How about a passive fighting strategy, rather than an active fighting one?
You don't need to challenge, demand etc. and hope for change and improvements with all the let down and emotional stress that causes. Instead just assume that nothing will change and record this happening in detail for the day, when you are in a better position to actively fight again.
Think about a time, in a year, in 3 years, in 5 years, when a true opportunity comes up to radically change things, and think about what the future you might wish you had recorded of the times leading up to it.
Can you send the EP a letter stating that the current IEP doesn't look very SMART to you but the school had assured you that the EP had agreed that it was and ask her to confirm this. You are not actively demanding anything. She might not even respond and you must have no expectations that there will be any outcome. It is just a document you have created to record the issue raised, and you can put it on file. It MAY have the effect of making her more accountable and careful for the next IEP, or involving you more, but have no more expectations.
Similarly with the CAHMs thing. Each episode write to them, informing them of it. Don't expect or hope them to act. You are just passively documenting. It can be just FYI in the subject.
Attend no more meetings after today. INform them in writing that you find them too unfocussed, directionless and outcomeless and you preferred method of communication is the written form as you feel better able to express yourself that way and it is more efficient as you can all get straight to the point. This is important as the LA are 'supposed' to communicate with you according to your needs, culture, language, preferences etc. so you are within your rights to do this.
When you write something, just do it factually in a FYI type way and try hard not to put emotion behind it. Don't expect or hope for any immediate outcome from your documents.
In the future, if you ever have the health, resource, backing, support to do so you can put in one hell of an active fight using your stack of evidence of failure after failure and properly documented unaddressed needs, plus details of professional incompetence. You may at that point be in an excellent position for leverage.
Keeping these documents and filing them will give you a sense of control over your situation and stop you from spiraling into a pit of despair that will do neither you or your family any good.