IndigoBell support thread

[betterwhenthesunshines]

I see from another member that Indigo Bell has been banned from MN. I would just like to say that it was her advice that led me to look into help for my DD. Without that I truly believe she would not have made the advances she has.

Indigo's views mat not have been proven scientifically, but she certainly helped open many people's eyes to alternative ways of helping their children. People could choose to listen or ignore as they wished. She always took time to help people who were stuck and frustrated. I miss her and MN is a poorer place without her.

AT the top of this page Our SN area is not a substitute for expert advice. While many Mumsnetters have a specialist knowledge of special needs, if they post here they are posting as members, not experts.
So I propose that MN reconsiders. Please.

Hmm MN I remain unconvinced that you couldn't have replied saying as pagwatch said. It does indeed sound like a stand-off and really, you are being disengenuous throwing your hands up in innocence saying "but we just did what she wanted us to do".

I also can't understand why posters on other boards really would complain about her - as I said before, and like others I haven't always agreed with her recommendations, but unless her posting style was really different to how it is on this boards, can't see how she could really cause offence to this extent and perhaps some of those posters might benefit from looking at this board

Anyway - ellen and star and coff33 and anyone else who is taking a week off in protest. Please reconsider. It won't help anyone, and you three are among the most helpful, informative and supportive posters here - it would be a shame if your help was missed by someone who could really benefit from it. And also a massive shame if any of you missed out on the help you might really need atm

Wow, just wow.

MNHQ - can you honestly not see how insulted and upset Indigo must have felt on reading your message? She's the Mum of 3 SN kids and as such takes enough knocks in RL without being the recipient of a missive like that.

This could happen to any one of us over on the main forums if we challenge standard "caring carrot" thinking in a misguided attempt to help others. It's really important we all take note of MNHQ's views on this issue.

I'm also "signing in" to back Indigo up.

Well, I have no idea who would want to report her replies, but if they were so offended, then maybe they could of just averted their eyes. I really hope the people who pressed that report button have never taken advice off Indigo.

Please reconsider leaving Indigo

I feel so sad that Indigo felt so backed into a corner that she had to be asked to be banned.

Every board has its 'experts' surely. In the fact not that they are trained or professionals, but because they have experience, and they are sharing it with others in a helpful 'I-have-been-there' way.

Without that MN would be a bit of a shite place wouldnt it?

If anyone is in touch with Indigo, can you send her our love.

That's so true Vaga. Without the people who've "been there and done that" there would be no one to tell 'their' experiences. Makes no sense

I support Indigo here, and really feel sad at this whole situation. I personally dont support the TH programme, however i do believe that it can help a lot of parents, and i also know a lot of parents on here are so grateful and want advice that Indigo has to offer. Indigo should be able to express her opinions, and is always happy & willing to do so. Indigo is after all only giving advice based on her personal experiences. I feel really sad that very helpful & supportive members Star, Coff33, Badvoc, Maria, and others are taking a week off MN, it will be really awful when someone comes along looking for advice which these mums are usually able to offer.

I have only just got on here so to hear she's banned, she has been a great support to so many and wasn't claiming to be an expert but expressing her opinion. MNHQ told her she couldn't express these anymore and to them that she wont stop and you would have to ban her to stop her, and you did. She didn't ask you to ban her!!

We are not experts but you will find loads of posters here are further along than others and it's those posters that people reply on for advice that works and words of support.
I don't think I have her on fb, but please send her my thoughts x

Does anyone know where this started? Was there a specific thread or something? I'm a bit baffled...

I didn't always agree with Indigo and thought sometimes her tone was a tad evangelical, but recognized that it had come from the absolutely cast iron results she had experienced and wanted to share. Irrefutable.

I've no idea why anyone would report and complain, tbh.

I am lolling a levels bit at the 'expert' thang. It might not be pretty, but we really are all experts on our own children on this board. That's why we share our expert experiences when we find something that works and might help someone else. The 'real' experts are no such thing.

Does anyone at mnhq have a child with sn? (I don't even really particularly want to know, but am curious - the 'expert' thing is so very different where sn is concerned. Our consultant paed wrote me a lovely letter explaining what cerebral palsy was and muffed it up so badly that I rang scope in horror. They were unsurprised, and this stuff is freely available, not exactly seven years of medical training worthy. Expert my arse.)

We are all experts. In our own kids. That are slightly different from the norm and each other, so any help or ideas we can get are a bonus, surely?

I seem to have missed a build up though - but I haven't been on the TH thread, though I've signposted a couple of people to it. Was it trolled?

Try contrasting it to relationships board...

I do wonder if MNHQ tells posters to tone down their replies when they tell the OP's to leave the bastard for something trivial. Now I know that the posters are simply posting using their own experiences as the basis of their advice, so how does that compare with what happened to Indigo?

think it was a thread in primary ed, madwoman (not seen you about lately - how's things?)

indigo spent a lot of time helping people there, probably in the hope that that she could help them avoid the fobbing off she had with her dc.

I hope IndigoBell does read the enormous number of posts supporting her here.
I never got the impression that she was blaming any parent for the dyslexia of their child, or that she was putting herself in the role of expert. As has already been said in this thread, we are not children and their are disclaimers to the effect that this is peer support and shared experiences rather than anything else more dubious.
So I hope you do contact MNHQ and say that you want unbanning, there are a lot of peole who have listened and tried out some of your suggestions and benefited.
This is a big, inclusive community and there is a lot of room and acceptance of a range of approaches, it would be horrible to think that the many theories and strategies come into conflict and the SN boards collapse from within.

not too bad, thanks, how's that baby? - ds1's continence issues are improving slowly. but he's been seeing psych and outreach a few times a month.still tinkering with diet, but slowly! Supplements and low carb, but not gf/cf at the mo.

Ah, primary. Don't hang out there too often. Took mn hol over the summer, but cruising around a bit now. there seems to have been a few rumblings that I was unaware of... I should know better.

Honk for indigo

And rude wet bottom noise for the 'experts'. Pah.

baby is great, thanks - up to elbows in poo again though . nearly had to stay extra time in hospital when he was born, as couldn't tell if he was weeing ok - every nappy was a pooey one! (and that has continued - I have yet to change a non-pooey nappy, 8 weeks on)

yay for ds1's issues slowly improving - great news.

Story of your life

yep

think he's letting me know early on that we're in it for the long haul

but hey, need something to keep me occupied

How's dh? all good/ improved?

much improved. work in progress on both sides, but better on the whole.

So pleased. Life is such a rollercoaster - glad you are on the up x

Total rollercoaster. sorry for abbrev posts - ds en route to next gooey nappy , and can't hold him easily with one arm anymore as he is a chubster...

Grr, pooey. Dyac.

Think the analogy with the strident posters on a board like relationships is a good one. Any number of posters come down like tonnes of bricks on others for staying or leaving or snooping or not snooping based on their experience so struggling to understand why sn parental expertise is singled out. Never heard indigo claim to be other than informed parent.