My Coff33cup has had his dx

[coff33pot]

Well we are now either at the end or the beginning at the moment I dont know where I am.

My lovely boy has received his dx's
DS has Aspergers, ADHD, Upper body motor and vocal tics (Tourettes), Sensory Processing Disorder and Social Communication Disorder. What a platefull. He also has issues with writing and reading that they are concerned about.

They have measured his head, height and weight and he has to have a blood test down here to be transported to Maudsley for testing to see if there are any underlying causes, genetic wise, medical wise or illness wise that could be an underlying cause for this basketfull.

They have said that because he is young, with the right help and thorough support and understanding he could well avoid the necessity of meds but they will review as things go.

How are you feeling Coff33?

Wow! That is an awful lot to process for you; as parents, your family and your lovely boy.
I suppose now you've got the Dx. What is next?

Wow Coff! No wonder the poor thing has been struggling with that lot. Well done you for following through to get such a full list of dx for him.

Are you still in London? Take time for yourself when you get home. Have a walk by the beach. Sit and have a coffee. Whatever you need.

xx

Bloody Hell Coffee! I want to come and find you and give you a hug.

What an awful lot for you to process, although there appears to be no reason why prognosis can't be good (well except for the usual crap of getting the 'right' support etc.)

I don't think many understand what it takes and quite what you have to put yourself through as a parent to get to where you have. You must feel like you've been through the wars.

Whatever emotions you have to go through over the next few months make sure at least one of them is pride at what you have done for your DS. He is incredibly lucky to have a parent prepared to go to such lengths.

Wow Coff, that really is a plateful. All what I can say is well done for getting this far. From what I have read about the sacrifices you have made to get where you are, your DS is very lucky to have you. And good luck for the future.

Gosh Coff33, that's such a lot for you to take in.

It just goes to reinforce what a fantastic mum you are though, not only for loving and being there for him unconditionally and never expecting him to be anybody other than who he is etc, but also for not giving up the fight that has led you (and him) to this point.

His prognois is good, because he has you and you will make sure he gets whatever he needs to be the best he can be.

You've been here long enough to know to allow yourself time to process this and space to feel whatever you need to feel, but remember we are all here to support you when/if you need it as well.

((hugs))

((hugs)) No words really going through this with ny 5 year old atm (3rd child with SEN issues ect)

Wow coff, what can i say. Well done you for following it through. I think this is a new beginning for you and your family.

Be kind to yourselves and try to take some time out to absorb all that info.

I am sure you ds will be ok because he has a great mum who is going to keep on doing what she does.

Good luck and have a ((hug))..

Hi coff33. All I can say is that he's lucky that he's actually a very lovely little boy and beautiful too, despite his list of DXs. But you've always known that. ((((hugs)))) xx

Hi, Coff33pot. This is definitely the beginning. That's quite a shopping list, but you definitely now have a much better idea of what your son needs.

But it is the end of begging people to listen to you, to believe you or to take you seriously.

Thank goodness your ds has such a fantastic mum x

Oh coffee. It sounds like a lot, but they're all overlapping issues iykwim. He always sounds so sweet in your descriptions, from which I deduce 1. He's lovely 2. You love him very much.
(((hugs)))

Just (((hugs))) for you at the moment. He is still your amazing boy and hopefully this dx will lead to getting him access to the help he needs to make his life fulfilling and less difficult.

Be kind to yourself at the moment, it is a lot to take in. Write down any questions you want to ask, just in case you forget for any further meetings too.

I hope his dx has helped you understand his behaviours especially if you've struggled to get his dx. I hope they can now give you the support you need without any further angst.

Well done Coff33. This is both an end and a beginning. The end of uncertainty in one sense and the beginning of a different life, but not with a different boy. He sounds lovely when you talk about him and he is still just as lovely.

As the others have said, allow yourself time to adjust.... as long as you need. Sending hugs.

Coff Hugs. As others have said well done for your determination which got you and ds this far. Even though you have suspected some of it for a long time it is going to take a while to process so be kind to yourself and relax for a while if you can.

coff33 just wanted to add my best wishes for you and your ds.

Thank you all so much for posting. Had I gone up and my son had a magic pill and no dx I would never leave this board. I just wish you all lived down here with your beautiful children. If it wasnt for all of you I would have gone bonkers (well more than usual)

Tiredness is playing a huge part I think as I suddenly feel I havent slept for months. I lost it completely today. My poor mum was in tears and my DH was dumbstruck. I didnt go for them I was yelling at the system and the blame. I dont know where it come from but I went berserk. Over the last year I have had child protection visit thanks to school thinking that DS behaviour was down to something going on at home. After they saw me and saw its not possible they interogated my DH who is the last person in the world who would hurt a fly. Camhs saying I couldnt love my son because you cant bond with a child who didnt open his eyes for 6 weeks and so that is the cause. I was told pmt and pnd play a role here. I was told I was too soft. I was told I was too hard. I was told we worked to much and so he was deprived of love as a baby. I got to admit these mind games have nearly broke me and stupid as it sounds I was beginning to believe it was us even though I have two other children without ds issues.

There is such a huge difference between a proffessional psychiatrist down here telling you a few social stories and a hair cut will do him wonders to suddenly this huge list and I am so angry that 14 months have been wasted not believing and persecuting my family I want to rip someones heart out and squeeze it like they have mine.

I have to get my head round this before they start school again. I have an appt with the camhs down here and god help me if I flip. One thing I can do now is go to the GP who believed in me and give him the biggest box of choc biscuits I can find and finally get some anti depressents because I have been to scared to get them incase they added that to the list of my faults.

DS and I just finished making a cake. It is him I am proud of he said his body feels like he wants to cry inside. He has had the toughest day yesterday and they put him through so much on his own, and that is how he described it but he has not had one meltdown today and I think today I had one for him. :)

Coff33. God bless you. Your post has made me cry. You are a woman in a million.

coff33pot - you are always one of the first on posting to me and my rants, helping, advising and giving the best support!.

your son is so lucky to have such a determined and informed mum to get this far! You are certainly entitled to have the odd meltdown today of all days.

Just wanted to give you a big hug and wish you and DS all the best. x