If you are a parent/carer for a SN child or children?

[YouaretooniceNOT]

How many hours/days/nights respite do you have?

My son has 2 alternate Saturday mencap 19am to 3.30pm

4 weekdays respite care - every school holiday - 9am to 4pm

10 hours per month direct payments - £171.00

I need more - i would like a weekend to myself every 3 months - i am going to ask the SW tomorrow
Any tips what i can say to her?

I m a lone parent with NO support network or other family.

I have one son whom is blind, severly autistic, no speech, doubly incontinent and dependent for all cares.

Thanks x

I am sorry I was not aware the op had been posting imflamatory posts.
I do feel guilty for what we get compared to others, but we get that respite for a reason that I don't really want to go into detail about.
It just hit a raw nerve at the time without knowing the back story.
:( today, that's all. Sorry.

Whatever you get it is surely for very good reasons as the powers that be are very stingy about offering any help to anyone without a great deal of effort on the part of the parent.
Of course you don't have to go into details about it, but you really shouldn't feel any guilt at accepting the little on offer.

Pqr, if there's anything we can do without you needing to tell us, please feel free to yell. It's what we are here for X

And if not anyway. SN can be crap. I have a very violent 11 year old, and I know this to be true, especially as many have it far worse than me. Sometimes all we can offer is a hug but there are plenty here.

And well done for standing up for the person you perceived to be the underdog; an admirable trait.

PQR, you are very lucky to get that respite, and you will definitely deserve it. You can't get respite just for a few hours shopping. Don't feel guilty about it, and really, don't apologise.

I get a good respite package for my ds who has SLD, challenging behaviour, needs all cares, doesn't sleep much and is heading for adulthood. It is a lot better than some people's respite packages, but it isn't as good as others. It used to be complete shit and it has improved over the years with a lot of fighting on our behalf. We would have sunk without it.

I am not sure what has so bothered everyone about the OP, but this thread illustrates why I would never let on exactly how much respite we get. The responses are bitter and full of envy and I hope the OP - and everyone else on here - gets more help.

This is exactly what Social Services need - parents turning against each other instead of fighting the real enemy - a system that does not care

Maybe the OP wants another child because having just one child who is severely disabled can make a parent grieve desperately for a 'normal' experience of parenthood?

I have a son who is nearly 17 with complex LD/ADHD it is very likely he has autism but is only just starting the diagnosis process due to children's services here not wanting to label them.

The first respite I ever got was in February the only reason I'm finally getting help is because in January I reached breaking point when he violently assaulted me and had to get the police involved, I told adult services that I wanted them to find him some form of supported living.