And the B***a*ds strike again :(

[coff33pot]

I dont know how much more of this I can bloody take.

And so ds been learning about mining and has developed a big interest in it. I take books to school, research with ds about his ancestors on the net who were miners, where they mined and which mining community they lived in and printed it off so he had a deeper involvment and help him fit in. DS loves rocks and digging at the best of times.

Letter April school trip to mines, going to get a chance to go underground, smash a few rocks for tin and a workshop. DS is so excited about it.

Yesterday he walks in and gives in the form and pays the money with me. This morning he was telling me all about it and giving me a run down in the car about what packed lunch he wanted to take etc and we cant be late mum he says.

They decided TODAY that they wont take him. They left it until 3.15 today to tell my boy that he cant go on his school trip. He walked out so sad refusing to cry. He cant understand why said he doesnt have a reason and all his friends are going.

I want to fucking kill the woman.

Am so glad you had a wonderful day with your DS! You all sound amazing and you will get through this. This school needs a major kick up the backside, it is disgraceful the way they are treating you and DS. Keep strong, know it is easier said then done.

F*ers.

I'm not often this close to speechlessness.

Thanks for that link Agnes

It's a steady whittling away now day by day.

DS would have remained written off without home tuition and the Learning & Skills Council funding which no longer exists.

So the upshot is that Academies can refuse to admit.

So much for inclusiveness.

This Govt needs a major kick up the arse.

I propose an official "name & shame SEN" public board so that over time users of Mumsnet can see which LEA's and schools build up the worst reps.

Suggested rules below are for easy searching.

All thread titles to follow set format:-

LEA NAME:- SCHOOL NAME,
One post per school per term per poster.
All users to search for an existing thread to add to before starting a new thread.
Must mention disability in post as to be fair some schools/LEA's are pretty good in some areas of SEN and appalling in others.

In a year or so some of the worst offenders are likely to crop up often enough to be a useable red flag to SEN parents, (or journos!). The aim being that the parents of the next kid with the same disability as coff's child will know to avoid this school like the plague.

To stop NT parents just winging, posters could perhaps pop a draft on this board first to gain consenus on whether a school is "worthy" of our virtual hall of shame?

Can we ask MNHQ?

Good Suggesion but Difficult Issue

I agree they should be named and shamed BUT

we all know that the LA snoopers inhabit this board and they do exact revenge.

So a parent wouldn't feel comfortable naming and shaming until their child had left the school at which point they'd probably be still within the same LA.

Also need to consider defamation - if that applies to schools, it would apply to staff we referred to such as SENCO.

Bit of a minefield really.

How about keeping a list that we could send to trusted posters via PM?

This sort of treatment goes unchecked as there is no mechanism to stop it. The nanny state monitors parents - NOTHING effective is in place to protect children like coffs until the damage is done in schools.

The reason that they get away with it is because parents do not complain frequently enough to the right people.

There is a natural tendency to 'not want to make a fuss' / sour realtionship with school etc.

So, excluded from a school trip - complain to DD Tribunal

Crap treatment at school - complain to HT / Govs / LA

Crap treatment by LA - complain to LGO

Crap treatment by medics - complain to PALS/PCT

Once they have to start spending time and money answering complaints they ill have a 'light bulb momment' and realise they're better off improving services so they don't get complaints in the first place.

That's why our LA built an autistic base - so they didn't have to fend off SENDIST appeals for independent AS provision.

And that's why I sued them. To cause them a tiny amount of the pain and grief they caused me.

That's how to change things - complain IN WRITING and persue the complaint to the bitter end.

But too many people just shrug off the abysmal treatment they receive.

Just seen this (sorry, mrsnamechanged here)

I just can't believe these people you are having to deal with
It is clearly discriminatory and simply calculatedly cruel

why ON EARTH would you do that to a child, to deliberately include and then pull the rug (mind you, my child was refused on the school trip bus earlier this year too!).

It is beyond horrible. It is disgusting [anger]

I am very glad you had a nice day out with Ds and I do hope the mine people can lay on a special trip

BUT

I hope you can get these complete gits re discrimination (sorry, not as articulate as others upthread, just incoherant with anger).

I'd love them all to be in Ds (and your) shoes for a day to see how it FELT.

Coff, I am so glad that you and DS had a great day out. I am even more glad that, despite the school's obstructionist attitude, the new TA got to meet your DS and probably in a context that shows her exactly what he is like rather than the (what appears to me) very anxious person he is in school.

I hope you get to FLOUNCE into his teacher on Monday morning and ask for the money to be returned, in full and immediately, as your DS was not allowed to go on the trip. I presume there is no way they would try to hold onto it if he couldn't participate?

Best of luck and lots of strength for the next 8 weeks.

I would contact ofsted to complain as well. With ds2 they tried to ban him from nativity and school trip to see a nativity. Got inclusion officer involved and contacted ofsted. He participated in both and did amazing. Interestingly some NT children didn't participate so well .

I'm glad you treated him, poor boy. X

I agree a "name and shame" public board would be good but at the same time I envisage the poster plus MNHQ being in a whole lot of legal hot water. Not that I personally care right now if there was a personal attack on me. It cant get any worse can it.

