TINSLEY HOUSE SUPPORT THREAD - PART 3!!!! :)

[Badvoc]

Well, here is the shiny new thread for all of us either doing the TH programme, doing part of it, or thinking about doing it! :)
A brief synopsis of stage 1 of the programme can be found in the books "is that my child?" Or "the brain food plan" by robin pauc;

Stage 1 of the TH therapy consists of:

1. Daily Multivitamins

• Omega
• Zinc & Magnesium

1. Healthy eating

• High protein, low sugar, no artificial sweeteners, additives etc.

1. Specific neuro development exercises done 3 times a day

• Takes about 4-5 mins

And that's it :)

Stage 2 involves computer programmes to sort out eye tracking and convergence which over 80% of children with reading/writing problems have.

• www.engagingeyes.co.uk

We are coming to the end of our time doing TH I reckon...certainly by the end of the summer I think. It has been in many ways much easier than I thought at the beginning but of course takes commitment and time.

I am so glad we "took the plunge". It has made such a difference to ds and to our lives :)

Bet mine from amazon on subscribe and save (also means I don't forget and run out :))

Thanks for the tip .

We also saw Robin two or three times and now Skype. The first two appointments are quite pricy but we now pay £70 every 8 weeks so not too bad.

Hi all - been away for a while (actually abroad away. working for a bit and also in a bit of a funny place with it all as DS's tics were really getting me down). Last few weeks of term were a bit mental with him suddenly getting a lot worse with his mouth tic then developping all these touching things twice, touching things with his right then his left hand, stuff he's never done before and freaked me out.

Robin was very reassuring and told me just to relax, and follow the program. And time away on holiday has been great for us all - to relax and take a break from everything (including Engaging Eyes as we had no wi-fi)!

However in amongst my stress about tics and other people noticing and DS being potentially teased, we've had some great stuff which I mustn't lose sight of. He won a medal at sports day!! Never won anything before and for the first time could complete the obstacle course - usually forgets what to do half way through. He's become a complete book worm and reads chapters at a time which is superb. And a friend who used to find his shyness rather an eyeroll said to me at the end of term what a different child he is. At the dentist yesterday he embarked on this conversation with the Dentist about the book he's reading and almost would not shut up - I nearly found myself saying 'OK that's enough' then realised what an amazing thing this was!

He's still tic-ing and it still bothers me so I have to just hope it will stop as others have experienced.

Who is it who does extra B6 and 12 supps? What do yours take? I read tics can be helped by extra mag and b vits.

We're also embarking on a bit of a Gluten Free thing at the mo. Do those who are GF/CF do it when they're out to tea etc? I can control it at home without much trouble but don't know what to do when they're out!

Oh - and where are you all with the meet up?

Toffee- Welcome to the thread. So sorry your DS is having so many problems.You have made a great start, buying the Brain Food Plan. All the problems you describe your son as having are symptoms of what Robin calls Developmental Delay Syndrome. He has treatments for all of these things and I am sure he can help your son.As the others have said, I would suggest you get started with the stair exercise and the diet and supplements. I would suggest VEGEPA ( pure EPA no DHA) zinc and magnesium. Will your son eat fish fingers? If so fish fingers, baked beans and an egg would make a great breakfast. The stairs is an extremely powerful exercise. Start tomorrow and let us know how you get on. The teeth is usually prescribed by Robin as a few ( 3%) of children have to do it on their right leg and with right hand. Saying that, it sounds like he will need to do LEFT as described by Shoppingbags. Toffee- you have everything to gain and nothing to loose. Get started as best you can tomorrow and keep us posted. We are here for you everyday. BTW stairs can be done by any child so does not need to be prescribed.

Harriet- I do extra B vits. I use Biocare B Complex 25 ( it used to be called Junior) They are capsules and I am very pleased with them. They definately helped with my son's anxiety.

Sorry I won't be able to do the summer meet up but we are away.

Dear friends.
My beloved dad suddenly collapsed and died yesterday afternoon.
Later today I have to tell Tom his pop is gone.
My mother (they were married for 42 years) had a heart attack last night and is in hospital.
Please pray if you can

Badvoc, I am so sorry. How devastating for you and the family. I am thinking of you all. I can't even begin to know how you tell your boy something like that.

When you have the chance and feel up to it, please let us know how your mum is

Xx

Badvoc - Words feel inadequate for this, but I am so, so sorry. That is just dreadful. My own father died a few years ago and I still remember the shock and overwhelming grief.

