Run-up to Tribunal

[TOWIELA]

I'm now one week away from Tribunal. Has any one got any tips for the day?

From my time on here, I've learnt that I should wear my best "mumsy" clothes. Hmmm that's difficult as I either have office/suit clothes or very very comfy casuals. I was thinking a summer dress?

I've also read that I should take food and water - water so I don't have to queue up with "them" near the water machine.

Any other tips to cope with the day? Am I allowed my massive lever-arch file into the Tribunal room? And my handbag/briefcase?

Yes. TBH I have heard of phonecalls being made in the tribunal as well as texting (LA side obviously) though whether the judge would allow that or not would be up to them.

If you're represented don't expect to say very much until the end. Take some post-its to scribble points on that can either remind you or can be passed to other people (the LA will probably do this lots, telling each other what to say ).

The hearing is quite informal - a meeting/conference room rather than a formal court. There is a video on youtube.

The main thing is to present the image that you are not all sat in that room because you have worked/fought tirelessly for years but because of the needs of the child (in order to preserve the myth that all parents, rather than the determined few, can equally access resources for geninue need).

You are expected to take a back seat and let the evidence and your advocate do the talking. Play the role - it is just one day. Also it will drive the LA mad. They know that most parents give up and therefore you are the reason why there is an appeal to answer. The basic argument of the LA is likely to be that the severity of difficulty does not warrant the provision because they have got away with giving less provision to more severe children. The panel have never met you before and will accept what is before them. The LA are likely to have formed a different perception but it is difficult for them to argue otherwise when you appear to be reasonable and open to suggestion if not downright passive and compliant.

Good luck next week. You are very well prepared but sadly this does not guarantee successful outcome. Fingers crossed and honks

yes you can take in your handbag and all of your papers - i had a big box full on the floor. deffo take something to eat/drink - get there early so you can bag a room. we were the only tribunal on the floor on the day so we could not escape the LA and yes we did all have ot share the same coffee machine- i just stayed in the room. take post it notes to scribble on. my witnesses were passing note to me.

if you are not represented - be prepared to say something at the beginning although i didnt. and then end you have to sum up. i just spoke from the heart rather than from a script although did have a few post it notes to remind me what to say.

remember the 5 main points you want to get across and make sure you get them across. do not get angry or accuse the other side of lying - try and take it on the chin if they say something to upset you. just come across as a calm, concerned , reasonable parent.

i did take a picture of my son and the panel asked to see one - i know others dont agree with that but i took one so i was prepared if they did ask. i represented myself and was surprised at how little i actually did say then panicked afterwards that i hadnt said enough. it was the LA witnesses who got grilled. be prepared for messing around in the morning - we didnt get started until 11am as final amendments to the working document was made.

remember some of the LA witnesses will be more nervous than you are and the tribunal is the last place they want to be.

its nerve wracking at the time but now looking back it wasnt that bad - the build up to it all is the worse part but the hearing itself was fine. the panel knew the case inside out and had the LA number from the start and they asked very relevant questions.

good luck xxx

I also had a photo and they did ask for it as well.

I just really hope you'll get a reasonable judge! Spoke to SOS!SEN regarding our situation and they knew our judge, he has bad reputation. So fingers crossed for you!!

Have you got an advocate? You will still be the person who knows all the facts so the post-its are a good idea.

Panels vary massively. We pulled out of ours as they listed the hearing, the afternoon before, 25 miles away! By then, we knew we were looking for another school anyway as they were all getting together to lie about provision - SLT, LA, school.

We asked the Panel to deal with it on the papers and they were so crap, they forgot to even deal with Pt 4! Mainly because of their desire to tell the LA and its pretty young lying SLT how fragrant and lovely they were and how 'difficult' we were - despite substantial evidence our son was not even getting the provision in his statement.

I think an advocate will help prevent you getting homicidal!

My panel asked for a photo at the start - I guess it helps them remember that this hearing is about a child.

