Primary school auties : spring 2021 and beyond - thread 6

[danni0509]

Hi. New thread.

This is the continuation of the thread for parents / carers of autistic children / children with additional needs. Most of us are parents of children in year 1 / year 2.

Links to old threads

Thread 1 - www.mumsnet.com/Talk/special_needs/3080753-DS-with-ASD-starting-school-Sept-2018-I-am-feeling-overwhelmed

Thread 2 - www.mumsnet.com/Talk/special_needs/3451020-Reception-auties-2018-19-thread-2

Thread 3 - www.mumsnet.com/Talk/special_needs/3628263-Auties-transition-to-Year-1-thread-3

Thread 4 - www.mumsnet.com/Talk/special_needs/3748449-Primary-school-Auties-into-2020-thread-4

Thread 5 - www.mumsnet.com/Talk/special_needs/3953023-Primary-school-auties-summer-and-beyond-thread-5?pg=1

Everyone welcome x

Hi.

Ds went back to school today, it was a long 3 weeks!

He starts his new school in 4 weeks. (They pushed the date back a week and said I’d got the date wrong when I know that I absolutely never! Whatever, so he starts in 4 weeks, I take him and wait for 2 weeks then he has half term and after end of may half term he goes back with the taxi transport beginning of June. My la have arranged the taxi and escort and bought him the crelling harness and we are meeting the taxi driver and escort the week before he starts in the taxi.

My sister had her baby a few days ago so I’ve been this morning after I dropped ds off, he is totally gorgeous but honestly it does not make me broody 😂 I haven’t let ds near him yet as ds told me he’s going to hit him with a dinosaur and take his dummy away etc so ds has FaceTimed and he’ll have to do that for a bit as he will likely hit him 😔 ds wrote him a card and drew him a big bottle of milk inside the card bless him so I’ll have to do it carefully as Jesus he can’t whack a newborn!

Hope everyone’s ok x

Oh dear @danni0509 - sounds stressful! Maybe he's saying it because he finds it a bit stressful to be near a newborn and knows if he says that he won't have to? Anyway, he's not wrong really, newborns are a bit stressful, but hopefully he'll adjust and lose his compulsion to wage any dinosaur attacks/dummy raids!

A bit annoying about the start date, but good that the taxi etc. is all sorted for after half term. We're doing OK here. Was first day back today and both kids seemed happy to go. Our nanny is leaving after half term so that will be a big change for us! I'm hoping we'll still see her in her new job and that she'll come and visit as the children will really miss her. And of course it will be a practical challenge but it's been such a luxury really and in some ways I'm looking forward to just being the 4 of us, as long as I can get my work to calm down and behave.

Sounds stressful @danni0509 but sweet to have the new baby etc. I know what you mean about impulsiveness around small ones though as I wouldn't trust my DS near a non walker let alone a newborn. He would never mean any harm but you know, best to not be in that situation.
@LightTripper that's some big changes coming up, hugs. I'm going through qn hours reduction process at work to better fit with DS and life and it is hard but also liberating!

Yes, definitely liberating too! Honestly my only problem is my own stupid self. I know I will take on too much, get in a stress, and then correct - I am really going to try to just cut to the chase and learn to say "no". And you never know, maybe it will happen :)

Light a big change for your family, it’s great that you are feeling so positive about it. Don’t take on more! I thought you had cut your hours down?

danni sounds like you are doing the right thing keeping ds at a distance from the baby for now. Also, much more enjoyable for you to be able to relax and spend time with the baby alone.

Ds was off school poorly yesterday. He had a high temperature so I had him covid tested which has already come back negative. I’m not sure if he can return today. He’s woken up fine (though of course early) but I think there may be some 48 hour post temperature rule which is a pain as it would mean he couldn’t go back until Monday. Will ask.

I would have thought tomorrow would be OK at least @openupmyeagereyes as it was such a short lived temperature?

We've got some of those rapid tests in. If you get proper Covid symptoms (temperature etc.) you still need to do a PCR, but I thought they'd be useful for the odd day I go into the office, and also for if any of us get a cold or headache or other symptoms that wouldn't justify a proper PCR test, just for a bit of peace of mind.

Although I've got my jab now! But only a couple of days ago so a couple of weeks yet until I'm somewhat protected/less likely to transmit.

And yes, I have cut my hours and it's good. But when we don't have a nanny I'm going to need to cut more - so I need to say "no" to anything new that is going to last more than a few weeks!

He’s going back tomorrow Light, I took him to one of our country parks today. It’s so lovely at the moment but we could really use some rain.

We have some LF tests too, I’m doing them twice a week.

Practice saying no Light

Glad to hear that your DS has bounced back Open.

Had DS's EHCP review today. Went pretty well, I felt that they listened to me and welcomed some of my suggestions. One issue is the transition to year three. DS's school has separate buildings and playgrounds for infant and juniors so as well as moving up a key stage it is a different environment. DS has had the same TA as his 1:1 since he started school. I have pushed since before he started school for the 1:1 role to be shared but it's never happened and he is v dependent on her. I asked today if she was staying with him or if someone else was taking over but they have not decided yet. I'm not sure what to wish for.

dimples that's a tough one isn't it. I hope they can come up with some ideas to make his transition easier, so much change will be tricky.

