Kate and William and their potential baby?

[StarlightMcKenzie]

I know this is going to sound a bit off, and I wouldn't wish a disabled child on anyone.

But given that it happens to the most normal people do you think it would help raise the profile of disabled children if one of the many children who are born with a disability, are born to them?

I'm not going to go so far as to wish/hope it because that would be awful. But I do wonder if it would make a difference.

TBH I don't think it would make much difference. In some ways it would make it worse if they used their money to pay for respite, therapies etc and made it appear that having a child with disabilities isn't that hard. It isn't as if they would have to get a non walking 3 year old and a baby on the bus to an appointment and try and entertain them while the dr is running late again while worrying that they will be late picking up their older child from school. Having a child with a disability is never easy but if you have money it helps.

Yes I tend to agree with elliej. They'd also have several nannies/carers etc to do the actual slog, the caring.

And I think it would be a braver/bolder celebrity than normal who 'comes out' so publicly. Several slebs have dc with autism and other sn and it's not in the public eye at all. Partly I guess as they want to keep their private lives (incl children) private, which is fair enough.

Also there's the danger of them being accused of using their child to get publicity for themselves - as with Jordan, which is totally unfair.

What would be great though, is if someone really high profile had a dc with sn and just takes them out and about as normal, and helps to normalise someone with sn. ie not having to campaign about it, and not hiding them away, but just saying "yes this is my child, s/he has xyz, and is as important a member of my family and society as all the others"

Actually, again, like Jordan.

But I haven't heard of half of the people on this thread, but I have heard of the Queen.

I dont think it will change anything to be honest. They have the money to get anything they want so it wouldnt affect them in the sense that they would have to fight for anything and so they would never experience the stress of the battles of the system. They could afford to go private for anything and there would be no waiting lists so the child would have the utmost advantages which I wouldnt begrudge one bit. The only link would be the private emotional turmoil any mum has and I wouldnt wish that on them for the world. We can at least express ourselves here. They wouldnt be able to because of their standing and the press leaks so I would say that whilst they had the advantages of money they would have the disadvantage of being lonely. Its not a nice thought.....

I don't think it would make that much difference. Generally people only find out about things when it affects them. There are many high profile people with children who have special needs but no one wants to play the sympathy card or use their power purely for their own agenda. I think it has to be a group effort from all parents of SN.

Nothing seperates the "haves" from the ordinary family as much as child with sen. Cameron, Prince Edward, John Travolta, the list goes on. The royal family can afford the therapies we can only dream of and they'd never be put through a social services investgation into their parenting, or the stress of a tribunal only to be swiftly followed by the chopping of hard won help at an annual review a few months later. They certainly aren't gonna be kept waiting till a child hits their teens to get a proper diagnosis. Many of the issues many of us struggle with simply aren't on their radar

The only celeb I can think off the top of my head who has tried to raise awareness in a sensible way is Jordan. sally Bercow had me wondering - who was caring for her autistic child while she was in the BB house as her hubby's career is quite demanding? None of the SEN Mums in my circle could get a potential 6 weeks respite.

Sadly I think this is a job for those in the trenches.

I know what you mean Star. You end up thinking these things because sometimes it feels like noone is ever going to listen and see what our families go through. However, famous people are often rich people, so are spared the disasterous combination of disability and poverty that so many 'real' families suffer.

I don't know, I find this thread a bit awful really.

I can see where you are coming from, but it comes across really badly.

Over the course of this last year, we have been through the agony of realising that something was wrong with ds, assessments, tests, tons of appointments, worries that ds had a degenerative disease that would mean he would not live to adulthood (these tests were clear), constant fears for his health, and the sheer hard work of carrying and caring for him. Maybe in the future I may have a different attitude, but, I would not wish any of this on anyone, whoever they may be.

Sorry, i meant to add, that despite saying that is not what you mean (ie, wishing a child with disabilities on anyone), I'm afraid that is the way it comes across, to me at least.

I think what star is getting at is that it's a shame that very few celebs use their personal knowledge to raise awareness of just how HARD life can be.

Many voted for this prime minister hoping that as the candidate with personal experience of a child with disabilities perhaps he'd understand the agony you are going through hazeyjane and try and make it so that we didn't have to deal with the huge battles for services ON TOP OF the constant caring. Often it's the poverty and the fight for services which pushes people over the edge not the disability itself.