My hearing involved sharing a waiting room - not with the LA but poor bastards, with no rep or expert witnesses, defending DLA claims

Thanks everyone for your very helpful advice.

Post-it notes sound an excellent idea.

I found the Youtube video and that was very useful to watch. Although the room did look very cramped so maybe they were right to refuse my grown-up children to be observers.

I didn't know there'd be waiting rooms. I've only ever been to court once before as a supporter for a friend going through a very contentious divorce. I spent the entire day in a small waiting room which we used as a base whilst her and her barrister popped in and out of the court room trying to negotiate her settlement.

I have a barrister, SLT, EP & OT. So am feeling a bit at a loose end not really knowing my role! Having 5 main points I want to get across is an excellent idea for me - even if I don't get to say it.

I am absolutely sure that at least one of their witnesses is going to be very very nervous because she told me and my EP one thing, but now she's toeing the party line.

I keep telling myself that if doesn't produce the result which is best for my DC, then at least I know I've done everything in my power over the last 18 months to help him.

I must admit MNSN has stopped me becoming totally homicidal because of the ability to post parts of our story here! If I hadn't let some of out here (and on PM), then I think I'd be going into the room with the sole intention of ripping off heads! Instead I'll waft in on a cloud of concerned but totally reasonable parent.

I have a barrister, SLT, EP & OT. You have got it sorted!!! And you are such a sensible, reasonable parent too

I'm always slightly uneasy about the photo thing. I can see why they do it, but, really, it's the evidence they are considering not a photo and it is all a bit twee and 'un-legal'.

On the subject - anyone fancy doing a 'how to prepare for Tribunal' piece for the blog??

IE - I'd love to read a blog post - it's the little things that matter! For example, my SALT has also told me to go with tissues "just in case" I blabber (she knows me too well! ) I think I might need them for their EP & school witness too cos they've already blabbered in front of me once before (when I individually told them my DS's story)

Oh and for the record. I am NEVER reasonable when any of my DC are discussed or my 23 years of being a parent comes under fire

i was told to go with tissues but somehow on the day this inner peace came upon me and i was just so focused. i had the LA side throw around comments about our parenting - just showed how desperate they were but i just didnt rise to it - just sat there and took it on the chin. i did let of steam in our room though!!!

you have an excellent team - same as mine albeit i had no barrister but the LA did. mine was david v goliath - all of my witnesses admitted afterwards they didnt think we would win due to the huge cost difference - it was 50k a year difference. the panel were fine - think we got a good one but they were so poker faced and we walked out feeling we had lost and the most difficult part was the 2 week wait as i was then certain we had lost - just shows you cannot read it at all.

I was bored and trying not to yawn as the HT was fulfilling her brief to talk as slowly as possible about all the details of the national curriculum as if she personally invented it.

I always dressed smartly but not over the top - what you wear will not influence the outcome of the tribunal as the panel is supposed to consider just the evidence on the table. I do think it's important to look reasonably smart and don't see why you have to look mumsy at all.

I was so anxious in the week before tribunal. However once it started I felt at ease. It was finally a proper opportunity to be heard.

You will know your child and your evidence so much better than the opposition will which will be a great advantage. Like someone said above the LA witnesses are likely to be nervous. I remember when we were discussing the number of hours ds should receive. The LA slipped up and went on talking on and on digging themselves in deeper. I didn't really have to say much when it came to me.

I didn't bring a picture and was not asked for one. I went with smart casual clothes. I followed advice and brought water in but LA retreated to their room quickly at the break which gave us full access to the vending machine. I only brought the tribunal bundle with me as that is all the panel will look at (however I was not fighting part 4). I got those bookmark post its to mark bits I might need to find quickly and regular post its for making noted which was useful. Are you meeting your team before?

On thing that did make me feel better about the prospect of losing was the face that if the provision that they fought so hard to prove would work didn't work it would provide evidence to get what we wanted at a later date if that makes any sense. However you have a great team and will be fine good luck!

