It sounds trivial, but can I just rant quietly?

[lougle]

DD2 has got in the habit of spelling words, but only using the first 2 or 3 letters, so I have to, somehow, magically, work out the word, the context, the random conversation from 2 or 3 hours earlier that it relates to, etc.

A case in point: DD3 was playing tug with our puppy/dog, Patch. He's (just) 2. She was playing tug with the rope.

DD2 decided that to give DD3 a chance to grab the rope, she should kick the dog, repeatedly. Unsurprisingly, he bit her. Entirely accidentally, I suspect, because she had no injury, bar a tiny flake of loose skin on her little finger (no redness, scratches, blood or any other sign of injury). When I asked what happened, she admitted that she'd kicked him at least twice, with shoes on.

She felt that the dog should apologise. I pointed out that she had started kicking him, so if anything she should apologise. She said that he should apologise first. We left it there.

Now, 2 hours laters, she's come to me and said 'Mum. I apologised to P-A-T....'

Righto.

Sometimes it's so obscure though. She says 'Mum are we going to....H-O-M??

Errr.... Turns out she means 'reading homework'

Yesterday, she said 'Mum can I have some...' and tapped her foot three times on the ground. Apparently, I was meant to work out that she was tapping the syllables of 'orange cake'.

And, and, and, she whistles me. Like a dog.

I'm possibly not coping with her because I'm in post-migraine fog. But seriously...a woman has limits!!

No that's fine..... you rant away!

Coping with that is most definitely above and beyond the call of duty!

How long has the spelling been going on No wonder you have migraines!!

I remember when dd2 threw our dog all he way down the stairs. She lived to tell the tale. Somehow.

dog I mean, not dd2

Not the same but ds1 has decided to lose the first letter or every word when he talks. It is driving me to distraction.....

The spelling has been around for the last 4-5 months, I think. But it's getting more and more frequent, as she gets more confident with spellings. The trouble is that the word she spells can be any word within the context of the subject. SO, today they had a pantomime, Aladdin, at school. She needed £1.50 to watch it. She could have said 'Mum...have you remembered the:

P-A-N (pantomime)
P-L-A (play)
A-L-A (Aladdin)
M-O-N (Money)
P-E-N (Pennies)
S-H-O (Show)

It's so random that I have to think of all the possibilities for the three letters and work out the context, etc.

The whistling is particularly tuneless. Always the same whistle. Worsened by the fact that she normally whistles me when she thinks I'm ignoring her, but in fact, she is trying to interrupt someone else talking to me

Patch is remarkably tolerant of our children. But even he gives me a look sometimes

I'm sorry, lougle, but it made me (albeit a wry one!)

Been there, done that. For bloody years with dd1 (she still will just jump into the middle of whatever scenario she's laying out in her head and say something like 'yesterday on Friday a long time ago, if the road was closed we didn't go to buy bananas because of school'. Which actually means 'a few months ago on a Friday we had to take a different route home from school because of roadworks, so we didn't drive past the supermarket'

And that's a clear sentence from dd1, after years of intensive targeted effort!

Dd2 drives me quietly mad because she has a similar habit to the foot tapping example you give - she will say, for eg, are we having

Oh yes, the exaggerated miming with massive lip movements - I hadn't mentioned that yet. We have it. In spades.

Perhaps we could get them together - they could lip mime at each other and we could sneak into the kitchen and sip tea.

I think what makes it more bizarre is that I've got DD1 who's 8, who has speech delays and resorts to signing and gesticulating for stuff.

Then I've got DD2, who's 6 and does the initial letters, foot tapping, miming and whistling.

Then I've got DD3, who's 4, who speaks like a 10 year old, with amazing clarity, grammar, sophisticated vocabulary and turn of phrase...

It's quite disorientating!

For instance, DD3 can be a bit of a handful at bedtime and I said to her 'DD3, I'm not feeling well today, please be really good for Daddy at bedtime.'

She leaned in for a hug, kissed me, and said 'I will Mummy. Get well. Get better soon.' Then I asked her whether she'd done phonics at school today. She said 'Mmm..yes, but only a little bit. We did speed sounds, or, should I say, 'fast sounds'.'

Lougle, sorry but this made me laugh too, it is exasperating.

Dd2 does a similar thing, and I have always related it to her stammer (which she had speech therapy, and which has calmed down a lot) - so instead of stammering at the beginning of a word or blocking at the beginning of a word, she will say 'mum I need a P-O-O' - i think the spelling thing for her is a way of slowing her brain down so she can speak smoothly (of course it has the completely opposite effect)

She also uses made up gobbledygook words when she is 'stuck' so,

me - how was school today dd2
dd2 - it was uh mangola - la lovely

me - do want cereal or bagel
dd2 - baraksha, mmm bagel

I have a feeling people are actually going to start thinking she is speaking some kind of Eastern European/English hybrid.

Maybe we should all just start communicating in semaphore.

oh lawks, DD fucks about with language too

l-um-p-ee = lumpy

st-i-ck-ee = sticky

and made up words when you need her to make a decision - me: DD, what shall we have for dinner? DD - bampyspoons

t'is most infuriating

Lougle that is really cute

This made me smile - nice that something does at the moment!

DS1(9) whistles for me all the time, like I am some fucking dog. It irritates me no end but I don't think he realises how annoying it is despite me telling him repeatedly! He sees it as a verbal sign equivalent to talking. And he randomly knocks syllables on the table instead of giving me any clue to the word. Which always bemuses me - as IF I am going to understand?!

And he spells things out too. Always when we are in a hurry/high stress situation. And he is really bad at spelling so it can take me awhile to work it out. I end up going "will you just SAY the WORD!!!" Then feel bad for not encouraging the dreaded literacy.

And DS2, who is only two, is so different just like your DD3

Me: Do you want something to eat?
DS1: w-o-t y-e-w g-o-t? (or maybe he spells in out incorrectly back to front in air writing)
Ds2:No thank you Mummy. Maybe later I have something. I a bit full now. Got a big tummy like you.

Then I go to the kitchen and swig from my vodka bottle.

This has really made me laugh out loud and I didn't realise it was such a thing that some other children do too!

Ds is 4 and has a speech and language delay and immature speech so is quite hard to understand anyway, But now he does this mouthing too or whispering to you and it is impossible to understand what he's getting at as so much he talks about is out of context anyway!

He also exchanges words in requests randomly and again out of context and with no clue to what he may be referring to. An example was he had renamed the iPad a fast (even though can say ipad) but told no one this then spent days requesting a fast until finally we worked out what he was referring to. He won't lead you there or gesture to it either!

I say 'use words' too, Polter In fact, I had to say it to DD1, this morning. She was air writing like your DS, MyFabulousBoys!

DS1 acts like a bloody useless autocorrect. A conversation would go something along the lines of:

Us: That looks like an aspidistra
DS1: Did you say Patsy distra?
Us: ASPIdistra
DS1: Patsy distra. What's a Patsy distra?
Us: An Aspidistra is a plant
DS1: But what's a Patsy Distra?
Us: Something oyu made up.

We have several of these every day. If we ignore, he persists until the conversation is complete.

ds has started this.

i want to go hom-e (home, short o,+ short e phoneme) (at least I know he is learning to spell)

an uh, uh uh is hot coss bum, uh, uh could be muffin or cumpet. it is so annoying, and yes he gets told that if he uses words I will understand better...