DLA - Good news so why does it feel so depressing?

[coppertop]

I sent ds1's DLA form off just before Christmas and got the letter about their decision today. He used to get medium rate care but from April he will get higher rate care and lower rate mobility. This will continue until his 11th birthday.

It's good news that he is entitled to extra money, especially when so many other people are having to go through the appeals process, but it just makes me feel that the differences between ds1 and other children of his age are now increasing. He's fairly high-functioning but it's only when I started filling in those wretched forms that I realised just how much extra help he does need. Everything from changing his clothes so often because of all the toileting accidents to giving him a running commentary while walking down the street so that he doesn't walk into people or lamp-posts etc. I hate these reminders that our lives will always be different to everyone else's.

I sent DS4's off last week and we are waiting. I know what you mean coppertop - it's one of those hollow victory situations.

I found filling in the form so depressing, and the lady from the CDC warned mme it would be as you almost have to be so negative about your child.

Hugs Coppertop. It really is a hollow victory. I have ds2's appeal tribunal on Monday and am really not sure how to feel. I will be livid if turned down again but sad if he gets awarded. It really isn't a happy situation.

Well done on the award though, I am sure the extra money will be useful.

I've just had a letter in the post about DS4's claim. It says they can't give a decision yet as they are waiting for a report from his consultant. Is that normal?

Afraid so. I had a similar letter saying the were contacting our GP (excpet our gp wasn't there, another from the practice filled it in and really ballsed up our claim.....not that I am bitter or anything ) It is standard practice as far as I know.

My first thoughts were "oh no they don't believe me." but I guess they just need the expert opinion too.

I think it is such an emotional part of having a child with SN- you are really not alone!!

I remember when we got DDs first claim through, I just sat and cried my eyes out. Not only was it the sheer relief financially but also the realisation that actually, we do have a disabled child.

All thoase negative thoughts that you have to put yourself through to complete these forms just come rushing back in your brain, and yes, although you have suceeding in getting the claim, you still have all those negatives to cope with day in day out!!!

Sending hugs CT!!!!{{{{{{{{{hugs}}}}}}}}}}

Our renewal forms have come through recently and I am really putting off doing them too. Likewise I have found writing the evidence to get statutory assessment statement depressing because you have to concentrate on and emphasise all the difficulties.

ive just filled DS,s in.
When i last filled his in, he was in school and his ASD didnt seem that evident, well 18 months later and he,s not in school and his ASD is soooo evident now, its very depressing especially when i compared notes from 2 years ago.

It gets me really depressed, just waiting to hear what we have been awarded.

Sending you cyber hugs CT.

jen
xx

Thanks, everyone.

I think today has just been one of those days where everything got to me. I hate DLA forms.

I saw on another thread today that apparently DLA is just soooo easy to get.

That's the one. Grrr!

I've just read that one. I know have an image of ds1 driving a forklift truck- and lots of damage That was a bizarre one!

Ahhh a Psychiatrist. Right.

DLA easy to get - in the immortal words of the icon Jim Royle - 'my arse!!!'

Good news on the award but i totally empathise. I am grateful for ours but would love not to be entitled to it.

LOL! Perhaps he could stuff leaflets into envelopes as suggested on the other thread?

what,where, a thread about how getting DLA is easy, please someone tell me cos id like to know how it is.

Only if he could do it on front of the TV Coppertop lol.

DS1 stuff envelopes????? OMG whoever suggested that could sit next to him and try and teach him. PMSL. He'd require a (paid) full time carer to keep him on track. Hmm that would be financially viable.

Jenk - It's the one about single parents and benefits.

LOL! I'm not sure the 'underclass' deserve a TV, do they?

I hope you're not expecting a carer for ds1? How will that teach him to contribute to society? Tut tut!

to you coppertop

It's a weird feeling isn't it? Relief at getting the extra money but then a real low feeling that things aren't right with your child and you just so want them to be "normal".

ds3 has recently been awarded middle rate and when he turns 5 I am told he will get lower rate mobility too.

Is it just me or do things seem to get worse as they get a bit older, you know things becoming more apparent? Or is it just me finding it hard to accept?

I think in some ways it does get worse. I think the gap between ds1 and NT children of his age seems to be wider than it was when he was younger. Changing nappies at night when they're pre-schoolers is a real PITA but when you're still doing it when they're 6 or 7 it just seems so much worse.