Weirdly, there's huge parallels between the things I respond to, and the things that horses do. Worth getting Temple Grandin's book, Thinking in Pictures, which talks a lot about the differences in how a reasonable number of those with an ASD see and sense the world.
Horses treat every new thing with suspicion. They treat things with suspicion even if they've seen them before. They can't bear being looked at directly or anyone moving fast and unexpectedly round them. They like to know routine. They rear up if a fly lands on them, but apparently don't mind huge heavy weights on them that much. They are calmed down with repetitive deep pressure or thick rugs over them. They can see patterns in things humans can't, and hear things humans can't. (Well, except that I can too.)
A house can be a nightmare. Perfumes, aftershaves, room sprays, air fresheners, bleach, low-energy flickering lighting, people talking, traffic noise, aircraft noise, tv noise, rough textures, painfully rough or tight-feeling clothing and shoes, sudden changes of routine, unexpected events, phones going, newspapers arriving with a thud...it's like being in the Battle of the Somme. But other people wouldn't even notice a thing.
Sometimes behaviour problems happen when a child has tried for a long time to get away from all of this, to make the pain stop, and they can't. And we don't even know which bits hurts the most so we can tell you about it. We don't have the words or common sense to know how to explain it.