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SN children

Here are some suggested organisations that offer expert advice on special needs.

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Original poster

According to another mum I am very lucky........

38 replies

dustystar · 02/10/2007 13:14

....because my son has a statement and so i can send him to the best school in the area if i want and know he'll get a place

I pointed out to her that he had a statement because he has SN which can make things very difficult for us and for him and that I would prefer ds not to have SN and then not have a hope of getting into the good school She just gave me a skeptical look and walked away. I don't think she was trying to be nasty but sometimes people are just so insensitive that I am left almost speechless

OP posts:

magsi · 02/10/2007 13:22

I'm afraid I wouldn't have even graced her with a reply. As far as I am concerned, if someone is as insensitive to come out with a comment like that, I am not going to waste time explaining to them.

Some people are amazing arn't they!

needmorecoffee · 02/10/2007 13:41

Its like the people who tell you you are 'lucky' to geta disabled parking badge. They just don't get you'd rather would a hundred miles than see your child suffer with his or her disability.
I did get told I was 'lucky' not having to go throiugh potty training with dd cos of her severe CP. I wish that person would be about when dd is 25 and I'm changing her nappy.

Original poster

dustystar · 02/10/2007 13:51

needmorecofee

OP posts:

Nat1H · 02/10/2007 15:48

I think you did very well not to thump her {grin}

Nat1H · 02/10/2007 15:48

I meant !!!

Blandmum · 02/10/2007 16:07

Some people just live on a different planet

Original poster

dustystar · 02/10/2007 16:09

TBH we have it easy compared to some of you on the SN board but that doesn't mean that every day isn't a struggle - especially at the moment. Still he had a good day at school today and so far has behaved at home so hurray

OP posts:

chisigirl · 02/10/2007 16:22

hi dustystar, well done for keeping your cool.
i so know that feeling of being grateful for each "good" day at school...

mm22bys · 02/10/2007 16:29

Some people are fortunate though to remain clueless about all this. I took so much for granted with my DS1. I am not saying I would be as insensitive as some of the NTers on this thread, but in some respects I have been there....

lourobert · 02/10/2007 19:11

My neighbours have just left and we were discussing the parking problem in our road for one of them to turn round and say 'but parking wont be a problem for you in a year when you get your disabled bay...you lucky thing!' those were her exact words. Her husband wanted to curl up and die, i could see it in his face....she then went on to say that she might try and get one as she comes under the DDA!!!!!! the mind boggles.

She left embarraseed when I actually responded to this!

Sidge · 02/10/2007 22:15

Silly witch.

You should have asked her if she's always stupid and insensitive or just on Tuesdays...

Jenkeywoo · 02/10/2007 22:19

what an silly old cow - god I am just sick of people being jealous of the 'benefits' of having a disabled child. I've been told I'm lucky that dd can't crawl and get into mischief (so it's easier to have an 18 month old who can't crawl screaming in frustration all day?). I haven't even dared mention that we get dla to anyone apart from my mum as I know people out there will be jealous.

salsmum · 03/10/2007 10:26

Maybe we should ring up these no brain idiots who consider us all sooo lucky when our disabled charges are awake at 3am in pain/need turning or when they're in hospital having their umteenth operation, when they have lost their little school friends to their disabilities and you have to tell them why they're not on the school bus anymore .
But of course having a lovely new motorbility vehicle in the drive and blue badges makes up for all that??????? NOT IN A MILLION BLOODY YEARS.

caroline3 · 03/10/2007 10:55

These people are simply not worth giving the time of day to. They really do seem to inhabit a totally different universe. Just blank it out and ignore it.

onlyjoking9329 · 03/10/2007 11:40

we must be really really lucky then

Mitchell81 · 04/10/2007 09:30

Some people don't think about what they say, They don't even comtemplate that what they are saying will be taken in offence. I probably would have said all the wrong things before I had a disabled child.

Dinosaur · 04/10/2007 21:34

A woman at work said that she thought that lots of parents got their children diagnosed as having Asperger's so they would get extra help in school. This is after I had told her about DS's dx. I didn't know what to say...

tibni · 04/10/2007 21:40

Some people just do not have a clue!

dizzy34 · 07/10/2007 09:32

I once got told that we were lucky cos our ds gets DLA higher rate and mobility. I supppose she didnt even consider that the down side to this is that we will only have him for a very short time, he will never walk or talk or eat and has lots of seizures daily.

Her son is fine but she has little money. I suppose its what you call lucky eh? Give me no money anyday

needmorecoffee · 07/10/2007 21:22

We were in the queue in Morrisons today and some woman started talking to us about dd in her wheelchair and she asked if we hada blue badge. Which we do. You're so lucky she then said (DH has never heard this line bfeore and I could see his jaw drop) DS, who has Aspergers turned and said 'what, are you crazy, whats lucky about having a disabled baby?'
Sometimes having a son with Aspergers can be a good thing
The woman did a sickly smile and shuffled off to another queue while DS loudly continued with 'is she stupid or what'

chipmonkey · 07/10/2007 21:44

Well done to your ds, nmc! Tell it like it is!

needmorecoffee · 08/10/2007 10:10

We don't have a car though.....but 2 blue badges

PeachyFleshCrawlingWithBugs · 08/10/2007 10:24

Like that works! laods fo schools actually ahve the power to refuse statemented kids, many Church schools for one- look at the battle we had! Governor selection is the norm around here.

I'd have invited her to come babysit then.... she could have ahd yesterday, where DS1 was in overload all day (because we broke routine Saturday) and ds3 screeched all day 9we don't know why and he can't tell us).

PeachyFleshCrawlingWithBugs · 08/10/2007 10:27

Could the blue badge comment been from someone who has been trying to get one I wonder? I know several kids with ASD who get middle rate care and get mobility and a badge and I do think they're lucky- but only in a they must have been better at filling in the form than me, wish i knew how they do it sort of way- as we get 2 X higher rate and no mobility. Do you see what I mean? nothing to do with the disability- just awareness that its probably my cockup that meant we slipped down some bizarre anomally gap where its acknowledged neither child ahs anys ense of danger (ds3 on reins) and need 1-1 constant supervision, but not help outside...... am i makings ense? probaly not

FioFio · 08/10/2007 12:39

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn

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