AIBU to wish that parents of NT children came over and looked at this board sometimes?

[cansu]

I know that I probably am being unreasonable but ... I sometimes go on the main education boards and am amazed at what other parents are concerned, annoyed and stressing about. I have just read a thread about someone who is upset that their daughter has been 'waitlisted' for an independent girls prep school'. I know it's all relative and everyone wants the best for their kids etc but just wish people would take a look over here so they put their own situation into perspective. But then again, maybe I would have been similarly oblivious if my own dc were not ASD? I also think that the lack of concern felt by many about the cuts to disability benefits are also part of this 'it's nothing to do with us' mentality.

Yes except that people happening upon the Sn area and posting things about how disgusted they are that our 4 year olds are still in nappies or don't eat veg etc is why it was locked in the first palce (locked as in opt in)

If you have the actually-interested lot you flag it up to the bashers.

I know what you mean.

I sometimes think MN should have an SN/SEN day and showcase some of the more horrendous/funny/happy/sad stories I have read on here.

I think it would also educate and illuminate certain members of MN who think DLA/IPA is "given away" willy nilly and that if your dc has sn/sen that they will automatically get help

MIL "Theres so much help out there for sen now, isnt there?"

Me: "Is there?"

Those that are interested come here, like SGM. I'd rather take our debates and attitudes out onto the main boards than have gawpers mockers and pityfests here.

Oh, I dunno. Half of us have nt kids as well as sn ( well a third nt and two thirds sn here lol) and my nt concerns have feck all to with my sn concerns. Tis a whole other ball game. Each board has a different set of trials and tribulations, but all kids need different things. If my nt kid wasn't getting what she needed, I'd be pissed off and probably start a thread about it. It'd be v different to the threads for the other two, but no less valid. And if she needed a prep place and was wait listed, that'd irk me...

It's like the perennial g&t debate. Just because a child is bright doesn't mean that they lose the right to be stimulated and challenged and reach their own potential. And if it's not happening, you have every right to be pissed on your child's behalf. It doesn't matter if the teacher is spending all her time sorting out sn kids at the other end of the spectrum. Every child matters and all that jazz...

I haven't read the thread in question though, I reserve judgement in this particular case!!

I agree about you worry about all your kids; don't actually have an NT one (ds1 ASD, ds2 being looked at for ADD, ds3 severe asd, ds4 beinga ssessed for ASD...) but within the very wide range- ds2 for example is pretty independent and can play out- it's all the same.

Am not suggesting at all that people shouldn't worry about their NT children. I just think that having a broader view of parenting is a good thing. I know that having this view has helped me be a better teacher.

Oh I agree- and I think it's crucial really, the years I spent working with disabled people have been hugely important in dealing with our complex family, at Uni the people with the best grades and widest understanding are the parents; the otehrs tend to know their field whereas we have the widest grasp iyswim. And we are encouraged to share for that reason.

I have to admit the 'waitlisted' thread made me raise my eyebrows but would reading the 'coping with childhood cancer' thread make you stop worrying if your child with ASD wasn't coping at school? Granted, it might make you realise what you had to be grateful for (for a few moments) but then it would be back to worrying right?

Some of them do - me, for example (though I do have a much younger brother with SN). I don't say much, I don't feel qualified to. But I do take it all in and I have learnt a massive amount from the SN boards.

In fact seeing as I'm here - how do the posters on the SN board feel about parents of NT children contributing? I don't want to put my foot in it or sound patronising so I tend not to post, but then that I guess that adds to the impression that we are not reading/interested in SN threads.

I come here a lot, but normally wouldn't dream of posting as I wouldn't feel like I could add any advice, or any constructive comments iykwim. I do find it really informative, and I think I have learned a HUGE amount by reading your posts.. I hope that doesn't sound voyeuristic or selfish.

I think it depends on so many variables it is hard to formulate an answer.
I've never minded answering questions or responding to people, interpreting things sometimes. I deal with children with sn and nt children every day, and their parents.
I despise being patronised and told how I must feel, or that I must be a special person to cope with my special little boy.
Or to have him treated as a freakshow. That's when I lose the plot a little.

Barbarian I do read posts about stuff I have no experience of like coping with childhood cancer. I don't post unless I have something to offer but it does give me a bit of insight and understanding and yes gives me perspective on ds and dd's issues. I think that even though you then go back to worrying about your own kids issues, you have at least stepped out of your own world and dipped your toe into the 'what if' of other people's day to day.

I think that there are some that we wouldn't want on here, TBH.

I like it here because we don't judge each other we just try to support each other, even if it just means saying hi or something if we don't know about a particualr issue.

If this board ever got as judgy as some of the others it would empty out PDQ.

I often pop over to read, but I rarely comment on the SN threads because I don't feel qualified to - my DS is "only" severely dyslexic so I sometimes feel like I straddle both sides - I have to acknowledge that in the grand scheme of things he's got it good, but he really isn't haven't the standard carefree existence of the average child his age. To be honest I come here to e reminded of the goodness in humanity, and onto the primary education board to laugh at the "trials" of the "alpha-mums" and their prep school non problems!

By the way, what does NT mean?

Neurotypical.
As opposed to ND Neurologically Diverse.

Is that a reference to how the brain works? Because I suspect DS is neurologically diverse...

I have a child who is NT and it is just as important that he has the best chances in life that he can as it is to try and make sure that my other children despite their SEN needs achieve as much as they are capable of.

smallwhitecat - blimey. What bubble does she live in??

Sigh. It makes the 'hide poster' option seem like a good idea doesnt it!!

I always read the SN topic and my DC's are NT (I think!).

These threads do open my eyes to what you guys have to deal with. I don't post, I just read and hopefully learn a few things.

I am very similar to Meglet - I have NT (as far as I know) children and I don't post as I know I don't know anything of what you have to deal with. I hopefully learn a few things as well.

it's worth it then, even just because you guys use "NT" instead of "normal"(which really gets my goat)