I emailed LA advising them I am now seeking legal advice and have received a reply saying they are going to contact the school about the trip situation.

Spoke to MG who are emailing me with fees. I can at least send off reports,notes,emails etc I have and receive constructive advice on what to do next for £350.

By the sounds of it I can go down judicail review route in DS name to at least make sure his statement is upheld at the Juniors by the LA. But its so short a time left at the infants to have any impact on them there.

The other option is that they are and have been discrimatory and I would have to take the school on. But I would have to fight in my name.

I am not going to afford this am I :(

You don't have to take on the world, coff33. I know we'd all like you to but you do have to look after yourself and your DS first. Pick your battles. We are all so angry and upset on your DS's behalf that we want this piece of shit HT to be punished, but it's not our fight.

Coff, if you really feel you can't leave the issue, fighting yourself without legal support might not give you the satisfaction of a win, but it will give you the satisfaction of tying up the incompetents in paperwork for near on a year!

That might be enough to make them think again next time.

Btw, are you aware of this:

www.mumsnet.com/Talk/special_needs_support_sessions/1479112-Mumsnet-KIDS-support-session-on-special-needs-and-education-THIS-THURSDAY-9pm

Your day out sounds absolutely fabulous. Your DS will always remember that you put him first, however horrible the school have been. Glad too that he's met his new TA and that she seems nice.

Good luck with your fight - we are all behind you.

I have had some good news today. The mines phoned me and said to take ds in during half term as they are going to have skilled masons and miners in during that week. They are opening the drilling for the kids to have a go with the masons on drilling for tin. He will get an underground tour because that is open to public with a guide and he will get to go panning for gems. Also they cant do the educational talk, there are videos but that would be difficult for him to sit through with loads of people, but instead when I take him he will meet one of the original miners that went down that mine and he can ask for as many stories as he likes :)

It is a shame that its not closer as there would be only one more week of mining then its half term and they will choose another subject. But at least he gets the experience just like the others. I think what I will do is help him to make a scrap book to take for show and tell to his class after half term it might boost his confidence a bit if he can say he went too.

I emailed M Gove as an add on to my email I previously sent (had no reply but they do say it could take 20 days) giving him an update on what they are continuing to do.

Feel crap that I cant afford to get a proper solicitor its like me letting ds down and saying its ok to treat kids this way. So I needed to chew someones ears off and I hope they are not deaf ones.

Off to the beach for a latte and a splash. He has had 3 good days but he is constantly panicking totally school refusing now. If he is bad next week I am keeping him home for good.

Have you tried the Children's Legal Centre, coff?

Good news about the mine.

I agree that if he can't handle it next week then keeping him home till he can be with his lovely new Juniors TA is a good idea.

Have fun at the beach x

Coff33 you are absolutely not letting your ds down, you know that don't you? You are an amazing mum, you are doing everything in your power and then some to stand up for and support your ds. Money doesn't come into it - we can't all fight the legal battles - let alone win, what with all the odds stacked against us, but that is by the by. You are always there, every time, to love him unconditionally, support him whenever he needs it and fight when you have to, that is so much more than so many parent ever do for their children - your dcs are so lucky to have you for their mum.

Have a great afternoon at the beach and a lovely sunny weekend - everything else can keep. ((more hugs))

Just a thought that if you are thinking of taking the school on on a discrimination issue then there might be charities associated with your ds's dx who might help. Also don't forget your local press!

Coff, the lengths you have gone to already........

It's hard, because it is like fight to the death and all your child gets at the end is a better chance of adequate, but please for one time only, don't measure the quality of provision by outcome.

Does that KIDS charity not do free representation at tribunal? I though I saw that on their info?
Its a tribunal not a court case for discrimination isn't it? I though it went to SENDIST so is free
I might be wrong - let us know what MG Say.

Thanks guys good time at beach strawberries and latte and ds soaking the majority of holiday makers with his water pistol lol

I guess it was a feel sorry for myself day. Which is wrong there are so many of us that cant do the fighting I guess I am just angry at the system like everyone else is.

Yes star it would be "adequate" but tbh I would settle for that if he was having it now. :)

Its admission I want. That they failed him and someone to say sorry in a letter that I can show my son that none of this is his fault. That adults can get it wrong too and apologise for it. Also some Judge to tell them to get their act together for future SN needs and stop the discrimination.

MG emailed me but not discussing fees only that I can send all docs and emails to them and pay them £420 for the service of providing me a written analysis of my claim and discuss which available avenues I can take regards to school and LA. Also listing of fees comes with that.

What she said on phone was if I go down a Judicial Review route, due to the short period ds has left there the only possible outcome that they could do is that the LA and his next school upholds his statement. DS would have legal aid in his name for that. I dont want to upset the Junior school as they are working at doing everything possible and booking training sessions and he isnt even there.

Or from the discrimatory side I would have to go against the school but that would be in my name. The sol did say they have gone about things totally the wrong way regarding the trip so I think I have a chance of proving it along with the illegal exclusions.

I have tried to ring ipsea for 4 days now and not got through. I am currently looking at the Tribunal form and the right up on DD in schools on that site. Its a case of do I go it alone or not and if I am strong enough to do this.

There are no KIDS covering our area though agnes the south west stops at gloucester I think lol