HElp im so cross and need to rant and scream

[bonkerz]

This is going to be a long post....is anyone around???

Yup.......post away, not saying i can help, but i will certainly try .

gwan...

Am around if you need a listening ear! Bit short on wisdom today but will try!

went to visit the school today that the LEA said would be perfect for DS and its SO not.
we went to visit this particular school and it became immediately apparent that this school was not a suitable environment for DS and would not meet Dss needs regardless of an enhanced package. This school did not fit the criteria that had been set. The schools intake is currently over 200 pupils and the class DS would be joining will be 32 pupils which is not a small group at all. The school itself was lovely but had no room for a withdrawal space/room to be used for Ben when he has his tantrums/meltdowns. Whilst the school have in the past had children who display similar behaviour problems as DS they have not been successful in educating them and have merely contained these children who have eventually moved onto special school. The one child they have there who has ASD is being managed but the head fears he is not having all his needs met and the parents of this child are also applying to a speical school.

Im so fucking cross that my day has been wasted.
A call the the LEA has revealed they know of NO other school that could help DS BUT they are STILL refusing to grant a special school for him and keep quoting ths ssame crap at me about peer groups!!! WHAT ISTHE POINT OF WORRYING ABOUT A PEER GROUP WHEN DSs BEHAVIOUR WILL ALIENATE ANY CHANCEW HE HAS OF MAKING FREIDNS ANYWAY!!!!!

I have to get all the paperwork in for the appeal by 30th MAy and am now arranging to go and look again at the local priory school.

I have talked to another special school in the next county who have expressed concern about taking DS becasue they have alot of partially sighted children there and would worry for their saftey as DS is aggressive.

I THINK i am going to name the priory as the school i would like DS to go to and hope that will forcew the LEA to look at this other special school if that makes sense. Either school would be lovely. Both are closer and priory is just up the road!

Im annoyed at ed psych as he has always agreed with LEA that DS can cope in MS BUT today the head at this new school said he had spoken to thier ed psych who has looked at DSs case and has told him that DS belongs in a special school and NOT MS!!!!!

god they are pissing you around. Don't bother visiting any schools without speaking to the head first, since the LEA are just seemingly picking schools at random as the ideal place.

the problem is TC is that the LEA have NO MORE schools for me to look at!!!

I thought that i would have a shortlist to choose from but after 4 weeks of looking for a MS school that fitted the criteria the case worker has only found 1 and TBH that one isnt going to work ata ll!

At the National Autistic Society meeting this week, one of their top people readily admitted that average school provision for any child with an ASD is 'appalling'. Fight for all you're worth for a school that will respect your child's needs.

I had to change our son's school four times over his entire school career so far (he's dyslexic), because two of them refused completely to help him and told us that he was basically just thick and badly behaved. One of them said they didn't help children with dyslexia as it disrupted their priorities (!) He's actually in the top 1% for IQ and was misbehaving because he was bored to tears.

What I notice about a lot of "provision" for children on the autistic spectrum is that schools so often dump them in a corner with a teaching assistant, whilst sat under scary flickering fluorescent lights in an overwhelmingly (to them) noisy and confusing room, wearing a school uniform that feels like torture to them because of hypersensitivity. Er, that's about it. Oh yes, and expect them to just cope with the socialisation "because it's good for them to learn to socialise by trying to join in", then wonder why they misbehave. Effectively they're torturing them.

A specialist school or a really well-structured quiet school with a caring head teacher is worth its proverbial weight in gold. I was lucky enough to find one when I was younger, or it would have been a very different story of my life so far.

I have just been on phone to IPSEA who are trying to get me some urgent support. They have said there is a possibility we can have a solicitor through them to help at the appeal in september and i cant wait to tell the Case worker that!!!!

Good! I hope you can get a solicitor and pronto!

Hi Bonkerz!
You have recorded eloquantly why the named ms is unsuitable and it sounds like the ht will say similar. I guess thats what you have to say in your urgent letter to them. At least your vist has armed you with these facts! I hope Ipsea can help you now.
Can you provide (evidence of potential) peer contact somehow to satisfy that augument? Presumably a specialised suitable enviroment will help reduce the stress levels and aggression - and peer contact may be more successful once ds is in a suitably skilled supportive school!

sorry i disappeared. I actually tried to contact case worker at SENA to be told she couldnt (wouldnt) speak to me. I saw red especially as she is on annual leave as of tomorrow and decided i had to speak to someone so got in the car and drove to county hall! I got there at 4.15pm to be told that case worker had left promptly at 4!!! I then accosted the first person from SENA i saw and blasted her ear off till 6.15. Anyway it looks like it may have paid off.

I have got her to agree to go back to panel on 16th June where they WILL grant special school placement. I have told her i am going to apply for the local priory school and have found out that whilst Leicester city council use the school and so do nottingham that Leicester county have reservations about the school mainly due to.......the peer group problem!!!

