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SN children

Here are some suggested organisations that offer expert advice on special needs.

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Original poster

AArgh! How do you feed a fussy eater who has little understanding....

82 replies

heartinthecountry · 13/09/2005 18:38

Am at my wits end with dd's eating. She used to be quite a good varied eater but just recently is refusing loads of things she used to eat. I can probably now count on one hand the things she will eat and all of them are sweet (fruit, biscuits).

I know toddlers often do this. And I suppose developmentally she is prob hitting 18 months. But my worry with dd is that it won't be a phase and she will just completely limit her own diet forever.

So what do I do? What techniques can I use? If any? Bearing in mind that she has no concept of bribery (e.g if you eat a mouthful of this you can have this) or consequences. And also rarely shows any hunger because of her medication.... so I don't think 'eat this or you get nothing' type approaches are going to work (also she is a bit underweight anyway).

Or do I just accept it? Find that very hard to do though - feel terrible guilt that I am unable to feed my daughter a healthy diet. Especially when it would probably help her development.

OP posts:

Original poster

heartinthecountry · 13/09/2005 22:48

Fio - I fry them in olive oil anyway - they are actually nicer that way!

What d'you reckon jamie would make of our kids diets hey? Shall we challenge him to get them eating 'proper' food .

Hi TC - things are okay. Dd is getting more 'difficult' generally adn tbh the food thing is just one of several things at the moment that used to be relatively easy and are getting more difficult. I think that's really why I am worried about it.

OP posts:

Jimjams · 13/09/2005 22:49

I would love to see Jamie have a go- PMSL. Throw in bloody supernanny as well while you're at it.

Jimjams · 13/09/2005 22:50

I can imagine Jamie making up some kids special in a way that's appealing to kids and ds1 just shuddering and walking off- or pushing it away with a "urgh"

Thomcat · 13/09/2005 22:52

ohh mate, sorry they are getting more difficulat and I understand the eating thing being a worry etc.
Hopefully a few things on her can be implemented and might help?
Have her bowel movements changed at all? Lottie spends her life constipated and then recently its been the opposite b ut with that she hasn't stopped eating.

Original poster

heartinthecountry · 13/09/2005 22:52

She used to eat the sausages jimjams - now on the no list

TC - hadn't considered letting her eat something like moussaka with her fingers. Maybe I'll try the shepherd's pie that way.

OP posts:

Thomcat · 13/09/2005 22:55

Hmmm, well in that case, try a bit of spag bol and shepherds pie as well and sneak in loads of veg to the recipe. Or if no time M&S and Blue Parrot go down v well in this house? Ohhh good luck HITC.

Fio2 · 13/09/2005 22:56

i havent all told you about the jamie dinners have I??????!!!!

dd kept having really bad runs before the school broke up and I kepyt having to keep her off, send stool sample off, would all be alright, then she would go back to school then the repeat would happen. Anyway this went on for 3 or 4 weeks. In the end i decided to send her in with a packed lunch instead of school dinners. i went in a few days after she had been having packed lunch to collect her as she had a hospital appointment. The teacher said to me, i dont know why you are sending her in with packed lunches as the menu has changed anyway with the school dinners. i said oh when was that and she said about 4 1/2 weeks ago (which co-incided with the start of her runs!) we are having jamie oliver dinners now she said

so its official my dear daughter prefers crap!

Saker · 13/09/2005 22:56

Would she eat pancakes do you think? You can make them lots of different ways e.g. I have a good recipe with ricotta cheese which you can't taste in the pancake or you could use yoghurt and you can sweeten them with fruit or fruit purees or syrup or whatever. And eat them with your fingers.

Mind Ds2 eats EVERYTHING with his fingers, has even been known to try and scoop up soup so what I think is edible with fingers probably covers quite a range.

Jimjams · 13/09/2005 22:58

PMSL FIO

Can you get gf spaghetti? I've only ever seen pasta and macaroni. NOt that ds1 will eat either, but I could cut some up for ds3 (gf until 2) and ds2 would have it.

aloha · 13/09/2005 22:59

Dunno about HITC, but I'm going to use Thomcat's carrot game with my ds tomorrow! He'll love it!

