Eurgh! I am having one of those days with ds1. He's finally stopped melting down after being caught watching YouTube videos, despite a screen ban. Mum has offered to have him for the rest of the day, but I know he'll construe that as me not loving him and it will just make things worse.
Just tried to sit down and have 'the talk' with him about lying and taking advantage etc, but he's adamant he thought he could do it - funny how he's only literal when it suits him. Basically, I was daft enough to allow him to watch one video on my laptop, as we'd had an email about a gaming project he's involved with and he somehow interpreted my "I am going to be kind and let you watch the video in the email" as 'you can then link to whatever you like on YouTube and watch several other videos as well'. 
He damn well knows he shouldn't have done it, but he's arguing black's white he thought I meant he could watch every video on the gaming company's channel. He knows, I know he's lying, but there's no way he's backing down, so I've sent him back up to his room.
This morning he told me he couldn't go and get dressed, as he is scared to be upstairs on his own (he was for years, but actively chooses to be up there quite often these days - when it suits him). He flatly refused to go unless ds2 was up there too, but I know he's been baiting and harassing ds2, so I wanted them to get dressed separately and made him - cue many tears and much shouting. Fast forward an hour and he's decided dd's rendition of the Frozen song (oh yes, we have that to deal with too ) is too annoying, so where is he? He's on his bed - upstairs - reading a book, of his own volition.
Also had an enormous to do about tooth brushing when we got back from dropping the others at school this morning. Much ranting, screaming and sobbing (all because I wanted him to use the toothbrush timer, as he's literally only scaring his teeth with the brush these days and his teeth looked dire when he spoke to me in the playground) . This was followed by a talk about why I am teaching him appropriate hygiene and self-care skills and what would happen if I didn't.
Oh - and apparently he can't wear his Levellers t-shirt, the one I bought for him because he was jealous of ds2's - because although he likes alternative music, it's embarrassing and humiliating to be seen in public in it. Apparently wearing a t-shirt you've wiped snot on and dropped half your dinner down is fine - but an 80s/90s band t-shirt NO WAY!
I have no more energy for 'talks' and frankly feel like they're a waste of time anyway as he nods and agrees, promises not to do whatever it was again or to try harder - then does it again within 5 minutes of leaving me.
I have spend the past two weeks organising the holiday that we're going on - to the same place as we've been every year bar one since ds was born, because he won't go anywhere else - and as usual buying magazines, books and dvds to keep them busy while we're there (because ds1 now expects this based on previous years) and generally going all out to make sure they all have a great time, even though poor ds2 is really getting sick of the place - yet apparently I am a horrible, mean Mummy who doesn't love him.
Rant over - I will now return to the mountain of dirty washing I have, partially thanks to ds1 changing his t-shirt at least three times a day this week.