I am spitting amd- Arrrrrghhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh

[Peachy]

just got called into school to change DS3's nappy! (it wasn't even dirty but that's by the by I guess)

It seems that even though theya re aware of DDA advice that this is discrimantory (I gave them Yurts info), the OT ahs advised they would need a second adult to be able and as they don't have the funding then its a no-no.

there's no facilities either- i ahd to change him on the floor (really great at 30 weeks pg with a abd back!) and bring home dirty nappy wipes etc, if I want I can choose to rpovide the changing equipment and disposal equipment.

WTF?

Is it my fault that DS3 is in nappies? he's autistic for goodness sake, they knew about this ages back- it was indeed why the ASD school refused him- and yet they said that yes, I am supposed to sit in and wait by the phone every day in case he needs a change.

What- give up Uni then? Pop over maybe when I am in labour (oops sorry MW, know I am 9cm dilated but just got to pop over school....)? I have a sick child at home and it was only luck that Dh ahd just got up and could care for him, else I'd have ahd to drag him over in storm conditions.

Apparently there'snobody at the LEA who can take myc all at the moment

Formal letter to Head, Chair of Governors, LEA, and MP requiring immediate response - amazing how fast they communicate if you suggest the press will be informed too.
I'm timetabled for nappy changes in my job - we always have 2 adults with each child; but big mainstream school, so possible to arrange.
Change frequency alters as child's needs change - not easy to cope with sudden poos, but second adult can be the secretary if needed. TAs do most of the changes.
All pupils who need it are changed at least twice a day.
Peachy - is there a medical room? Where would school nurse/HV see pupils?
What are governors doing to meet the DDA? 'Access for all' includes disabled parents needing toilet while on site..

Peachy I am so sorry!
I had a similar problem when Ds started school and it was appalling. And yes they did leave him soiled until I arrived even when it took nearly 2 hours once to get there! It was frankly negligent. And dont get me on not helping a less able child access food!
Apparently they needed 2 staff to change ds or it could be considered assault. I gave written permission for the TAs to change and this seemed to help! I also had a meeting with the school nurse who helped smooth the path. Ds wasnt in f/t nappies - just out but lots of accidents so could be changed standing up in the medical room! I supplied a well stocked change bag.
It was the lack of basic care towards my child and plain stupidity that was so upsetting!
Sending sypathetic thoughts your way!

I do supply a changing abg each day, he wouldn't know if he were dirty or wet (severe sensory hyposensitivity as dx'd by OT) so I am reliant on them to spot if he needs changing.

Had a chat with a Governor today who said 'well we are paying for the 1-1'- Is aid well no you're not, LEA does, it's in his statement- apaprently last head informed Governors that school was funding it all !.

Catok the DDA is only 3rd on their list atm, presumably because Ofsted could kick up over the child protection policy admission (no trained teachers) and H&Safety lacks. They're convening a committee and I put my name down, but she said it really isn't a priority.

There is a medical room but it is tiny- there's a floor level pile of cushions for sick kids to rest on, but surely a TA changing a nappy on the floor would be an issue of H&S because of risk to back? I was certainly worried I wouldn't get up again yesterday . There's also no disposal methods available which is an issue as I can gurantee that after one day of ds3's stinky nappy in his bag hung in the corridor they won't want a repeat LOL!

There's too much that ahsn't beena ddressed- no 1-1 at lunchtimes means he won't be able to access a packed lunch (opening cartons etc not a skill atm), and they say he can't have a cooked lunch option. Also the lunchtime supervisor was told about ds3's allergies and yet DH had to step in to stop them giving him a carton of milk immediately after (at a school event we were helping at). Then after Easster he will only get 1-1 50% of the time, by which point he should be using PECs at there won't be anyone available for that.

Oh and apaprently teh 1-1 contract is only temporary because the Governors are worried about cah - its not as if they could keep the money the LEA pay 9and they have a £40K surplus)

never mind though, awaitinga call from the SN advocate for teh area who is a bulldog for thsi sort of thing and will mince them alive LOL- almost got last head sacked

they are just crap aren't they. DD was meant to star at mainstream nursery last Sept but it was delayed and delayed (money saving?) so now its meant to be next Monday....
But have they got the SN chair and had the epilepsy training? Hell no.
So I have to stay with her cos she might have a fit.
If she does I'm gonna stand there and panic
Mind you, they act like a bunch of nervous pigeons about her over handling etc. She's not made of china ffs. You would think they'd never seen a child with CP before.
rant etc
So there goes another Monday morning

Why they hell don't they get the training in place? BIBIC have offered us PEC's training for the school for the cost of eptrol (they'd fund the trainer) so its not ahrd to access- who does the CP triaing? It's not as if they don't get warning about SN kids is it, DS3's beeen known to them since he was at bursery last academic year.

