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Here are some suggested organisations that offer expert advice on special needs.

MNHQ have commented on this thread

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Here are some suggested organisations that offer expert advice on special needs.

MNHQ have commented on this thread

SN children

Can we talk about MNSN, and the community/support/chat etc?

999 replies

silverfrog · 05/03/2013 11:23

This thread may not be a good idea. I am severely sleep deprived (ds has decided yet again that sleep is for the weak, and I have had about 4 hours sleep since Sunday), and had the morning from hell getting dd2 off on a school trip - change of routine, needed ot wear tracksuit not uniform, different drop off/pick up - you all know the score. If you all think it is a bad idea, please feel free to report and have it deleted.

Anyway.

Can we have a thread where we try to sort out some of the perceived isues with MNSN?

I keep seeing, on the main boards, posts saying that MNSN is not suportive. That some faces don't fit. That it's not all it's cracked up to be.

Fine. I get that not everybody is the same, and may not want the same things form this board as me, or other posters. But it isn't really said here, and so we don't reallt get right of reply.

It's a bit like talking about us behind our backs.

I know there have ben disagreements and differences over the years. I have been part of some of them, but on the whole I thought we muddled through quite well - expcially given that we are all under a reasonable amount of stress most of the time, and that we all face fairly different challenges on a daily basis.

So - what do people want form MNSN? Is there anything we (as a community) can do to welcome people who feel left out? Anythign we can do to help posters who lurk rather than post?

I am rather hoping htis might be a moving forward discussion, rather than a re-hash of any he said/she said grievances. BUt as I said earlier, maybe this is entirely misguided. Sorry if it is.

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HelenMumsnet · 07/03/2013 13:04

@lougle

I've just come back to this and I'm absolutely baffled as to why my post has been deleted. I don't see that calling a passive-aggressive post a passive-aggressive post is breaking the talk guidelines.

I have kept my cool, I have not retaliated to threads directed at me, with my name in the title.

This situation is completely destructive. Posters who claim they 'cannot post' having other posters speak on their behalf. Really?

I'm not getting the impression at all that there are discussions being had elsewhere about the SN board. No, not at all

Afternoon.

We've deleted a few posts here because they were reported to us as personal attacks - and we thought they were.

We have also had other posts from this thread reported to us as personal attacks, which we haven't deleted because we didn't read them that way at all.

As we see it, and in line with our Guidelines, it's completely fine to express a criticism of MNSN, either in general or more specifically about the kinds of posts that tend to be posted, but it's not fine to attack another poster personally.

So, "I think the way MNHQ come onto threads and post is very annoying and intrusive and I wish they didn't do it" is fine - if not very nice.

But, "I think HelenMumsnet is very annoying and she's always getting on people's nerves by jumping into threads without warning" would be a personal attack and a breaking of the Guidelines.

On a more general note, it's lovely to read so many testimonies her about how MNSN has been such a help/lifeline to so many. Hurrah!

We can also see that, at times, some have not found it helpful.

We think, as many of you have pointed out, this is what can happen on a board that's been running for a while.

A poster at the very beginning of her SN journey may come across others who are a long way further down the road. Most of time, the discussion is wonderfully warm and supportive and helpful. On the odd occasion, the (understandable) fragility/maybe even partial denial of the new-journeyer can rub up against the been-there-and-done-it practicality of the older-timer - and feelings can be (usually completely unintentionally) hurt.

This is kinda the nature of discussion forums - there will always be posts you may not agree with - but, in our experience, it is mercifully rare in MNSN. And that's all down to you folks being such lovely people to talk to, even when you're all at your absolute tether end.

That said, there will, inevitably and very sadly, always be one or two posters who don't/can't find what they're looking for here in the way of advice, understanding and support.

That's not their fault or the fault of other folks who post here; it's probably down to the unique difficulties of their own circumstances - which could make it hard for others to relate to and help with.

Of course, that's a terrible shame. We'd like to think everyone could find support and answers here. But we don't think there's anything to be gained by getting cross with others for not being able to help or, indeed, getting cross with those who are getting cross, iyswim.