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SN children

Here are some suggested organisations that offer expert advice on special needs.

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Original poster

Oppositional Defiance Disorder

34 replies

nutcracker · 05/01/2006 20:15

I would be extrmemly grateful if anyone could point me in the right direction to finding out some information on this.

I have googled but alot of the sites are american or you have to pay just to read something.

TIA

OP posts:

popsycalindisguise · 05/01/2006 20:17

essbee is the lady you need

Original poster

nutcracker · 05/01/2006 20:17

Ah and she is offline at the mo isn't she ???

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popsycalindisguise · 05/01/2006 20:18

she is indeed....i know a bit....
CAT me if you want

mummytosteven · 05/01/2006 20:18

nutty - what exactly are you after? just wondering why the sites being US based are a problem?

Original poster

nutcracker · 05/01/2006 20:18

The main thing I am trying to find out is if a child can behave at school does it mean they definatly couldn't have ODD ?

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Original poster

nutcracker · 05/01/2006 20:19

\the american sites just seem to waffle alot MTS

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popsycalindisguise · 05/01/2006 20:19

IMO no it doesnt mean they couldnt have it...

Original poster

nutcracker · 05/01/2006 20:20

Thanks Popsy, that is my opinion too going by what info I have read so far.

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starlover · 05/01/2006 20:21

have you seen this site

starlover · 05/01/2006 20:21

Characterised by negative, hostile and defiant behaviour, generally strongest in the home.

starlover · 05/01/2006 20:22

actually the one i linked to is a bit rubbish... thought there was more to it but there isn't! lol

Original poster

nutcracker · 05/01/2006 20:22

Thanks for that, it describes dd2 spot on.

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NomDePlume · 05/01/2006 20:25

NUTTY ! Sorry to gatecrash your thread but I can't get to my email, I'm on DH's laptop. Parcel Force collected the buggy at 6.15pm. The consignment number is WZ1812425, if you want to track the parcel's progress

Original poster

nutcracker · 05/01/2006 20:27

Dd fits 8 out of the 9 indicators on that site you posted Starlover.

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Original poster

nutcracker · 05/01/2006 20:27

LOL thanks NDP thats is great, have written the number down

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starlover · 05/01/2006 20:28

if you google, you should be able to make it only search uk sites... found a few others which also said the same about the fact that it can be more prominent either at home or school.
so wouldn't think the fact that she is fine at school would mean she doesn't have it.

apparently diagnosis can be pretty hard to make though!

Original poster

nutcracker · 05/01/2006 20:35

Just found quite a good site with an example on it of a girl with ODD. It explained her typical day and could quite easily have been talking about dd2.

It also said how often the behaviour needs to be occurring for you to consider ODD. Dd's behaviour probs occur probably twice the amount it suggests.

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Original poster

nutcracker · 05/01/2006 20:36

I don't think anyone would listen if i suggested it. I explained her behaviour to the psych when we last went about her OCD and she seemed to think I was the problem not dd, but dd1 doesn't behave in the same way.

It just all fits though.

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popsycalindisguise · 06/01/2006 09:50

was thinking about this last night....
why not keep a diary of her behaviour (if you haven't already) then go armed with that and the diary that you found online.....

HAve you tried all angles? Health visitor, GP, etc etc?

There is the 'contact a family' website.......someone with similar issues may be able to point you in the right direction

butty · 06/01/2006 09:51

Nutcracker,

Sorry to jump in, its just that looking at the link posted it fits chloe to a tee, although i am still battling with the peads about her having ADHD and to get a DX, maybe she has a problem more along these lines.
All i know is that something isn't right with her and it is driving everyone insane!!!

Hope you get some answers.

Butty.xxx

Original poster

nutcracker · 06/01/2006 10:22

I have decided to start a diary Popsy, because I find i get stressed when trying to explain her problems, especially as who ever I am telling usually has the knack of making me feel like I am the one going nuts.

I am also going to see if i can speak to her teacher to check her behaviour at school. Had to literally drag her in again this morning.

butty - My dd is chloe too, sounds like they have alot in common. I do remember reading a couple of your posts about your dd, and thinking that your chloes behaviour sounded like my chloe.
I just keep thinking people are just going to think I am looking for a label for her when it's just that she is naughty.

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popsycalindisguise · 06/01/2006 10:27

I would ask to speak to the teacher.....ask to go ina week or so when you have at least something in the diary. give a copy to the teacher in advance so the theacher knows what you are on about before the meeting starts.......

Explain that you know she isnt the same at school but is there anything they can do (if it were me...I would be suggesting that you continue to push with your gp for a referral and I would contact the relevant people via school - firstly then senco with a view to getting a referral via the gp to our local child and family therapy unit..this is often a way to kickstart other agencies being involved...)

You really do need to speak to Essbee......soupdragon may be able to help....

LIZS · 06/01/2006 10:33

Had a thought. How does she feel after the event, when she's calmed down. Is she remorseful or upset, could these episodes of temper and aggression actually frighten her in some way because she loses control ? Could you have a calm chat with her to see if together you can establish what the flashpoints might be and whether she "feels" it building up before she explodes. I wondered if she could learn to anticipate it in any way whether you could find a way of her telling you so you could find a safer outlet, at home perhaps going to a cushion in her room or you helping her find a quiet corner when out, thus giving her an opportunity to avoid the episodes and calm herself down. I realise it isn't always a case of just her temper, and perhaps she is too young, but it might help take the heat out of the overall situation if she learns to deal with some of it.

butty · 06/01/2006 10:35

Hi Nutcracker,

It seems a bit coincidental

I am quite involved with chloes teacher and she is really fantastic with both myself and chloe.

Chloe isn't really bad in school, they have had a few problems with her but nothing major, exept when she put toilet roll wet on the toilet doors and walls

Her main problem in school is a very poor attention span and she has to sit on the table in the class for 1 to 3 support for all her reading and writing etc...

She has recently started stealing from the school evn though both myself and her teacher pulled her for it last time when she brought me home a pair of scissors and a CD rom, even after the first warnings she has done it twice since!!!!

At home, it is like she just gets up in the morning to be naughty and cause arguments!!!!

She never listens to a word anyone says, she constantly annoys and hurts dylan and she is also physically and mentally abusive.

Last week she lost her voice because for the past 3 weeks all she has done is shout and scream at us all.

I am thinking of mentioning OCD to the silly pead when we see him again on the 3rd of Feb.

Butty.xxx

Original poster

nutcracker · 06/01/2006 10:57

Chloe so far has always been absolutly fine at school, she has no problems with the work and as far as i know and infact is on the top table for most things i think.
They always say she is quiet, popular etc and look at me like i am mad when i say we have probs at home.

At home she rules everyones lives and has done for so long now, I can't remember a time when she didn't. She can get up in the morning and in a split second the house is full of screaming and shouting just because someeone dared look at her in the wrong way, and there is no warning either, it's like someone flicks a switch.
She will pinch, bite, kick, scratch and hit dd1 and ds, and me too. Last night she stood behind me tapping me on the shoulder or pulling my jumper, for no reason other than that she knew it was annoying me.
If you try and compromise with her it's like she realises you have given in slightly and so she ups the behaviour to the point where I just want to walk out and leave her to it.

It's funny you should mention the stealing butty cos last night chloe came hime with a ball from school, and she has now hidden it so i can't make her give it back. I will find it and take it in though.

After one of her episodes, she is sometimes remorsful but mostly i would say she just forgets what she has just done and carries on with whatever she was doing. She sometimes apologises, mainly if i get upset and shut myself in my room.

I think she genuinly thinks that being good is too hard and that she can't do it.

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