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SN children

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Original poster

And the B***a*ds strike again :(

102 replies

coff33pot · 22/05/2012 17:41

I dont know how much more of this I can bloody take.

And so ds been learning about mining and has developed a big interest in it. I take books to school, research with ds about his ancestors on the net who were miners, where they mined and which mining community they lived in and printed it off so he had a deeper involvment and help him fit in. DS loves rocks and digging at the best of times.

Letter April school trip to mines, going to get a chance to go underground, smash a few rocks for tin and a workshop. DS is so excited about it.

Yesterday he walks in and gives in the form and pays the money with me. This morning he was telling me all about it and giving me a run down in the car about what packed lunch he wanted to take etc and we cant be late mum he says.

They decided TODAY that they wont take him. They left it until 3.15 today to tell my boy that he cant go on his school trip. He walked out so sad refusing to cry. He cant understand why said he doesnt have a reason and all his friends are going.

I want to fucking kill the woman.

OP posts:

BiddyPop · 23/05/2012 10:52

Oh Coff, that is dreadful. It is so cruel to allow him all the excitement, especially about something he LOVES, take his money and let him think he's going, to then pull the rug so completely (yet again) from under him. AND expect him to still GO to school but still with nowhere to run and hide when he needs to. :(

I haven't been reading everything going on, but have seen a fair bit of the absolute rotten treatment school has been giving you. Hugs to you and DS. Sorry I haven't anything practical to offer. :(

moosemama · 23/05/2012 11:16

Late to the thread, but wanted to come and express my shock, dismay and sheer bloody [anger] at the way that school continues to treat your ds. I wish I could come down there and give that HT a blooming good shake. How can she not see the child in all of this and what she's doing to him. Bad enough to not include him in the trip, but to get him all excited about it and then tell him he can't go just smacks of spite imo. How can anybody, let alone someone who has chosen a career working with children, treat a little boy so appallingly?

I really hope you can force them to let him go - you shouldn't have to fight like this though.

It's such a shame you live so far away, as if it were closer, I'm sure we could arrange a group trip to the place, that loads of our dcs would love.

((hugs)) to you and your ds.

LadySybilDeChocolate · 23/05/2012 11:18

How's your lovely boy is? Ds has a lot of fossils and gems and he was wondering if your son would like some?

LadySybilDeChocolate · 23/05/2012 11:18

Doh! I can write. How's your lovely boy?

bochead · 23/05/2012 12:16

Can we all do an email petition to the Governors of this school protesting this child's treatment?

I thought last year my own son's treatment was a one-off but these stories are becoming too common & it's really doing my head in to think that people can get away with treating small children so appallingly. Knowing this goes on yet just sitting at a keyboard sympathising with the OP time, after time, after time isn't good enough anymore for me. I need it to stop.

Schools like this need to be named & shamed.

Original poster

coff33pot · 23/05/2012 12:17

Thank you guys. I have tried ringing IPSEA but cant get through insanity.

I am still beyond angry tbh. DS had a rough night but he slept in till 10am and woke up saying "they would have gone now" There was no way he was going to school and I havent even bothered to phone them.

So mum is on a misson. I am planning to take him to a park down here this afternoon where he can feed nectar birds, otters and see a flying display, go mad in the park and then they have a big softplay and slide area so that should cheer him up:) I am quite looking forward to a DS and me time.

Have spoken to the people at the mines and they said his school is there. Told them what they have done and the woman is going to talk to her manager and ring me back. Said she could organise a guide for an underground mine tour but not sure if she can arrange the educational side that the others are doing but she is going to check and see what she can do. I said I am willing to pay as if extra people are going but will have to see. At least they are trying to help :)

LadySibil that is so so lovely of your son that brought tears to my eyes. What a lovely boy you have :)

OP posts:

LadySybilDeChocolate · 23/05/2012 12:24

Your poor son, coff. I'm happy to put them in the post for you. Is there another school you can move him to, they sound really horrible and I wouldn't be able to forgive them for doing this.

insanityscratching · 23/05/2012 12:31

Co33 do you want me to pm you head of SOSSEN's email addy? I'm sure she'd be happy to advise or phone Maxwell Gillott helpline perhaps.I'd just call their bluff anyway and say IPSEA have advised they aren't going to question anyway as they'll be shit scared about disability discrimination

bochead · 23/05/2012 13:16

Can you ring the LA and DEMAND they provide a home tutor till the end of term for DS? I know you have to work so can't HE but can't help wondering if hitting em in the wallet might be the only way to make it stop.

EllenJaneisnotmyname · 23/05/2012 14:14

I hope you are having a lovely day with your DS, coff33pot. It's really too sunny and nice to be down a mine today. I really hope the mine management can help you. So glad you only have 1/2 a term to go, wish it was 1/2 a day. I thought it was bad when my DS's playgroup didn't want him to come to the Christmas party when he was 3 'because what would he get out of it?' But your school takes the

zzzzz · 23/05/2012 14:17

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

alison222 · 23/05/2012 14:36

I have just seen this and am . Although given all your previous problems I feel that perhaps I shouldn't be to surprised at this completely awful treatment.
The person you spoke to at the mine sounds good and I hope that they can do something great for your DS.

I think that the advice to go via IPSEA or others to the LEA re discrimination sounds good.

BentFinger · 23/05/2012 15:45

I am absolutely appalled at the behaviour of the school! Your poor poor boy :(

I could actually cry for him....

robotcornysilk · 23/05/2012 16:21

OMG this is absolutely appalling - how fucking dare they? And they have told him that it's because he won't be safe, so are basically telling him that it's his fault.

ouryve · 23/05/2012 16:36

Oh, Coff33, what a cruel thing for them to do to your DS.