Do you think (we do) that they just HOPE we'll bugger offand move away, or soemthing?

Streeeeeeet! Streeeeeeet! It's calling you Peachy!

I would be fuming, absolutely fuming .
Ds1's Mainstream 1:1 changes his nappies no prob.`

OK some progress-

LEA told them to bugger off when SENCO called to complain (hee hee, as she put it 'I suppose you got there first' LOL)

So they now acknowledge they have to go ahead, and that funding issues are between them and the LEA.

BUT

They won't accept ds3 full time from Easter now as they have realised (shocker!) he needs full time 1 - 1 and until they get that they cannot have him full time. So they've called a statement review.

Now that is good if it gets the funding- but advocates have warned it could be therir way of removing him as the only way tehy can do that is by getting school name removed from statement.

So we will see......

(and yes Sphil, it is calling me LOL)

Peachy, I see you live in Caerleon - have you been in touch with your AM, or Snap Cymru? My dd goes to a specialist ASD school and they change nappies without a problem. Loads of kids are bussed into her school from all over wales - Ashgrove School in Penarth. Was this an option for you? Its done wonders for DD

The local ASD school is brynglas, but that's under threat of closure (or rather the unit the school is attached to is)- funnily enough someone at SN rugby mentioned the Penarth school. I am wondering if LEA will suddenly back down when faced with bill for total 1-1, and allow him to attend SN school- hope so.

SNApa re fab (I refered to them below as Advocates LOL- les is amazing!), we did speak to them and they were really helpful. We used our AM to get the first staement but will keep him in mind again, have met his wife a few times which helps LOL.

Are you in penarth then milge? Didn't relaise anyone here was local

Peachy, I am in Cardiff, but pushed for DD to attend Ashgrove and am pleased we did.It was a bit of a battle though - priority is given to children in the Vale. They accept out of county children as it is the Regional school for Wales. I really would push for specialist schooling, your current situation sounds horrific. We were prepared to litigate to get the placement we wanted and a letter before action( from a known educational lawyer), to your LEA, if they don;t provide the full statement/suitable provision, may just do the trick .
The only downside with Ashgrove, imho, is that the kids have a very long day - picked up by bus around 7.45, dropped home again anytime from 4-5. The school facilities, like all Vale schools, are falling to bits, but the teaching/behavior management/SALT is excellent.

Peachy the school do sound like they are failing your ds.
The practical problems like the nappy changing can be overcome very easily but if their attitude stinks & they are going to create problems at every opportunity everything will become a battle.
Hopefully this will be just whats needed to get your ds at the school you want.

OK, update:

saw Paediatrician today.

Paed agrees (finally!) that ds3 is definitely ASD, her calssification is HFA with severe language and understanding difficulties that cause him to present as a child with lower functioning ASD. he possible also has a separate sensory disorder which relates to the incontinence.

She aims to get a formal dx produced in the next 10 weeks (her aim is before baby arrives), and she is attending the statement review BUT she has decided she wants to argue for SN school, she thinks he will be much better suited to the local ASD unit, however that is under threat of closure so nobody is quite sure what's happening there.

In the apst, once she ahs taken someone on (LEA, school for ds1) we've always amde progress, so fingers crossed.......

She is having DH and I in again in the next few weeks outside constrained clinic times to talk through again.

That sounds positive Peachy. It's good to have had such a precise dx - DS2's dx just said 'ASD' and no-one has ever told us whether he's severe or mild, or whether he has learning difficulties. Think we've worked it out tho .

Told the SENCO the DX today and that paed wants to be included at the meeting (her exact words were 'he's been complex for a long time, his needs were clearly documented a year ago, why is all this happening now when it could have been sorted before' pmsl), and SENCO said 'Well with a DX like that he should be in a SN unit, not here'

Now I agree but nice to see how committed to inclusion she actually is!

I did point out the SN ASD unit is attached to a school that ahs been under the threat of closure for a while now and may not be able to take him but that was ignored. ho hum!