how do you put your baby down to sleep?

[mamamila]

dd2 is 4 months but has never gone to sleep in a bed by herself. in the day she will fall asleep on breast but wake up if moved even slightly, she will only sleep in our arms or in a sling or occasionally out in the pram. she doesn't like not being held basically.
i've accommodated this until now but would really love her to nap in her bed. she has amby nest she'll sleep in at night 9pm-2am if transferred in deep deep sleep and i've bought a proper cot too in hope she might prefer it for napping. but she just get agitated then howls if she's ever put down awake and wakes immediately or within minutes if she's put down asleep

so i'd like to know what you all do...??

herb ur right, it is just a phase. it will pass. i tell that to myself with lots of things to do with my boys!

how did your LO sleep last night?

Out like a light at 8, dreamfeed of 5oz at midnight. Awake at 3 - nappy and boob - and at 6.30, when he was settled with dummy. Maybe I need to make the dreamfeed bigger...

thats great! my LO takes around 7 oz at dreamfeed but then again he is nearly 11 months. does he nap well during the day?

No he doesn't! He might have three or four naps, but none any longer than 40 minutes, and sometimes only 20. I'm sure he needs more sleep in the day, as first thing in the morning he's all sparkly and lovely, but by the end of the day he's cranky and tired. But I don't know how to get him to sleep longer - I've tried intervening as he wakes up, and shushing and patting, rocking him in the pushchair, etc, but once he's awake, that's it.

Feeling pretty grim today. The tiredness is really getting to me.

heron - 11 months already! and herb - 5 months!

DS2 is 6 and half months. He is crawling too and also has two teeth. He tends to go to bed at about 8pm-8.30pm. No dream feed here as i am so tired I tend to go to bed not too long after him. LOL

He then usually wakes at 2 for feed and nappy change. This morning he woke at 5 am but I have discovered if I get him and put him into bed wiht me he will then fall back to sleep, so can;t be hungry! Today he then slept till just gone 7am.

During the day I aim for a short half hour at about 10 am.ish - this can vary from 9.30 till 11.30 to start though.

Then a two hour nap early/mid afternoon.

I find if he fits in another late afternoon nap then he doesn't go to bed till about 9.30pm

Christ. Dreamfeed at 11, 7oz. Then awake with a dirty nappy at 1.30, and wouldn't go back to sleep without boob. Woke at 4, resettled with dummy. Woke at 6, fed. Now still asleep at 8.20, when I need to leave the house.

Had a horrible thought - he seems to sleep 5 hours between feeds at night. Maybe he needs to go to bed at 6, have his DF at 11, one more at 4, and up at 6. UP AT 6????

morning herb ah what a tiring night you had! my LO has his first bottle at 5pm, then another one at 5.45pm, goes down at 6pm. then dreamfeed at around 11pm. lucky for me, he does not usually poo at night, and even when he does, it does not bother him.

my two cents worth here: i think he can do with out the feed at 4am. how much did he take at 4am? was he genuinely hungry? and fed again at 6am? also how much milk does he take during the day?

bear in mind that it can become a habit (rather than need) feeding at 4am.

with my LO, i find that as long as i get most of his feed into him between 7am and 7pm, plus the dreamfeed, he is ok after midnight. there is no way i am waking up feeding him between midnight and 7am!

herb also yes, my LO is up by 6.30am, but i do not go pick him up until i am up. however, with the school run, i am up by half 6 anyway! cant wait for the hols, so can sleep in!

Oh, I don't feed him at the 4am slot. Just shush, and dummy, and he's off again. Not sure why he wakes up.

I try to feed him as much as poss during the day, so he doesn't wake up as much at night, but it's not going so well. He's breastfed, but gets very distracted these days, so may well not be eating enough. I give him the odd top up of formula, but he only takes 2-3oz, which makes me think he's not that hungry. I don't want to feed more than every three hours in the day, as then he's just snacking and getting lots of foremilk.

Now might be the time to switch to formula, but I feel too guilty. And in any case it might not do the trick, and my milk will have dried up, and I'll feel even worse! Also, having the boob on hand as a middle-of-the-night comforter is very handy!

herb i completely get what u mean! i b/f LO till he was 6 1/2 months old. i felt guilty stopping. i expressed milk for him because he had reflux which was diagnosed at 5 weeks. so i felt like a dairy cow. i was expressing every 3 hours. good thing about expressing is that you see how much he is taking.

guilt is a horrible thing! it is def a mummy thing!

Bad night for me too.