You'd think people with the influence some of them have would try and do something to engender a little COMPASSION in the public mind towards our children. Instead if you stop work to care for your child you'll be portrayed as a lazy scrounger, no matter you are lucky if you get 3 hours kip in 24.

The combination of poverty and disability & blame is crippling for many familes and just intensifies the suffering you describe yet we have a Prime Minister who is championing a concerted media attack on the disabled recently.

I do get that, Bochead. I just think starting from the viewpoint, hmm what if William and Kate had a baby with disabilities.... just seems wrong.

If you are coming from a Tory mindset, and a priviliged background, I would think that no amount of experience of having a child with disabilities is going to change your view on benefits, tbh.

I agree with NinjaGoose - King George V and his wife Queen Mary had a child, Prince John who had epilepsy and also what would probably have been diagnosed now as autism. He died in 1919 at the age of 13 but spent his life hidden away. Very sad story.

I can't see that it made a jot of difference, he was virtually erased from history until Stephen Poliakoff wrote a play about him.

I think that one of the reasons that I dislike Cameron SO intensely is due to the fact that he used his disabled son for political purposes and has then proceeded to sh1t on the disabled and their families from a great height.

But its OK as "we're all in this together!"

bochead and Appropriatelytrained are right - A-list celebrities and the royal family live in a parallel universe compared to us common folk, with money, privilege, influence and power and the ability to buy in expertise and therapies that the rest of us can only dream of.

I can't see them being repeatedly forced to go to Tribunal for educational support or for DLA.

It is the constant fighting for support that wears parents down, more than living with the disability itself.

The recession seems to have hardened peoples attitudes against disabled people - just take a look at the AIBU threads.

So no, I don't believe that it would advance the cause of disabled children and their families at all. Not in the slightest.

Hmm, I suppose I simply look forward to there being an heir with ASD and though if it came in my ds' life time he would have to deal with so much prejudice. Likewise CP perhaps for others, or Dyspraxia.

I do have a bit of a soft spot for the Bercows, John Bercow has attemped to improve the position re:NHS SALT, via Bercow review/involvement with Ican, and was involved in presenting a bill to ensure speech therapy provision at Young Offenders institutions.

have met John Bercow earlier in the year, he is very nice and funny. We were invited to the speakers house, for an evening raising awareness of an autism school.

I just read this very sad article and thought of your thread Star. We live in better times thank goodness, though sometimes it does not feel that way !

"Hmm, I suppose I simply look forward to there being an heir with ASD"

I didnt know this story about the cousins. In this day and age? Royal family have gone down WAY down in my thoughts of them. No excuse. This out of site out of mind rubbish stinks and there are enough generations now that could have made a difference........IF they wanted too

I dont think there is anything wrong with this thread, its a bit uncomfortable reading perhaps but it shouldn't be. Why shouldn't we be able to wonder what would happen if a royal heir had an ASD? Why should it be taboo to discuss it? Why should we be at the thought of an ASD heir? It is said that one in ten people have some kind of ASD, having one should be seen as far more normal and accepted than it is. All these threads on the SN talking about our children being side-lined and failed because of their disabilities and so, so many of us. Thats the sad thing, not whether or not someone IMPORTANT might end up with an ASD.

"I believe there is a reason autism, severe manic-depression, and schizophrenia remain in our gene pool even though there is much suffering as a result.? Temple Grandin.

I dont see anything wrong with the thread at all. Its just a genuine thought. I dont think its taboo to discuss it. But I wouldnt wish any child to have ASD, even if it might make a difference. I am not thinking of them (the Royals) I am thinking of the child. Yes it would get everything going private wise but I still hate the thought of a child suffering like mine has. Also I cant see them making an asd child king or queen. And so you would be left with an ex ASD heir living a very hard life with standards being drummed into him or her for all his child/adult life for nothing. I think that child would suffer more in the long run than ours.

Edward and Sophies daughter Louise has LD and was a bridesmaid at the wedding of Wills and Kate. I didn't watch it, not my thing, but it didn't raise any profiles.

Docu on Thursday this week channel 4, 9pm about the Queens cousins who have been institutionalised all their lives. One now dead, the other 85 and still there.
They've had no visitors since 1960.
Apparently when asked about them the Queen mum said 'One can't be expected to keep up with all of ones relatives'!!!!!

Absolutely echo Time Travellers post.

I was going to mention Lady Louise. I know her parents try very hard to keep her out of the spotlight.