Senco meeting - Bollocks! :(

[SilkThreads]

Aaagh.
So, new school.
before we started we spoke to outgoing Head who said ds would be put on schools sn register, a profile would be drawn up within 4 weeks of starting and he would be referred for ASD assess immediately.
(prev private assess that further ASD assess required but old NHS / LA would not accept)
I asked (nicely) if new Head would also agree and outgoing one said: 'don't worry, I am acting Head atm but actually Director of Education for this Church School area and I will ensure it is done. We later spoke to new Head and she also agreed.

To be fair, we have only been there half a term which I appreciate is nothing.
But, met with Senco today (termly meeting) and she said: 'oh, ds doing fine' He is not in any support groups (academically or socially). No profile has been done. The letter she was to write to GP re sleep issues - she's 'not had time, and why do we want it anyway' (having prev agreed). No support for learning yet as 'been very busy'.
(he's done the tests but she's not marked them yet).
WE don't yet have a reading age or Maths results.
We do know his spelling age is 3.10 years behind.
At the end we asked how the referral was going and she said: he's not been referred - I don't think he needs to be'.
We explained about prev Head and current Head say so and she said: 'well, in MY opinion, and I DO have a Masters you know, he doesn't need it - why are you so anxious about it - I have it all under control. when he goes up to High School (this is a middle school) I will write ASD on his file, but I am not a Doctor you know'.
We explained that A she might not always be there and B if we changed school it would need to be more formal and she got really shirty.
She had to leave to collect a child (fair enough) but refused to make a date for a 'further meeting' where she said she could offer 'strategies' to 'support at home' despite having a copy of a Report which recommends Melatonin and ADOS.

Aaargh. Are we stuck with this person as a barrier, or is there a way around it?

Sorry for vent

I suppose not but I really thought the School were going to be more helpful.

I wonder if it is worth going back to the Dir Ed / Head as they were both very clear that the referral would be made on the 1st day at School due to contents of previous file (which I don't think Senco has even read).

H was there and said that he was dyslexic and she said: 'well its too late for your brain ha ha - 'they' just don't make the mental connections' which I thought was really poor. She also seem surprised that ds is 'clever'. Sigh.

Because without the support of the School (the senco says he seems 'fine' to her) then I don't think we will get anywhere with the NHS.

So the Senco is going to write 'has ASD' on his report? He's not been diagnosed?
I got a diagnosis for my child with no support from school. They said he was fine.
You need to look up the triads of ASD.
They you could write a example under each triad and take that to your GP and ask to be reffered to a developmental pead

Oops! Exactly as Polter said above

Yes, do just go to your GP and ask to be referred to whatever the diagnostic pathway is for ASD in your area. School really weren't involved at all in my DD's assessment for ASD. They filled out a questionnaire and I think that was it.
You'll need a referral for melatonin too, I think. Certainly in our NHS trust only the paeds can prescribe it, not the GP. So the sooner you ask for those referrals the better.

Ok thanks.

I think that in my previous area (Scotland) the two were far more enmeshed so if school was not 'on side' you'd had it frankly.

Perhaps I'll make an appointment with the GP then.

Still v disappointed in Senco though - talking that way about learning difficulties :(

my sons first Senco said he never get a diagnosis or statement. Boy was she wrong.
Try to keep your Senco on side. Think of her as your frienenmey - Keep her close yet treat with utmost caution at least until you have her measure ( sounds like she's already shown you)

Not sure why I need to keep her on side - she isn't offering any learning support and she is not going to help re ASD assess?

sorry, not helpful remark I know. still fizzing :(

I appreciate I don't want to make an enemy of her but she has already been weird. I was extremely polite and she just rolled her eyes at us.

I don't have any issue getting on with my senco. I don't agree with her most of the time.

You might have years at the school. Years of leasing with her, years of meetings.

Just that really. I had a major row with someone and however satisfying it was at the time it was a mistake I regret as I have to see that person at school possibly for another nine years. Deep, deep joy

Yes, you are completely right.