I think children can surprise you at times like this. I have had to tell my DS1 about the death of each of his grandfathers. He saw both me and my DH cry (impossible to hide it) and realised it was natural. He insisted on coming to my father's funeral (he was nine by then and we offered him the choice). He wanted to be a part of the grieving and he has never regretted it.

Your poor mum. As Daft says, please let us know how she is when you can.

xx

Badvoc I'm so sorry to hear about your dad, and your mother. All of my thoughts and sympathy are with you and your family.

Thank you.
Mum has had her angiogram and there is no blockage which is good.
She will probably be in for 3 days or so.
My sister gets back Late tonight so she can go and visit tomorrow.
I feel numb.

I'm not surprised you feel numb, Badvoc. It's a very natural reaction. It's too much to process at once.

I hope you can get a little rest when your sister visits your mum tomorrow. You will need to sleep when you can. You must feel exhausted. Your mum is in good hands in the hospital and you need to look after yourself too.

Again, I'm so sorry about your dad.

Have told the boys.
Ds2 (4) doesn't really understand. He was more worried about playing pirates of the Caribbean on the ps3. He won't remember dad and that breaks my heart.
Tom seems ok. He cried a lot. He is currently eating pizza.

Poor Tom .

Was just reading through and catching up on all the chat when I saw your awful news Badvoc. Can I extend my sincere condolences to your family. It must have been such a shock for all you - grief is such gnawing, numbing thing. I will pray for you all and really hope that your Mum is on the mend. xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

Thank you.
My sister should be back @ 11pm.
My brother and I may go and see her if she wants us to.
I need to sleep and I can't.

so so sorry to hear the news Badvoc. Love, hugs and prayers for you all x

Oh Badvoc, I am so very very sorry to hear about your dear Dad and your mum. What a terrible shock and a tragic loss. My Dad collapsed and died whilst on holiday abroad in December 2003 and my poor mum died 16 days later whilst I was 8 weeks pregnant with DD. I shall light a candle in Church for your mum and dad tomorrow. xxxx

Thank you all.
I am sorry to hear of your losses.
Just spoken with my sister....she is devastated.
It seems so unreal.
Like a bad episode of eastenders or something.

Badvoc - I am so very sorry to hear about your Dad and your Mum. I will be thinking of your family. Best wishes.

Ladies - can I please pick your collective brains about something?
This time it is about DS and not DD!

DS is nearly 7. He is one of the youngest in his year and is about to go in to Y3.

He has always been a 'sensitive' soul. But he does OK. Levels 2's across the board this year at school. Has friends, gets on with other children, has an inquisitive mind.

He has always had a problem with feeling sensitive. So for example he will have a meltdown as his socks feels uncomfortable. This has been since he was about 2 I would think, but recently it has moved on to his trousers and he will now only wear tracksuit trousers.

The worry now is that he is obsessing about touching things twice.
So if I touch his arm I have to touch his other arm or things don't feel even. He describes that the other side with feel lighter/heavier.

I have to kiss two cheeks. He will walk around touching things twice. This has probably happened in the last 3 months and is getting a bit ridiculous now.
He was upset this morning as he wanted to eat his breakfast holding the spoon with both hands. He turned the tap off with 2 hands. You probably get the picture.

I will admit that I am not good at handling it and get upset/frustrated with him. DH is all up for ignoring, but I think it is an extension of his sock sensitivity.

Anyway - does anyone have any experience of this and does anyone have any ideas what I can do to help (he does want me to help and to not feel this way).

I have heard of body brushing and wondered if it might help?

Thanks All. x

Beautiful ? that is fantastic news. We?re the same with holidays ? last year it was all quite hellish and now its tons easier. Really enjoy it, you all deserve it so much.

Hi Toffee. Sorry I?ve missed you over the last couple of days, but welcome! My DS was so anxious before we started TH and his nightmares stopped almost immediately. That is really sad about not going out ? that must be really difficult for all you. Like others, I found the diet part far easier than I anticipated. DS was all of a sudden up for different foods. A slightly different story with DD, but she has lots of rituals and does eventually get there?

