Got that back to school feeling?

[imahappycamper]

DS has been really good so far this holiday and suddenly i have that "back to school" sinking feeling. Am I the only one who is dreading it?

No me too. Ds said today that he doesn't want to go back to school because he's scared of getting into trouble and maybe getting excluded. AS starts soon so I'm hoping for some support at last.

I'm counting down with glee, but at the same time worried about how DS1 will cope with a new teacher and classroom. He'd only just got settled into year 1 when they broke up for the holidays and now he'll have to start out all over again - with a teacher who will also have to learn how to deal with him.

No, you're not the only one. DS1 (he's 7) is just DS1 at home - faults and all. We're used to him and manage his funny little ways (ice cream for breakfast and pjs on to the shops). But he's not the label. He's not the boys with the 'problems'. He's just our son.

Yes, it's been tough. We've had a lot of screaming at DS2 who, at 4, is very unpredictable and a bit crazy, which means that DS1 finds him impossible to play with. I've also had days when he just doesn't want to go out of the house.

However, that pales into insiginficance compared to the stress of school, statutory assessment applications, getting DS1 to fit in to another person's timetable etc.

I could cry if I think about it too much as DS2 is starting school in Sept too. I am trying to finish my PhD and I need the time, but I would much rather see DS1 happy.

This summer he has:

tried new foods - even yoghurt!
tried to wear new clothes
learnt to tell the time
practised swimming

All of this is a MASSIVE advance and shows how much school gets in the way of his development as he would, ordinarily, be too stressed to try this.

Oh God....why does he have to go back! We get our reply on a SA request by the 10th and I;m just steeling myself for another battle.

At least, we haven't got the ridiculously stupid and feckless teachers we had last year!!

I've got it too. My DS (ASD) asks every morning 'school today?' with a worried look. Not looking forward to saying 'yes'

He's come on a lot in the holidays. It's been intense for us but the interation and patience he gets from us clearly works.

That's why I'm seriously considering flexi-schooling. I beleive he needs his peers (only child) but I also believe he needs us.

I'm looking forward to them going back :)

But I can totally understand why some of you aren't.

Spinkle - how old is your DS and what kind of hours would you look for? How do you think the school would go with that?

I agree that the patience you can give him and the knowledge of how to engage him is soemthing that really helps. DS really needs lots of 1:1!

He's 6 in a couple of weeks so starting year 1. I work part time as a teacher (primary) so I don't think there would be too many objections to me having him at home for 2 days a week. It'd be discretionery (sp?) decision from the headteacher.

He has a statement for 25 hours a week plus SALT every fortnight. I think the noise and busy-ness of the classroon become wearing for DS and he's frequently had enough come Thursday.

I thought some ABA type stuff might be good on those days.

Interesting. I'm not sure our Head would go for it but it sounds attractive as DS is really ground down by 5 days of school. He gets very tired. He doesn't cause anyone any trouble (generally) but he will probably end up lying on the floor, not taking anything in when exhausted and I have, on a couple of occasions, let him stay off when I could see he was overwhelmed.

Not sure how DS2 would take that though!

I'm dreading it, too
Although things have been far from easy, dd1 has been 'herself' and has been as relaxed as it possible for her to be

I really can't bear to think about all of the stress and worry that going back to school always brings and I dread seeing dd becoming low and anxious again.

I home-edded her for a while, prior to finding her current school, and I have a secret yearning to do it again, because she was so much calmer and relaxed. However, she felt 'different' so it was a Catch 22 situation.

I'm looking forward to it and apprehensive in equal measures. Looking forward because the holidays are bloody hard work and I end up feeling guilty that I can't give DS2 1:1 enough of the time. Apprehensive because we have a new teacher and classroom to cope with (though thankfully same lovely TAs) and classroom isn't as well suited to DS2 as last year's (ie.no room for his work station). Apprehensive because his 1:1 hours have been cut and he'll be spending Friday afternoons (CHEERS time - free play) without direct supervision. Apprehensive because when I enquired about supervision at lunch time from Sept they had forgotten he needed it . All these things are solvable - the school are basically lovely and always try to sort problems out - but it'll mean going into hyper-aware mode again - because however lovely they are, if I don't notice something's wrong then no-one does.

ds has started his final year only problem is I'm having to take him as the council buggered up the transport and dh knows the company involved are refuses to let him go with them. He was having to travel 40 miles each way due to other pick ups but its now just over 30 so 120 miles a day for me what joy.

