsh women for example, then surely they would have - quite rightly -been banned for being homophobic or racist?

Or are those sorts of views allowed to stand on Mumsnet as well (genuine question)?

Mumsnet towers do a fantastic job but I think the response "take a little break" is a bit patronising in these circumstances tbh.

[Seuss]

Hope you're going to stay Amber.

[improvingslowly]

would agree that you are a voice of great wisdom... pls stay.

[2shoes]

are you staying??????????????????????(fingers crossed)

[amber32002]

Never quite sure what to do when there's compliments

Firstly, I'm no better nor worse than anyone else here, and I have learned SO much from everyone, so the compliments are really nice but undeserved, ...but thank you

Secondly, I'm not outraged. I'm sad, I'm exhausted, I felt very humiliated on that thread, but I can't bear to see people who are really struggling having their lives made worse for public entertainment, and that's so much what it feels like on that thread. People with disabilities or those caring for them often have the most terrible time in society anyway, thanks to prejudice, ignorance, lack of facilities, lack of support and lack of money. I just don't see it as entertainment or a healthy discussion to have a complete free-for-all without any editorial input. But I'm not cross, I'm just really sad and very tired.

The 'tired' will sort itself out. The 'sad' I need help with from mumsnet, because I don't understand. And I guess they don't realise that this is really big problem for people with a learning/cognitive disability, because they're used to dealing with people who are NT not ASD, so applied "NT rules" to solving the problem. But it really doesn't help to suggest that I leave my friends and their support for a while when friendships are so very, very hard to come by when you're ASD.

And thank you to everyone who's cared about everyone on that thread.

[improvingslowly]

also meant to say that it was wrong what had been written elsewhere.

[BriocheDoree]

Amber, I think that is your most salient point: "they're used to dealing with people who are NT not ASD, so applied "NT rules" to solving the problem".

[coppertop]

Those posts are allowed to stay??!!

I'm nodding away at Countingthegreyhairs' post and agreeing with every word of it.

I hope you decide to stay, Amber.

[HelensMelons]

Amber

I was shocked when I opened this thread.

I don't think mnhq realise the trauma that can be experienced by either a person with a disability living and managing in today's society or, as I am, a parent of a child with a disability who strives for acceptance, respect and equality.

It's really beyond decency that such a revolting thread isn't removed.

Amber, without doubt, you have been one of the most helpful and insightful posters in this sn section. I have found your 'day in the life of amber' and all the other little snippets of your life that you share really wonderful. They have helped me, not only come to terms with my own son's asd, they have been informative and educational - but also give me hope that his future can be good - just as good as his siblings.

You are always honest and generous in your posting - that is hard to come by.

I hope you stay.

[Shells]

I hope you stay too. SN is a haven. It should be for you too.

[UniS]

See you for tea and muffins later amber? UniS

[whitenoise]

amber, to answer your question earlier, i do think you should stay on MN. But i would "take a break" from the rest of the board, so stay on SN where, i am guessing, you feel safe at the mo. Venture out when you feel you can.

I can understand the response from MNHQ about suggesting taking a break but it seems like almost an auto response. Yes sometimes that is the answer but i don't think it is in this case.

I can't see me staying on the main boards on MN much longer (have already namechanged to step away a bit)

[bullet123]

I'm sorry you're taking a break Amber. If you're not happy leaving then you shouldn't feel pushed into doing so.
Thank you for posting so eloquently on the threads in question.

[bubblagirl]

ive only just seen your thread amber you have helped me alot and thank you for putting your views across so well havent read the other thread im afraid but to be honest steer clear of ill minded people

dont stay away too long xx

[kettlechip]

I was just thinking today that I haven't seen jimjams around for ages, does anyone know if she's left or just namechanged?

Apologies for hijack Amber!