Jimjams · 13/09/2005 22:59

We give buckwheat pancakes- buckwheat and rice flour mix with cheese hidden inside. For years it was the only protein ds1 was getting (as he wouldn't eat meat). Still happens - twice a week.

aloha · 13/09/2005 23:00

I think vitamin tablets alleviate a lot of guilt, actually. Plus IQ in his morning milk...

Saker · 13/09/2005 23:01

Oh yeah sorry, forgot about the flour; I have made them with buckwheat flour also (by mistake in France where I couldn't read the packet properly) although they weren't so nice IMO.

Thomcat · 13/09/2005 23:01

HITC Sainsburys do GF spaghetti, I buy it for Lottie, and us now.

Saker · 13/09/2005 23:03

In terms of games, one thing that used to work for my Ds1 when he was about 18months was sitting his teddy or doll alongside him and doing, "A spoon for teddy" (pretend to feed teddy) , "and a spoon for Ds1".

Thomcat · 13/09/2005 23:04

LOL Aloha, it's great fun and has never failed me. She thinks it's great and it cracks me up to see her with a huge bit of broccoli, shoving it in her mouth before I can get to her!

Thomcat · 13/09/2005 23:04

ohhhh saker I really like that buckwheat flour.

aloha · 13/09/2005 23:05

It's exactly the sort of thing ds loves. He'll think it's hilarious. When he finds something really funny and excited he gets sort of paralysed and collapsed and can't move. It's very funny.
And he's been a bugger about eating dinner lately too.

Thomcat · 13/09/2005 23:07

sorry HITC, but Aloha, oh that'll be great then, promise to post or email me and tell me how it goes, please.

Saker · 13/09/2005 23:08

The things we do! Dh used to sit there with his eyes closed pretending he was about to eat a spoonful of Ds1's dinner in sheer bliss at the loveliness, whilst allowing Ds1 to eat it off the spoon so he couldn't get it. If that makes sense. Ds1 used to be begging for more dinner he enjoyed it so much. Ds2 likes these types of games but always spits his mouthful out again afterwards .

Thomcat · 13/09/2005 23:10

LOL Saker

pixel · 13/09/2005 23:10

My ds refuses anything of a 'wet' texture which rules out most things unfortunately and he always finds sneakily hidden peas etc. My latest secret weapon is marmite. He loves the stuff and as it has such a strong flavour and smell it's good for disguising other things in sandwiches. Just recently I've got him to eat Dairylea and little bits of watercress that way. You won't believe how it cheered me up to know that he had eaten GREENS without knowing!
The only other thing I can think of is to try and present foods in different ways. For instance, my ds has never accepted milk (not even flavoured milkshakes)out of any form of bottle, mug, beaker or carton. But he will happily eat bowls of cereal served with milk!

Thomcat · 13/09/2005 23:12

kids are funny aren't they. Lottie will eat a bit of bread, and a bit of cheese in the same meal, but point blank refuses to go near a cheese sandwich!

ghosty · 13/09/2005 23:12

Haven't had time to read the whole thread but I am constantly amazed at how DD gets through the day with what she eats (or doesn't eat for that matter)
The only decent meal she eats is a bowl of porridge in the morning and so I crush up a good children's vitamin in there (jimjams already mentioned them I think) ... and yes, it does alleviate some of my guilt but even if she did eat well (like my DS does) I would still give them to her as I think supplementation is vital.
At morning tea time she may have a slice of apple.
At lunch she will eat half a small slice of ham and two bits of cucumber (which she calls 'bumbumbumbum' )
I usually do microwave popcorn for DS when he gets home from school (which I don't think is too unhealthy, better than crisps) at3pm and DD loves those .... will devour them.
She hasn't eaten an evening meal for about 3 months now ... she may eat a bit of a fish finger or a bit of a sausage but she won't touch vegetables. The only vegetables I can get into her are from a particular baby jar ... Organic Vegetable Risotto for 9mths+.
I do give her snacks during the day, but only offer healthy ones (fruit, bumbumbumbum, crackers etc). She does like the odd biscuit but they are strictly rationed.
It is beyond me how she is still on the 98th percentile for weight and height.
Nightmare ... but she sleeps through the night and is healthy ish ... what else can I do but hope that she will grow out of this phase?

aloha · 13/09/2005 23:14

I still spoonfeed ds quite often, and he's four on Saturday. You do what you have to do.
Will let you know how the carrot game goes TC!

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