Had written SALT report through, time to take my head out of the sand.

[mummytosteven]

A very depressing read it was too. Hopefully a little more negative than >S's true abilities - e.g. "S is beginning to search for objects out of >sight, showing that he has the beginnings of object permanence". Conclusion >was "Although his communication is continually developing, S has very >delayed understanding and use of language for his age. There are potential >oncerns about his social interaction at this stage, but this should be >properly investigated by a multi discplinary team in due course, preferably >before he reaches school age".

so from being very positive at the >assessment, feeling he didn't need any further professional involvement, >and she didn't think he was on the spectrum, her views seem to have altered >somewhat. Oh nuts.Time to take my head out of the sand and ask HV or GP for >a paed referral now.>

same here mts, feel so protective of my ds, he loves saying hello to people, but then he seems to start talking"jargon" as salt calls it, then they look at me for translation, it is very difficult, and I do feel sad for him...

not really related to this but we were outside at a soft play place the other day and two boys of about 4, started to play a game which involved pushing my ds over, running up behind him and shoving him, was so awful to see, the mum that was looking after them(supposedly) was out of sight inside the building.

ds has trouble enough interacting, he is quite shy, though he does try, just because he can't speak the same language as the rest of the world, but this kind of thing could make him less likely to want to try

it is lonely, tearjerkingly so at times

nods in agreement. also the uncertainty is a killer - maybe the people who try and make us feel that maybe our kids are just late developers are right, but maybe it just won't have a happy ending.

Sorry I missed your update, MtS.

I can see why the SALT suggested toddler groups to encourage the social side of things but I would also say that you have to consider your own feelings too. If ds seems to be getting something from them then that's great, but if he seems indifferent to it all then don't make yourself carry on with it. Ds2 liked the toddler group I used to take him to because he could charge around the room. Tbh I don't think he picked up any social or communication skills while he was there. He can be fairly sociable but just wasn't interested in the other children enough to want to interact with them or try to copy them.

Saw the GP last week, showed her the SALT report and explained the background. She was very helpful, agreed to a paed referral within about ten minutes of me setting foot in the room, and took a copy of the SALT report to send off with the referral.

mummytosteven, atypical development can have a happy ending as well. You've met me, you've said yourself how you couldn't tell I was different. And I've explained how my being Aspergers affects me. I have (and still do with a lot of things) experienced a whole host of common autistic/aspergers traits. Not always understanding words that I normally knew, selective mutism, talking too fast, odd pausing, poor reciprocity, poor initiating, hand flapping, finger chewing, pacing, rocking, self injury, zoning out, focusing on small details, not able to say I needed the toilet, not able to express wants and feelings, poor motor planning, having words in mind but not able to articulate them. I could go on. But no one told me my life would be ruined because of these things. No one told me I couldn't do anything because of my difficulties. Now, I'll be honest I did need support, I should have had a lot more help and to be honest the only reason I don't ask for help now is through sheer bloody pride. That's why I'm getting help for Ds1 (and also because he is more severely affected and needs the help), so he doesn't go through what I went through. But I'm proof that someone who - as a child - presented with enough signs to be picked up on in the 1970's to early 1990's (whatever label they would have assigned to me) can manage and get on with things and achieve things. Your Steven will be the same. He may be on the spectrum, he may not, but he will still achieve a lot of things.

waves to bullet . I am sort of coming to a similar conclusion myself - that I am more concerned that DS communication develops further than whether or not he turns out to be on the spectrum. I think my concerns about him being on the spectrum are primarily school related - I had such unhappy school experiences that I am a bit para about this.

Bullet ~ thanks for your post. I think that you have explained how I feel about my own dd who has AS (she is 7.5)
As far as I am concerned I am not going to allow her dx to get in the way. Her life is not mapped out for her and I am hoping she will still lead a relatively normal life.
Tell you something I am on a parenting course at the moment and the problems that a lot of them are having with their "nt" teenagers is scary.

MTS, we were in a similar position to you- HV's don't refer until after 3 either (at all- he had no words at 3 after regression) and now he ahs been referred the SALT has left and not been replaced. So its not just you, . We have been told that DS3 has ASD by the PAed, but she can't formally dx without SALT.

Agree with the postt hat said you have to fight fro what you want, having 32 kids on the spectrum has turned me from quiet wallflower not rpepared to say boo to a duckling, much less a Goose into a hard hitting bitch where my kids are concerned. I hate it, I have had no choice. Complaining gets you everywhere, mroes the pity

Hi Peachy, I guess it must be difficult having a recent diagnosis to take on board. The system at its worst - as would appear to be in your area even more than mine - is Kafkaesque. I just cannot believe that a SALT (who cannot diagnose) is needed to back up a paed's diagnosis.