Have mixed feelings, ds should start new nursery (at the school he will 'hopefully' be going to next year) but they still don't have a worker in place for him, as in have not advertised!! so he will get a late start, which is sad cos will not be with others.. but might, just might, suit him better, except it will probably be weeks late, and his time at nursery (2 sessions a week) is my work time! eek... Although am lucky to also have portage leaning on them too...

I feel so sad that school will resume soon. The holidays have flown past so quickly this year...

I have mixed feelings, DS has been fairly chilled and relaxed this summer.
DS is starting reception in september.
He wasn't really a problem for the staff at nursery, he went 3 afternoons a week, but was quite withdrawn for the first 2.5 h of each session then at 3.30pm when most of the pre-school sessions children went home, he'd be more relaxed, talkative and interacting.

Now he is going to be in a class of 30, 5 days a week.
I'm worried that he will withdraw further.
And i'm worried that his very challenging behaviours at home will return but worse....

borderslass- that's some school run. Mine is 52 miles a day, every day, but preferable to the alternatives.
I think my sinking feeling comes from the same fears as others on here. DS is 15 and last term was the first time he had got to the end of term without going on part time school since he was in Year 5. We have even been able to reduce his meds over the holidays below the level the Paed was aiming for, but I know when he goes back and everything crowds in on him we will end up raising the meds again and I will be back to dreading the phone ringing and the school's name coming up on the display.
fightingthelea, debs40, genieinabottle et al glad I'm not alone.

Nope, looking forward to it. DD starts specialist unit this year - hurrah!
Also what with illness and very long holidays here in France she's been home since 21st June and even she's starting to look forward to school. Actually more worried about my little NT one who starts school this year as I think it will a bit of a shock for him! Only thing is that transport has not yet been confirmed so think I might have a week or two of 2 kids in schools in different towns so not quite sure how I'm going to work that...DH can do one of the drop offs but pick up could be i n t e r e s t i n g.

Looking forward to it here too.

dd1 will be overjoyed to be back - she loves it. There's a new teacher starting, though, so a little bit of apprehension, but am sure it will be fine. dd1 made so much progress in the 6 months she has been there, that we are all looking forward to what a new school year might bring.

I am more worried about dd2 starting pre-school. She is both so very ready for it, and so very very vulnerable - she is a sensitive little soul, and we are increasingly thinking AS-type thoughts about her, so time will tell, i guess.

borderslass - I sympathise with your school run - I "only" do 60 miles a day now, but before we moved, I had a 40 mile each way journey too - it's not much fun.

We are in the dreading it camp.

DS is going into his last year at Preschool, which is lovely but he hates going and so I have the screaming 5 days a week at drop off time.

Having said that the holidays have been a nightmare. DS2 has learnt lots of new things but DS1 is fed up with it all and I am fed up with all the crying.

We are looking forward to it. DS (4.2 ASD) has been so full on over the hols but we have just started to make a book with pics and he loves it. Thought he would be toilet trained but a definite no and won't be. We gave up after 2 weeks as we were regressing all other areas ie behaviour, sleep etc. Not that the pressure is of he is actually a lot calmer. He has a Statement of 25 hours. Am dreading telling the teacher he will still be in pull-ups (he will be there all day). Can I expect them to change him at least once a day? Sorry for hijack!

I have done supply teaching in schools where AS chilren have their nappies changed. You need to talk to the Head about it because some schools will have policies about it which involve one person doing the changing while another person is there for child protection issues and it will take a bit of organising. I don't think they can refuse though.

overthebar - "Can I expect them to change him at least once a day?"

Absolutely - and whenever it's needed otherwise. Both my DS have nappies changed at school by their 1:1.

I'm really not looking forward to them going back to school :(

Ds is so much easier to manage at home, which sounds ridiculous as when term he's not here for 6 hours a day, but the getting him ready, the meltdowns as soon as he's finished school...I dread it!

I've seriously considered HE for them both (dd is NT but is very quiet and has asked me to home ed her), but dh is dead set against the idea :(

Dreading it camp here. Both my 2 going into reception. Action for Inclusion document is a farse for my ds and my dd needs, although minor in comparison, aren't even being recognised. We got a letter from the neurologist yesterday to give the school, it says that they need to provide her with a quiet place to lie down during the school day. He clearly hasn't got a clue about schools!!

I think the biggest thing I'm dreading is the empty house though . 4.5yrs of unplanned chaos, its going to feel very quiet and empty during the day.