I have got numbers to ring for various after school groups and activity centers that DS can start to access which will put a stop to their argument about peer groups. i am going to see the priory school again tomorrow to get them to give me all the relevant paper work and they have agreed to accept DS.

I have arranged for the boss man at SENA to contact me ASAP to discuss my concerns i have with the case worker. I have also told the SENA lady that i believe the LEA are failing to make reasonable arrangements to ensure DSs disability related needs are met whilst he is at the PRU and that i believe that not only are they breaking te law by not providing DS with the things detailed on his statement but that i also believe he is a victim of disibility discrimination by the LEA and that unless his statement is implemented immediately at the PRU i will file a complaint.

I was very harsh, i was very emotional, i stuck to the facts, i expressed my complete lack of trust and confidence i have in my current case worker and i made it known that i will fight till the death to get my son everything he needs and deserves.

Im not sure if all these things will be followed up BUT TBH the lady i spoke to seemed just as bewildered and concerned as i was and i just hope that she is true to her word to ring me tomorrow!

Well done! Very impressive!

Fingers crossed for you bonkers

P.S dont suppose youll come with me to our SENDIST

i will come with you twocutedarlings!

Im all fired up now. have written a 5 page letter detailing 3 options i feel viable for DS one is the private expensive school, one is the less expensive other county school and one would mean adjusting the whole admission criteria to accept DS!!!! I have quoted DDA and pointed out DSs statement is a legal document and that it has not been implemented at all since being issues in FEB. I plan to take it to county hall tomorrow and watch them squirm!

Well done Bonkerz!

Good luck Bonkers, id love to see the look on there faces when you walk in tomorrow .

not feeling so great today, I was so fired up yesterday but this morning i just feel like giving up. I syupidly watched a documentry on BBC4 yesterday and its hit homw how bad DS is and how much help and support he really does need.
At 8am i tried to ring to get an appointment at docs cos i feel im losing the plot, didnt get through till 8.30 to be told all appointmnets for today gone, cant see anyone unless i ring at 8am on tuesday.

Am going to the priory school later and am going to take DS with me.

Take it easy Bonkerz! Have you remembered to eat - all that stress needs extra food! Try and take some moments to slow down and recharge - something I always find difficult when there is so much to do and time limits to meet. Energetic floor scrubbing followed by a well deserved scented bath is my way!
Have you a list of the points you need to notice in your visit this afternoon? Best of luck. Hope the day improves. ((hugs))

no time for eating magso i have a bloody report to write!! Am struggling to find out how DSs statement is being met and its something i need to put into the report! My head is spinning.

I do have a huge list of things to ask this afternoon, luckily i have already visited the school and had a good look round so know the environment is suitable. I need to get papers sorted for admission (this will then prove to panel he can go there) i also need to goet price lists and ideas on number of pupils and extra groups DS can attend as well as finding out class numbers etc etc tec

Have had an excellent visit with the priory school. Apparently there are now 3 children from the same county trying to get admission to this school. Our city council have started using it for special pupils and its the county council that have reservations. One problem is that because it is a new school and only has 10 pupils it cannot become approved. it is registered with OFSTED, it got no recommendations and achieved a satisfactory grade. It is registered with DCES and is approved by them as being 'value for money' and it will be able to become approved in 2010 when it has its next OFSTED inspection!
the other issue is still the peer group thing but i think i have that argument in hte bag now so not too worried about that!
the school have agreed to offer DS 6 weeks FREE on the assessment but the school itself costs 22k per term (66k per annum!) im not sure how that comapres with a state speical school in another county but it actually seems fairly reasonable considering you have eliminated transport costs and that the school can meet ALL dss needs immediately!

Well done Bonkerz!!!!

You've got a pretty cast iron case I think.

60K is expensive and the Priory group are a profit making organisation but he won't have to board and there won't be transport or costs associated with therapy so that will be brill. Also, the priory group run several very successful schools so surely their point about it not being approved although valid is a little spurious because all of Priory's other schools are and surely it will be run on the same lines.

I feel the 'end is nigh' and they will, hopefully, give in soon (probablly not until the end of the summer term though - that would be far to sensible - letting you know where your child is educated in September - not that I'm cynical or anything...)

well i suppose i shouldnt be surprised BUT LEA didnt ring me back today. Instead i have had a shitty email off head of SENA saying he tried to ring which i know is not true as we have an answer machine and i did 1471 and last number to call was 8.30am and it was the priory school! My mobile has also been on and i have literally hugged it all day so they have not tried to ring me.
The email basically said that he knew we were unhappy and that he recommends if we are not happy with service that we go to mediation! THIS is the same man who refused to assess DS stating that children like DS dont need statements becasue they are reserved for children who cannot talk/walk etc. He is a complete twat!!
I have forwarded him the letter via email (he will regret emailing me now as i will bombard him!!!) and have told him i will fight for the priory school no matter what it takes!

Am now very tempted to approach the local papers.