Thank you everyone for your advice. It really is helpful to hear from others that have been there. I'm the type that, when under pressure, panics over little inconsequential things (such as knowing to bring water with me!) So having your tips really is helping me calm down.

On the run-up to tribunal I tried to see things from the perspective of the other side, the argument that I would present if I were a heartless bastard in their position.

My LA had submitted a further response and had revealed their hand - how can you even think of an anxious child who has been out of school for 2 terms boarding occ? ie any 'normal' mum would not behave this way so it follows that you are not normal but are diagnosis chasing, exaggerating, want indi education at tax-payers expense etc. Prepare responses to what may be difficult questions so you are not blind-sided on the day.

Aside from the suitability of the LA named school/unit, there are likely that to be other factors such as the distance of the parental preference or the age/year of the child that can lead to the panel making 'conservative' rulings.

You need to keep returning to the fact that DS is out of school, that you want him in school asap, given previous history and level of need this needs to be the right school, the risk of failed placement to a school he has never attended is too great, he ought to remain at the placement (what age does the LA named school go up to - what secondary provision would there be etc) without further transition. Plus the importance of positive motivation and what the child wants.

Thanks Keep. Really useful. I've been thinking of all the blind-side arguments they are going to be throwing at me,

Yep I've already spotted this one how can you even think of an anxious child who has been out of school for boarding Already major twisting of what I told the LA EP, which was submitted hours before evidence deadline. I don't want weekly boarding but the EP has written that I told her I do!

Yep - have had this one too want indi education at tax-payers expense. This is despite the LA provision being more expensive than indie.

Hmmm to this one distance of the parental preference This one is my big problem one.

(what age does the LA named school go up to - what secondary provision would there be etc) without further transition Lawyers haven't wanted to use this argument because they think it's too far in the distance but I will as we will have to be thinking of secondary provision in 18 months time (and I've been fighting primary provision for 18 months)

Thanks - keep heading 'em my way

Layers! The building I was in was like a sauna in the tribunal room but the A/C made the waiting room like an igloo & made me sneeze! neither environment helped my nerves at all.

On the same note, as you are likely to be nervous wear comfy stuff (no diggy-in waist bands or ladder as soon as you glance at em hosiery etc). Nerves can make the smartest get up look awful if you are constantly figigity, (you may have to sit on your hands and bite your lip at the audacity of the LA at times). If you have long hair tie it back to remove the desire to play with it. Well polished, but flatish shoes to avoid tripping due to nerves too.

Smartish black/navy trousers (to avoid the laddered tights look), cheerful coloured cotton twinset and flat shoes covers the vagaries of nerves, sick buildings without making you look too much like either a hot shot city type, or so Mumsy and frumpy you wanna puke. Check your nails look neatly manicured with a neutral polish as your hands will be on show as you take notes (not the time for long red talons).

Bochead - thanks for the advice! That's very useful. I tend to sweat like a pig glow when I'm nervous.

Most of my non-very very comfy casual clothes tend to be hot shot city type clothes (a long distant throw back from when I had a career before having to home ed). So I'm going for the summer dress I wore for DC1's graduation - not quite strappy beachwear but smart enough to do. If I'm feeling very daring I'll top it with a large hat and flowery corsage and pretend I'm at DC1's graduation again

It's nearly the big day and I'm nearly ready

• I have my best mumsy clothes (summer dress - too hot for anything more formal!)
• I have my evidence bundle - over 1,000 pages of evidence! All neatly labelled up with Post-It index tags.
• I have my pens, notepad and post-it notes
• Got my photo of my DS

Food, water & tissues still to be bought

Any more tips or hints?

Still not any form of communication whatsoever from the LA since Evidence Deadline nearly a month ago.

Fingers crossed for you.

Good luck op!

No advice but good luck!

Good luck and remember that this is not a war of personalities and egos, even if the LA try and make it so. It's an appeal to Sensible People that the LA are not being Sensible.

Good luck. Was thinking earlier when your tribunal was so thought I would check I. To see. Sending you lots of positive vibes your way for today