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SN children

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Original poster

I know there are worse things in the world but feel so teary - Lotbags has to wear glasses :-(

70 replies

Thomcat · 26/05/2006 21:38

I know it's silly, I know that in the grand scale of things it doesn't mater and so many people are going through much, much bigger things, ............ but .............

I just feel gutted.

a) it'll be a living nightmare trying to get her to wear them. Zero tolerance for anything like that. I'm sure we'll get there but it really will be awful battling with her day after day. it's upsetting, draining etc, etc, you all know what I mean I'm sure.

b) It's one more thing the poor love has to contend with. She's forced to walk and stand every day, being pushed every which ay and now she has to contend with this as well, it just seems so unfair and love is f'ing bitch.

c) If there are any nasty little kids at her new school in September it's just one more thing for them to pick on.
The short kid with the funny walk who can't talk properly and wears glasses

I just love her so much and I want to preotect he and I want everything to be ok. I've been dreading this day.

I know there are worse things happen at sea and all that, you know me, I always try and see the positive and all that, but today just feels like a shit day, and I'm allowing myself a moment of -

I f'ing hate that she has to wear glasses, I wish she didn't have Down's syndrome, life is a wanker and why us.

(Doesn't help that Lotbags ghas been up at between 4.15am and 5.15 every day this week, so extra tired and emotional)

Life - if you are listening - piss off and leave us alone now will you.

OP posts:

Original poster

Thomcat · 30/05/2006 22:48

I know exactly what you mean Piffle.
That sort of thing just makes me stick out my chest and hold my head a bit higherl iyswim? Like when we were given her wheelchair. OK I only used it a few times, (the bloody thing is ridiculous and I can barely lift it into the car) but people stared at us, a lot more. It just made me walk even taller than I do already in a deensive '@*%+ you' way. So am ready for even more 'sympathetic' smiles from joe public. The sort of '"arrrrrr, look at your cute Down's baby, poor you, aren't you brave, how do you cope????' look/smile.

Whatever to all that.

Like you say, it's just one mor thing they have to contend with and it's kinda like, 'thanks a f'ing lot life, and what do you have up yur sleeve for her next aye, can't you just pick on someone your own size?"!!

Hey ho.

OP posts:

Piffle · 30/05/2006 22:51

But do you think Tc that all this somehow makes them a auperior kid
When I took dd to the GP the other day with raging high temp, croup and cold, she charmed the doc (she has seen 10000000001 since being born like)
AS we were about to leave, he said
"What a truly enchanting child she is"
I think you get told that too about Lottie no? :)
Not at 5am but hey ho...

Original poster

Thomcat · 30/05/2006 22:57

I do get told that a lot yes babes. And today, watching her in action when we were out in Windsor and then visiting relatives, she was enchanting, I can see that.

But LOL, no at 5am, or esp at 4.30 I would never use the word enchaning. i won't ell you the word i scream through my head as she bangs the handset into the telephne cradle on my bedside table, or says "mummy have, mummy have" over and ove and over as she passes me every object she an get her hands on!!!!!!!!!!!!

OP posts:

Piffle · 30/05/2006 23:06

And then you want to slap yourself cos ages ago you posted when will she ever begin to talk...
:)
I totally understand that one :)

Original poster

Thomcat · 30/05/2006 23:13

LOL!

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fattiemumma · 01/06/2006 00:09

ds has recently had to start wearing galsses too.

i had all the same reactions as you TC.

if he has a meltdown those are the first to go. he has onlyhad thema bout a montha dn already on his second pair....and have been in teh shop getting them fixed at least everyother day (thats on the days when i havent managed to fix them myself with the special watch makers screwdriver set i paid a fortune to buy because i was so embarassed at having to keep going into the shop)

anyway, its getting better and he looks really cute in them..very grown up.
and no one has so far been horrible about them. he is 5 so the kids in class aren't really old enough to understand glasses are a thing to be ridiculed....or at least i hope not.

alibubbles · 07/06/2006 09:27

My DS had to wear glasses from age 3, and have his eye patched, it wasn't a problem, but I understand where you are coming from with Lottie's other problems.

She probably won't feel any different, it is our perception as adults that makes us worry about what other kids think and say, and I know with the best will in the world, we can't protect our kids from teasing etc. I'm not putting this very well, but rest assured, I'm sure Lottie has got bags of personality and with such a winning smile she'll be fine.

BTW, I've just started to wear glassses full time, I can't wear lenses as I have no tear ducts, so my eyes don't water enough. I hated the idea, but have got used to it very quickly.

Hows the new kitten coming along?

Pages · 19/06/2006 21:16

We were gutted when told DS1 had to wear them but now we all think he looks dead cute in them. It IS just the battle to keep them on at the moment that's the problem. Have to say, it's a bit hit and miss. But maybe as they get older and realise they can see better with them on it get's easier, dunno.....

robinpud · 19/06/2006 21:25

I can sympathise with your anxiety, but as lots of other posters have said, most kids are desperate for glasses so they do give the wearer a little cachet don't you know. They are nothing like the awful blue or pink ones that used to be doled out. I had a class 2 years ago where 8 out of 26 wore glasses. I havn't come across anyone being unpleasant to a child with glasses and I have been teaching a long time. What I have seen time and time again in the right sort of schools is the kindness and compassion of small children to care for one another whatever their strengths. I am sure that your dd, who sounds as if shecould when the mood takes her, charm the birds out of the trees, will look just as beautiful in her glasses and will be just another kid on the playground playing alongside her friends in september.