Its because his languiage is so severely delayed that some of his beahviours could be attributed to that- although since he saw Paed his language has come on somewhat (still 18 months or more behind) and his behaviours are more classically ASD than they were (such as hating crowds / refusing to walk in the shopping mall unless he can follow the decorative tracks on the floor.... arrghh).

Its also so that if he doesn't go to MS (in which he'll need 1 - 1 all the time) in September, they will know whether to send him to language or ASD unit. Or more relaistically when MS fails in about oooh three or four weeks after September, they'll know where to shunt him

oh gosh peachy, so you have a lot on your plate in terms of having to think through school this Sept (at least S won't be starting till next Sept). Sounds like his speech has improved a lot since his regression, so I do hope that continues to improve apace.

school is a worry for me as well - if we don't manage to move, then the nearest school(ten mins walk) is one of 4 in the city with a language base, so would assume that would be the most sensible one to get S into. sometimes you just have more to worry about than league tables etc...

League tables dont exist in my world! My kids attend the best one for miles but ds1 (AS) doesn't really get the benefit.

Checka ccess to the language base: my freiends little boy (well he's 10 doubt he'd appreciate being called that LOL) has ASD and attends a schoole iwth an ASD unit attached, but because he dosn't have a statement (Mum doesn't see point) he can't access it.

so a child would have to be formally statemented to get into a language base then, it wouldn't just be done if SALT recommended it? the whole school issue is very stressful as our flat is on the market but doesn't seem to be selling, so I just don't know where DS will be going to school, and if we do move, will want to move near a suitable school (i.e. good with language difficulties/asd). I want to plan ahead now for worst case scenario.

Hi MTS.
Glad that the GP was supportive.
I mentioned your tale of no referrals before age of 3 to some salt colleagues today.
They were as gobsmacked as me.

feeling now as it's not quite no referrals before 3, just that they are incredibly stringent about referrals.

Oh not to worry.
I'm sure there were some bloody stupid Orwellian rules to piss someone off.That's how the NHS works doncha know??

MD HV told us the same thing here, when DS3 (who as you know has real problems now) was almost 3- too young for them to be concerned.

Not necessarily MTS- it varies on the LEA, it might simply be on SALT referral.

Your LEA will have a parent partnership worker employed by them who can tell you all that over the telephone.

I remember house selling- incredibly stressful. Don't envy you one bit!

If it is ASD there's the option of applying for a statement, (well with language problems too)- IPSEA would advise when you come to that hurdle if you need to, they ahve a comprehensive website- if you're lucky and get one, then you can specify schools out of catchment. DS1 got hsi through alst week, DS3's is in the pipeline but they said he might not get one as we have no SALT report..... (Actually we're better off than most as BIBIC (again a great website to look at, would suggest a visit definitely) are paying his fees, and our CM is happy to take him if we're too concerned to send him to school (ie the 1 - 1 doesn't come through or similar) when I am in Uni. So we CAN sort it- worst case scenario I can defer, though I don't want to its an option I have, most people dont have that, you cant defer a job)

Peachy,goes to show that HVs as a rule no eff all about language.
That advice is positively dangerous.

I wasnt at the visit so cant quote (it ws DH) but he says she said SALT wouldn't be interested.

Personally, I now bypass HV's whenever I possibly can.

Barking
Bloody barking

I agree SOcci, LEA asked us to wait until June to apply (or perferably until after non-existent SALT- anyone see a pttern? ). We've asked repeatedly what will happen if he doesn't get a statement, LEA say they wills till fund 1 - 1 (yeah right- and SENCO Seemed as convinced as we did). If DS3 doesn't get a statement he doesn't start school. That simple. We still think he will end up in SN Education, cbut nobody at LEA will discuss possibility before......

yep you guessed it

LOL MD. (I have a very black SOH now!!)

Oh didnt put Socci- we applied in february!

so if I was looking at statements, would I start applying early 2008 then? think the other thing I now have to take head out of sand on is to get the nursery to get the early years advisor in to assess S (they said they were going to do this back in feb, but due to change in management it seems to have been forgotten about).

Even when you have a statement,what is promised and what you will actually get are quite often two different things.

Statemnets full of meaningless jargon and turns of phrase.

I know,having seen and contributed to literally hundreds.

(Although to be fair,do work with lots of kids who get sterling multi-disciplinary help too.)