I have at least two years of ds at this school and another nearly 4 for dd. Both have major dyslexia and poss dyscalculia too.

I need to 'get on' with her, but I find it hard as she simply repeats like a mantra: 'I have a Masters in this you know' and isn't offering either child any support for learning yet. :(
What I was told would be the case by Head, (therefore I moved Schools) and what has turned out to be the case are poles apart.

I can go over Senco's head but that will earn me her enmity, or I can put up with her dizzy lack of provision and bad attitude. Neither feels like a good option.

I see that an ASD assess is something I'd need to pursue with GP but I still think that if School is not onside that wont help.

Sorry, I just needed to vent.

I agree, zzzzz

So I need to speak to GP about referral.
That is clear from the posts above.
It wasn't the case where I was before so it is helpful for me to have that clarified so now I know what to do.
(I have wasted 3 months due to the Head telling me the referral was in process, and the senco yesterday telling me it wasn't, but not much I can do about that)

What do I do about the lack of support for learning at school though?
that is an academic issue - do I go over Senco's head or not?

Ok.
Well both are some years behind in spelling (approx. 4 for ds and 3 for dd)
Reading ages not done yet.
Maths - dd is scoring 7% on some class tests, 18% on others.
Ds - no Maths results yet.

Senco is saying 'oh, we'll get ds to help set some targets next year and he can make sounds with the groups at registration'.

I am feeling frustrated.

I can understand how annoying it is that the former head promised things when you looked around the school but they just haven't materialised.
But if you can put that frustration aside and start afresh with the staff who are working with your DC, you might find you get more of the help that they need.
I would try to focus on school matters with school. If that's support for learning for the areas where your DS is behind, ask for a meeting to discuss this specifically, ask what help or interventions are available to eg work on improving his spelling and when your DS is going to be able to access them.

Yes, it's early days, I know. I am trying not to pick up my cudgels, honestly!
(I know it wont do any good)

I chose the School because the Head seemed great.
After I had showed her the old paperwork she was immediately concerned re kids lack of progress and lack of referral for ds.
Ds was to have a 'plan' within a fortnight (as the dyslexia assess was already complete) and all teachers would know re anxiety etc.
This was to translate with new Head and she assured me it was all in hand.
The kids have found the disruption of the move really really hard.
I thought I was putting them through it for a good reason.

We've been there half a term and it turns out none of what the Head said has happened. No plan, no referral, no support in school.
he is not getting to use a keyboard for extended writing (which he was even getting in his old setting) or any support for learning (again, he was getting, though it was poor)
He's been given a black mark for having the 'wrong coloured PE socks) - dark navy instead of black (and supplied by school anyway...) and generally they are making no adjustments for his anxiety.
He is miserable and struggling. I am having a tough time getting him in at all. He isn't eating at school as he wont go to his locker to get his food money (sensory issues) etc and I have told School and nothing is happening.
And the Senco is just pratting around saying 'I have a Masters, you know'.

(I will stop ranting now, I promise)

Sure, 'not big deals' I agree.
Yet -re socks - yet, if he wont go in for the next 3 days re anxiety over it then it IS a big deal to him.

re lunch money. that is the system at the school. lockers are kept locked apart from 5 mins before lunch to retrieve money. it's crowded, he is scared of the kid with the locker next to him, so he wont go in.

I agree about problem solving sessions at home with ds but he is not usually v interested. After school all he wants to do is sit on his pc to relax. he is exhausted after the school day and so weekends might be a better time to pick.

melawati yes, you are right. Me being frustrated (thinking I am hiding it but prob not very well) will not bring out the best in the school

meeting re focus on spelling interventions etc - that was what we thought yesterday was to be about (plus we wanted to ask about referral).

Senco just stonewalled re 'I'm the expert' which was really disappointing.
All we know is that he is not to be put in a group yet as she's not decided which one (he's done the test, she just hasn't marked it). When he is (next term?) then he will 'be making sounds, and repeating words'. I'd hoped to have something more specific so I could also use it at home (both kids need a lot of input re spelling - it will never be great with their dyslexia but I am sure we can improve it).