Original poster

Thomcat · 19/06/2006 21:26

She looks ridiculous in them, all 3 of us cracked up laughng when she put them on.!!!!!!! 20 mins of poking her tounge out at herself in the mirror and fun and games and she hasn't gone back. All those around her, faily, school etc aren't convinced she really needs them. Not sure what to do just yet, am yet to decide. She hates wearign em though and seems to be able to see fine without them........

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Dingle · 19/06/2006 21:39

OH TC, Amelia only got hers on Friday. God knows how she will keep them on- whenever my back is turned, they are in her hand!

Did you see my thread with the pics, Amelia is loving looking over them at you, with a knowing look, just waiting for us to respond!!!

I have the summer holidays to prime her in them ready for school!!LOL!!! If you come across any good tips, please LMK!!

Original poster

Thomcat · 19/06/2006 21:55

Oh no - can you link me to thread with pics, please?

Doubtful on the tip front, but yeah, you let me know if you have any.
I'm not sure I'm evern going to perservere with them, I'm not sure she really needs them, none of us do. So hard to know what to do for the best.

Anyway, phote links pleeeeaseeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee

OP posts:

Dingle · 19/06/2006 22:00

It's a fairly recent thread, I'll quickly bump it TTT.

Amelia is supposedly having problems seeing at distances, on her eye test, we got to a certain distance and size and everything was an "apple" BUT she can spot her friends walking to school/nursery from half way down the road!!! She is such a little madam. Only time will tell.

hub2dee · 19/06/2006 22:07

I missed the beginning of this thread TC... And tbh, I'm glad, cos I would've felt very sad for you, LOL... am relieved life is currently a little sweeter ! I reckon it's the sun...

Anyway, glad the glasses look OK even if she never wears them !

Continue with the chill pill. X

Original poster

Thomcat · 19/06/2006 22:27

LOL Hub but they don't look ok, they look fucking awful!!!!!!!!!! Really they do. She looks terrible in them, bloody mad and very funny! Make her ears stick out even more and she has to skint and tilt her head up to keep them on and see through them! PMSL!

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marthamoo · 19/06/2006 22:42

Oh TC. Missed this and have only skimmed but...aw, not fair. I do know where you're coming from. But - and I haven't seen her in her specs so you'll only say "oh you don't know" but she is bloody gorgeous, your girl - if anyone can carry it off, she can.

You need sleep - everything is a million times harder when you're tired.

Fwiw, I was told I needed glasses at the age of 6 and I managed (kind of) without them 'til going to Uni 'cos I hated them so much. She'll cope - whether she wears them or not.

hub2dee · 20/06/2006 08:37

You'll have to give the glasses to one of MN's dodgy arts and crafters to, erm, 'enhance' them...

Oh dear. Maybe you can get a nice funky pair of sunglasses so she has 'nicer' ones for outside play and then she can be a funky chicken ?

AttilaTheMeerkat · 20/06/2006 10:07

Thomcat,

Lottie is beautiful regardless and the glasses will help her see better.

Actually films like Harry Potter have helped childrens' perceptions of people wearing glasses - it seems cool to do so these days.

BTW the target for the bike ride has now been exceeded:). Saw your thanks and would just like to say in response that you're very welcome!!.

With best wishes

AttilatheMeerkat xxx

bamboo · 20/06/2006 10:30

Interesting, Thomcat, that you say you're not convinced that she needs them. My brother has ds and when he was 4 or so they insisted he needed glasses - my mum went out and bought a really expensive pair, because she wanted him to look nice and not be disadvantaged any more than he already was. Anyhow the next eye test, a few months later he was pronounced fine! The initial test consisted of a woman hiding behind the settee rolling a ball which she expected him to follow by eye. He just sooo wasn't interested! You could almost see him thinking "Why on earth is this woman hiding behind the settee?. Does she think I'm stupid?" .

I'm not saying this is the case with your dd but FWIW my db looked lovely in his glasses and I think most kids that age are pretty accepting of others differences. Far more than a lot of adults anyhow.

merlot · 21/06/2006 15:22

Thomcat - Know how you feel too. Have only skimmed this thread. My little ds2 has a flickery eye ball and I have been told that they will probably patch the eye...like you I'm feeling not another bl**dy thing! What with the Chromosome duplication, grommets, hernia and now this!! As you say...sometimes its just a case of the final straw.

Your first post, sounded just like I feel..but your more recent ones sound more upbeat...and here's something to make you laugh...my eldest son (9 years, no special needs) WANTS braces for his teeth - `dead cool'. Well there is no accounting for taste is there!!!

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