Prince We do brushing with DS as well as TH. 5 mins brushing on the face with an artist-style brush - morning and night. DS really enjoys it and says it tickles, but is ok. This is the lady we see. Our DD has a few OCD and ritual tendencies and is doing the TH programme too. Robin is very confident that they will be ironed out as she is making great progress. She has a lot of rituals surrounding food and he said not to pander to them - easier said than done though! I find them very frustrating. Very happy to chat on phone about it all.

Some great friends had a chat with me on Friday to tell me that I worry too much about DS ? that he went through a rocky patch but has grown out of it and I can start breathing again! I know we've got a long way to go, but it is great to hear such positive comments from friends. I used to be very anxious about no wanting to play with us! Also, we went to the theatre and there were lots of flashing lights - sort of dance thing and all very close ? sitting on floor next to it. He loved it! I could not have imagined this last autumn.

How does everyone feel about Sunday? Any takers or should we postpone until more folk can come?

It's good to hear of those of you who are managing to go on holiday this year. We had to cancel ours this year because of DS1's issues (and then ended up having to pay 2/3rds of the cost because the holiday flat wasn't re-let ). We have given up on holidays for now.

Prince - sorry, but that sounds very OCD-ish to me (DS1 has OCD and describes things not feeling 'right' and needing to make things even). CBT (which DS1 is having now) would say that you shouldn't 'collude' by helping your DS with his rituals and you need to encourage him to cope with the anxiety of not doing them. Also, I agree with your DH about ignoring them and not showing annoyance (they will be annoying your DS even more than you). Easier said than done, I know, which is why it's good to have a therapist to help. I hope the Tinsley House programme will help you.

Ruggles - thank you for the welcome. It's so encouraging to hear how much the programme helped with your DS's anxieties. At the moment, DS is practising learning to put up with high levels of anxiety and not reinforce them by avoidance, but it's really tough. It would be even better if he just didn't get so anxious all the time. Him not going out is very difficult, but not as bad now he's 13 and can be left alone for an hour or two. Also, my MIL moved here a year or so ago and she's a great babysitter. When the anxiety started, however, DS1 was only nine and couldn't be left alone. His younger brother missed out on a lot then because we were stuck at home all the time.

Have just received 'The Brain Food Plan', so am going to go and read it now...

Badvoc - I hope you managed to get some sleep last night. Glad your sister will be with you today.

Thanks Toffee.
We have actually been doing TH for about 7 months with our DD.
We have seen great progress and I have always had questions in my head around whether it would be good for DS too. But as he has no educational issues it seems silly to pursue it.

I am watching him now. He seems so worried.
He just had a day at holiday club and came out just not like a happy child should.
He seems so worried by the world and has lost his joy.
He is now playing his computer (his favourite activity) and is using both hands to control the mouse - not something he has done before.

My poor DS I just want to help him.

If anyone else has any insight it would be great.
I may have a chat with Robin and see what he says.

I'm sorry your DS is suffering, Prince. I know exactly what you mean about knowing that your son is not right. If he is feeling heightened anxiety and performing OCD rituals, it will be exhausting for him and he won't seem happy. I think it's a good idea to chat to Robin about it.

I have used this book with DS2 when he became very worried about things and this one with DS1 when his OCD first started. It might be worth reading whichever one you think is most suitable to your DS. My DS2 particularly enjoyed having 15 minutes' 'worry time' with me every day after school (from the first book).

I am intending to do some of the Robin Pauc programme with DS2 as well, even though he doesn't have the same issues as DS1. Unlike DS1, he doesn't have any educational issues or OCD/anxiety. However, he does have tics and I want to make sure he has a good chance of not developing the same problems as DS1.

I have been speed reading 'The Diet Plan' and feeling all excited at the prospect of a new project to help DS1 (ever hopeful). DS1 is not so happy about it. He says he is still going to drink Coke, which I never wanted him to buy for himself anyway. I think I will have to summarise the book for him and explain how it will help him.

A while back, badvoc mentioned a flapjack recipe made with sugar and condensed milk. I can't see this included in 'The Diet Plan'. Does anyone know if it's ok to include in the diet? Was planning to make it tonight.

Badvoc, so so sorry to hear your sad news. I'll be thinking of you all.
Toffeewhirl, the flapjack recipe isn't in the plan but slow release snacks with oats in are good and you can experiment with reducing the sugar. I make banana bread for the dcs too and have reduced the sugar a little a each time without them noticing ( black bananas are sweeter so good for this)
Prince, sorry to hear your worries about your ds. I would definitely give Robin a ring. It does sound like he's suffering, bless him :(