Do you ever have those moments when you suddenly realise that your DC isn't "normal"...?

[BriocheDoree]

This isn't a negative post, just an odd experience today. Bumped into DD's SALT in the supermarket with her three kids. Youngest is DD's age. They were all chattering away normally, and walking round with their mum without having to be put in the trolley so they wouldn't run off, and when it came to pay they were helping load / unload the trolley rather than climbing over the barriers, running up and down in front of the doors and jumping off the benches. And yet DD is so much better than she used to be! It's only when you see NT kids that you suddenly realise that maybe your's is a bit more like hard work sometimes. I'm not complaining, just made me think!

broiche, he doesn't have dx either. took him to GP this morning as i just cannot cope with his behaviour anymore and they told me its within "normal" for speech delay 3 yo.

DOn't know where to go now

Sorry to hear you're struggling BlueD. We have good days and bad days, but TBH reading some of the posts, DD is pretty easy. Perhaps because she's a girl? I don't know, but she doesn't have the big meltdowns. The key to so much of her behaviour seems to be sensory stimulation. At the moment she's at her most concentrated on a seesaw or doing playdoh! Hope you find something that helps your DS. Is there anything you can do to get him to work off excess energy - trampoline?

Not really. My ds is sooo SN that it's obvious, obvious, obvious!!! Although he looks facially and bodily 'normal', his body langauge gives him away in a flash!! He is so far away from being NT that comparing the two types is meaningless IYSWIM.

I notice 7-year-old ds's Aspergers when we have to do stuff like going to the shoe shop, which can reduce me to tears. It's the look on the face of the (very, very nice shoe fitting lady) when ds bursts into angry tears because I won't let him use the little stool with the slope for shoe fitting as a slide, that when she says 'are you enjoying the holidays' and he says 'yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yeah whatever' (last bit copied from hearing it on TV or something) and when she says 'now walk up and down' he jumps like a frog then runs to another stool to use it as a slide...
I remember once taking him and the woman said 'how old are you' and ds just absolutely blanked her, so I said '6' and she just looked astounded, and blurted out 'I thought he was much younger than THAT!' I always feel so depressed after optician, dentist, doctors and shoe shop appointments as his behaviour is so mad and impulsive and strange. And it makes me realise how much social interaction I avoid because of his behaviour.

shoe shop just like ds2.

who can i go to for proper assessment? GP dismissed him. HV? (notoriously useless but will be off on maternity leave possibly to be replaced by the efficient one)

MsDemeanor

You have my life!

Ds nearly 7, possible Aspergers, not yet diagnosed, possible adhd from cahms appointment today (though this had been ruled out last year) .

Simple tasks like shopping,going to the cinema (this was a new one cause i am forever the optimist but not anymore!) are completely horrendous! We went for shoes for dd1 4.5 and dd2 2.5 and ds flapped around the shoe shop, jumped, screamed and blanked anyone that spoke to him!

Today he has punched me in the face twice, spat at me and swore consistently in the waiting room for cahms appt, much to the horror of other people in the waiting room.

We now. i say we but generally it is me! avoid most social situations to the detrement of my wee girls i feel.

sorry so many people are having a tough time in the holidays.

TClang - I really feel for you and the depressing appointment scenario. NHS SALT is planning to do some % assessments on DS in September, not looking forward to that.

yes i do but now i wont let it bring me down as i see ihm do things others cant and it evens it out but some days makes me so sad

like when children walk beside there mum and are aware of the dangeras and the surroundings

when i see mum having conversation with her child

when children can understand what is asked of them

but then i have amazing moments with my ds and think i'm the luckiest mum in the whole world so why do i cry myself to sleep at night?

whenever we are around a child his age or younger and he just stands out his understanding is on another level but then i am so proud of how far he has come and how he copes with his little battles every day

and im so proud of how close we are

blue dragonfly, I don't know. I suggest going back to the GP with a list of things he does that aren't like other children, and say you really feel he needs a referral. Or talk to the school - get the Senco on board and go for a referral that way. YOu really need a developmental paediatrician. It's not a nice process but having a dx (and a bolshy parent!) really helps ds at school.
Ds is very up and down, especially at the moment. And so unpredictable. I think I've prepared him for every eventuality, but I never have!
It is extremely tiring.

I've had these type of moments since DS (3.6 GDD) was 4 months old. I try to mix with NT children because I want him to "socialise" so I see the differences all the time, but to be honest, it is getting easier. I have developed a nice thick skin and it doesn't get to me as much anymore.

What keeps me up at night these days is worrying about his future: will he make friends, will he get a job, will he be able to drive, will he accept himself, how will I keep bullies out of the way, will there come a time when he will stop opening/closing doors all the time, being interested in cartoons, ride a bike, the list goes on.