I'm nervous about the transition because none of the remaining classrooms in the school have a side room for him to use. I hope they can come up with some solutions that will suit him but they are limited due to it being such a small school.

Ds has gone back to school today, I thought it was going to be painful but there was only a small amount of procrastinating thankfully

Hi all, I've NC from being Mrs to a famous ballroom dancer!
@dimples76 and @openupmyeagereyes DS is already starting to ask about year 1 and whether his 121 ladies can come with him, which door he'll use, etc etc. It's so hard isn't it. I'm going to email senco next week I think. I'm torn because he loves his 121, but also don't want him getting too reliant on her because then what if she leaves or something? You never know, we might get the special school provision by then anyway

Hi all hope everyone is ok after the Easter break.

Been a bit preoccupied here as we just got a two month old puppy! Wondering what on earth we are doing right now but hopefully it will get easier soon

Ooh a puppy @livpotter how sweet and a lot of work though! What type of dog?

He's a Labrador. We already have an older lab but he's a bit of an old man now and we wanted a puppy to hopefully perk him up a bit.

That's good news Open re the return to school.

Wow a puppy Liv. Unfortunately although I would love a pet DS is not to be trusted around animals.

DD is poorly, slight raised temp. Really hoping that it doesn't go higher and we have to test and isolate again.

@dimples76 I think there's something going round as DS had similar thing that turned into cold and cough, and my throat is funny, but lateral tests say negative. DS is very nice to our very elderly cat but then again said cat is besotted with DS and deffo grumpier with the rest of us!

Hope your ds feels ok today dimples

Thank you. It felt like a v long day with a whingy toddler but she seemed a lot better by the end of the day. Hopefully, she sleeps well tonight. Unfortunately I won't as DS has taken up residence in my bed.

Hi. Sorry been awol for a bit, still logging in occasionally just don’t always have the energy to post! Ds has been really wearing my patience out.

He starts his new school 2 weeks time, he leaves his current school next Friday.

He thinks his current staff move to his new school with him, I didn’t realise he thought this until he made a comment about miss xxxx at the new school, I was like no ds she isn’t going with you, she’s staying at x and you’ll have new adults at x and he looked utterly confused.

I’m sure he’ll be fine!

His behaviour has been a bit all over the place, he honestly finds things over and over again to start an argument about. He looks for arguments constantly, very wearing!

His new school have not been in touch, they haven’t sent me a pack out as they said they would or arranged any video calls with ds like they said, they haven’t told me where the school is / what uniform ds needs, literally heard nothing. (I’ve looked online about the uniform and ordered it, and have drove there to see where it is already so I know where I’m driving in 2 weeks time, but they don’t know any of that!) they seem pretty shit actually!

How is everyone doing?

That’s not a great start is it danni, perfectly reasonable to phone them and ask for it, especially the transition stuff for ds.

I hope everyone is ok. I have been reading but not getting around to posting.

Ds is doing well. He is still dry overnight which is great. We had that soaking wet night, followed by a smaller incident which is more what I expected but since then nothing. I’m sure we’ll still get some but I’m super happy about how it’s gone.

Sleep is still up and down despite the melatonin. We get a v early start followed by a (slightly) better couple. He was awake for 3 hours last week, went back to sleep then still up at 5:40. Typically he’s awake around 4:30. It could be worse!

He has gone back to a breakfast cereal he ate daily for years but had refused for maybe the last couple of years. It’s one of the few non wheat based things he ate so I’m pleased with that as well as it being another option.

Class photos today. He hasn’t had a haircut yet so he’s a bit scruffy but thankfully it’s not as noticeable in the group where they’re so small.

Have a great week everyone.

Oh and dh and I both had our first vaccines last week. No ill effects so far.

That's disappointing Danni.

Open sorry about the sleep. Good progress on toileting and the cereal though.

DS is doing quite well. Last week I had a chat with DS's teacher which gave me pause for thought. A private OT assessed DS at school. No report yet but advised that he is motor skills are at 4 year old level (he turns 8 next month). I also asked his teacher how long thought he could continue in mainstream. She said she thought that he should manage until year 5. DD is due to start school when DS starts yr5 - think that this made me feel rather emotional that they might never be at school together. At least I felt that we were on the same page re DS.

dimples hopefully the report will be useful. Did the teacher say why she thought yr5? How is dd doing?

I think that it was mostly based on past experiences. She said that DS is quite good at learning new concepts in the moment but he doesn't retain the knowledge/understanding in the same way that other children can and needs a lot of overlearning. She said that she thought it is not at this stage yet but in the future he might need so much differentiation that he would need to be out of the class a lot and not feel included. He is working towards year 2 level in reading but working towards year 1 for everything else. The gap seems to be widening to me. Also socially at the moment DS tolerates (sometimes likes) his peers babying him but she thinks that this will be a source of conflict going forwards. No sign of report but Thursday is SENCO's day out of the classroom so perhaps there'll be news tomorrow.

DD is doing well. She is v chatty, loves going on walks and finds her big brother v funny.

Dimples with your ds being 8 next month is he in year 3 or did you keep him back a year or was that Liv? I can’t quite remember x