Not allowed to talk about anything to do with DD's school on any social networking sites.....

[StarlightMcKenzie]

And I have to sign something to say that a)I won't, and b)I acknowledge I could be prosecuted.

Any thoughts?

I'm a bit worried about sending dd to a school with such a gagging order.

And, have I just breeched the terms and conditions already?

We'll be thinking of secondary soon enough. I'm scouring the league tables looking for the best schools.
My criteria are the worst ofsted, A'level lowest-performing, and/or highest % of FSM / EAL / SEN etc

The subjects of the 1971 demographic bulge were mating

ROFL

I think that plus the beginning of recession and redundancies making it a career decision for many women who were planning on pregnancies but 'waiting for the right time'.

Starlight It's a sodding nightmare isn't it! I detest homevisits - pointless snooping activity I think... so I'd be happy not to have one. However, I would not be happy about their attitude - it shows a total lack of ability to work with you. I wouldn't send a child into that environment. I'd be putting her name down on the waiting list elsewhere.

Idiots.

Polter - associated discrimination only applies to direct discrimination and not the need to make reasonable adjustments for a disability.

So it doesn't apply in my case?

The problem is that direct discrimination means what it says, you have to treat someone differently because of their disability.

You have to approach it this way:

Imagine Ms X rings up school and says, I can't do home visit on that day because I am working and school says, we can't re-arrange, it is a one-off thing, so you've had it.

Then Ms Y rings and says I can't do home visit on that day because I have to collect my child who has a disability from school and school says, we can't re-arrange, it is a one-off thing, so you've had it.

The reason they are saying no to re-arranging is because they are arses, not because of the disability.

If the reasonable adjustment duty applied to associated discrimination, Ms Y could say well you have to make an exception (a reasonable adjustment) in my case because of my child's disability.

But the reasonable adjustment duty does not apply so they are just arses.

Did you notice the technical language - I have got multiple degrees in the language of 'arses'

So my email should really say:

Just sending an email to clarify that the reason I am unavailable for a home visit is due to our responsibility to or ds at that time.

I am sorry that you have chosen to be arses.

How about:

Just sending an email to clarify that the reason I am unavailable for a home visit is due to our responsibility to our disabled ds at that time.

I am sorry that you could not accommodate this as it places carers at a significant disadvantage.

They won't know jackshit about the EA. That's a technical term too.

I agree with Mumlulu's list and would sadly have to decline the place and sit it out on a waiting list for elsewhere. Too many red flags methinks & it's horrid once the child has started to fall out.

No way would I sign any gagging clause, out of sheer principle tbh (I don't even have a FB account). If the schools alright, then why the need to shut you up before you even walk through the gates?

I am the most awful suspicious person since battling for DS and reading what goes on around our SN corner with regards to some schools and if I am honest I wouldnt touch this one with a barge pole x Follow your instincts you are good at that :)

Would not ever sign something so Orwellian in nature. Even the Americans would not do this.

I'd also be looking at other schools for your DD. This place could well become a DFS - disaster from the start.

Can't persuade DH.......

He can sign the stupid thing then!

Why not?

What part of this does he find acceptable?

What part of this leads him to believe that they will work with you to accommodate DD's needs?

Why is he getting the final say?

How involved is he with her schooling?

Sent email. Lost enthusiasm for home visit.

Doubt it will be DFS though as dd is probably one of their desired cohort. Autumn born articulate and confident girl who tells the teachers every 5 minutes how much she appreciates whatever activity they have laid out and gets cross on the last day of the week as weekends are boring and she 'wants to learn things'.

He thinks it is a small price to pay for an 'excellent school'.

I guess we differ in our interpretation of excellent.

Did you ask him how them being completely unprepared to change the date of a home visit makes it an 'excellent' school?

Does he just think this is about you being able to post on MN?

No. I don't think so.

I think he thinks that they are being like this because the home visit isn't important, so they're not prepared to bust a gut for something so worthless, and that they have either had a 'situation' regarding facebook that they are trying to avoid repeating or it was just ill thought out.

Hmm strange, I'm guessing they have had similar happen before then? makes you ponder a bit about what that could of been about?

I find it slightly unsettling that they need to cover their arses just incase

Star, if I were you, I'd be looking to find a more flexible, accommodating school for DD.

With the best will and the most spiffing organisational skills in the WOrld, having a child with additional needs often means that you get called to do things with them unexpectedly. This call often (IME!) happens just at the time when you should be colllecting your other child/ren from their local school. That's when you need them to be sensitive and accommodating. The rigid, inflexible rules they are already imposing suggest to me that they won't take too kindly to a last-minute call at 3.15 telling them you're at DS's SS dealig with an emergency incident, so can they please keep DD safe for half an hour while you sort something out?

Although the local school my youngest two attend has many failings, I know in an emergency they'll look after my two, keep them safe, happy, fed and occupied so they don't worry about where Mummy is. They even offered to bring my two homw the other week when DS1 ran away. That is so much more reassuring than anything OFSTED might say!