Original poster

coff33pot · 23/05/2012 19:15

Well we are back and DS and I have had the most amazing day. We fed nectar birds, he was chosen to feed the penguins, fed baby goats and had a packed lunch watching a free flying bird show, had a train ride and went in the pirate play park where I was a deckhand and he was captain "DS" sailing away to Australia looking for Kukaburras He then had a mad dash round the indoor softplay for an hour and bought himself and his sister talking monkeys.

Uncannily enough I bumped into DS new TA appointed for the Juniors with her little girl. I was only quickly introduced a couple months ago and she is lovely. She remembered me straight away and came over to say hello, at first DS gave her a shifty look but when I explained who she was when she had gone he hunted her down to say hello :) She was horrified at what the school had done as DS blurted it out and told him she couldnt wait to see him again and she guaranteed they will have loads of fun together. Actually she said they were going to have a BALL and DS frowned and said what do you mean I have one of those We bumped into them at the softplay too and she had time for DS when he was in there. He left yelling and waving saying "see you at Juniors"!

She said apparently she has been constantly trying to meet DS in the infants and they have still refused to arrange it so I am glad she got to meet him outside of the gates and saw who he really is.

All in all the day couldnt have gone better. Mines havent phoned me back but to be honest if they were having tours then they would be busy so I will ring tomorrow.

OP posts:

MamaMaiasaura · 23/05/2012 19:24

Is there an inclusion officer you can contact?

moosemama · 23/05/2012 19:32

I am so glad your ds had a really good day and what a bonus getting to meet his new TA as well. Hopefully he can start looking forward to his new school now and his current hell hole will soon be nothing more than a bad memory.

Are you keeping him off for the rest of the week so that he doesn't have to endure all the after trip talk/work?

Desperatelyseekingsupport · 23/05/2012 19:34

Glad you had a good day with ds. again at school for not letting new TA get to know him. I would seriously complain to Ofsted if I were you - there's an online form you can use. You must be so glad he's getting out of there.

Original poster

coff33pot · 23/05/2012 20:13

No hes not going back this week. He is staying home with me and if something comes of this mining trip tomorrow or Friday I will take him there too.

If they have done this as a punishment then its backfired as I am not sending him for him to have to listen to all the fun stuff and look at the gems they found during panning for them.

I am now emailing the LA as I have a review meeting in a couple weeks at this school with them again and after the last one and the exclusion with governors and now this they can go to hell if I am going to any more meetings. I am going to get hold of MG Solicitors tomorrow morning and see what they say. Today I just wanted to get out the house and have some fun with ds. Dont know if I can afford it but I got to give this a go.

OP posts:

ommmward · 23/05/2012 20:23

I'm so glad you had a good day, and completely steaming about the school. Horrible, horrible people. I bet they have really nicey nicey fake sing song voices and false smiles.

NoHaudinMaWheest · 23/05/2012 20:37

Never used those before but got DS to show me how because nothing else seemed adequate. Ds's message is to kill the HT but I don't recommend that (after all your Ds needs you to be not in prison!). Dd's recommendation is to sue HT. I hope you can do something along those lines. So glad you had a good day today.
P.S. Ds is very concerned that you know he was not serious about the killing. (Aspie literalness!)

moosemama · 23/05/2012 20:57

Keeping everything crossed you can do the mining thing with him as well this week Coff, that way he's had more fun than the rest of his class. It won't make it right, but at least your ds won't miss out.

I really am at a loss to express how angry I am on you and your ds's behalf. Torn between shaking in anger and wanting to cry for your boy.

Good luck with the solicitors, I really hope they can help you stick it to that bloody HT!

marchduck · 23/05/2012 21:36

Coff, just so sorry to read about this, so unfair on your DS.

It is my understanding that schools need to risk assess trips like this in advance of offering them. I can't understand how the school, which is aware of your DS's needs, made a decision on the suitability of this trip for the class, but only afterwards, claim to have come to the conclusion that the trip would involve health & safety issues which bar your DS. Surely the school, being aware of your DS's needs, should have picked an inclusive outing, or put in place arrangements which would have enabled your DS to attend like everyone else.

I'm sure someone else has probably suggested it up-thread, but I would ask HT, under FOI request, for all information about how the school decided on this trip, and the rationale for subsequently excluding DS.

AgnesDiPesto · 23/05/2012 21:41

Bochead

Can we all do an email petition to the Governors of this school protesting this child's treatment? I thought last year my own son's treatment was a one-off but these stories are becoming too common & it's really doing my head in to think that people can get away with treating small children so appallingly. Knowing this goes on yet just sitting at a keyboard sympathising with the OP time, after time, after time isn't good enough anymore for me. I need it to stop.Schools like this need to be named & shamed.

This is how I feel too. Have heard 4 awful stories this week - cof, claw and 2 in RL I can't talk about but even worse.

Am beginning to feel scared that all the safeguards are going to be unravelled as the 'big State is bad' and "HT given more control" just means HT can behave badly knowing no-one can stop them. And SEN Next Steps just means LAs axing as many children off statements as they can because they don't want them stuck on their watch until 25.

Am more than up for a campaign. Would happily sign a petition. Or send a piece of coal! We could do a reverse 'balloon race' and see who can send a piece of coal from the most far-flung corner of the world .

Saw this today on IPSEA Facebook page - Government removed minimum school attendance rules without any warning so now cannot even argue for a minimum number of home tutor hours.

Its getting brutal out there.

Really pleased your DS had a good day Cof - and the weather is set to last a few days. Soak up the sun!

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