DS in bed asleep at 8pm
Me in bed asleep at 10pm
DS woke at 11.30 pm for feed - quite hungry
DS woke at 2.30 - another feed! and pooey nappy
DS woke at 6am - I ignored him and he moaned on and off till 7.30am.
Fed him at 7.30 but funnily enough wasn't that hungry!
Arghhhh

In between all this I had DS1 in bed with me "hug me mummy, hug me" . So feeling a bit tired today. LOL

cece ah what a night
how old is ur DS1? my DS1 is 5.

ok bedtime for DS2.

oh lord, sometimes i really hate bedtime, it is a hard juggle with a 5 yr old and a 11 month old.

herb sorry i read ur post wrong! ok, no feed at 4am, hmmm, yes, not sure why he wakes. my LO gets very distracted while feeding as well. i have to give him something to hold (some kind of toy or paper) so that he focuses on what is in front of him and feeds.

maybe you can try that?

morning cece herb how did ur LO sleep last night?

Mixed. He only had two short naps yesterday, so was a nightmare by bedtime.

DP put him to bed last night, and apparently DS wouldn't settle without starting a second bottle. He then woke up at 11, so I BFed him, and at 2.30, with a wet nappy. I BFed him to sleep. He then woke grumbling throughout the night, but settled himself back to sleep, and didn't wake properly until 8.

He's now got a cold, again, to complicate matters.

I keep looking for a pattern: if I give him a dreamfeed, and a clean nappy, will he make it until morning? He seems able to go 5 or 6 hours between night feeds, so how can I ensure just one night waking? Etc Etc.

As a friend said yesterday, what's so confusing about it all is that in the rest of life, there's a discernible cause and effect. If I do 'a', then 'b' happens. But with babies and their sleep, there seems to be no such pattern.

herb how wet does his nappy get? what kind are you using? the ones i use for my LO is so absorbent that he stays dry really.

it is good that he settled himself back to sleep.

just thinking that if you put him down at 6pm with lots of milk, clean nappy. give him dream feed at 10pm. what does he wear to bed? babygros? when my LO was younger, he wore those gown things, so that changing nappy does not involve all those bloody poppers. and is much quicker.

another thought. with my LO, he has feed at 5pm, 6pm then he goes down. so he has a total of around 450ml - 500ml of milk. then a dreamfeed later at around half ten.

Too right, there is no pattern, that is why it is so frustrating!

Not too bad last night. DS2 woke at about 3.30 for a feed but not enormously hungry. I changed his nappy but it was just wet not poo. Unfortunately his crying woke up DS1 who appeared and asked if he could play on the wii

So it took a while to convince him to go to bed. In the end he went into my bed and I joined him once DS2 was finished... Good job we have a spare bed for DH. LOL!

Good job DD sleeps well isn't it? DS1 is 6 (and DD is 8) so really should be old enough to sleep a bit better.

hi cece you have 3? wow! i got 2 and am run off my feet!

I generally put DS (15 weeks) down after he's asleep. When he was younger and in the Moses basket I used to feed him lying on the bed, both of us on a towel, then pick up the towel with him on and tuck in the edges around the mattress. Then he wouldn't wake up from touching the cold sheets. I don't do that any more (but still use a towel for night feeds to avoid milky bed). So perhaps you could try something similar so when you put her down she is still lying on something warm that smells of you? Or maybe you've tried that already? Good luck anyway.

hi heron. I'm not sure he wakes up because of his wet nappy, but once he's awake it keeps him awake, IYKWIM. When he was sleeping through wet nappies never bothered him. Good old Pampers!

He wears a vest, babygro and grobag. Sometimes I put a blanket on him if it seems cold.

Last night we didn't do a dreamfeed, as an experiment, and he woke at 12, then 3.30. Then 7.30 for good.

I dump my DD in her hammock at some point when it feels like I put the other DC to bed ages ago and really ought to unload and load the dishwasher. Beforehand she has either been on my lap, feeding on and off while I read/mumsnet or been playing in her bouncy chair til bored. I always give her a quick feed and she may or may not fall asleep during. Either way, I pick her up say goodnight and plonk her in. If she cries for more than 5 mins I get her out, and try again within 15-30 mins.

She sleeps roughly 8, 9 or 10pm til 7, 8, 9 or sometimes 10.30 am usually.

Well been to see the health visitor.

She thinks he needs more carbohydrates in his food plus she has recommended I leave him to cry if he wakes in the night. She said she thought he shouldn't need the middle of the night feed! So I might give it a go once the schools have broken up. Then it won't matter so much if he wakes the other two up! Will discuss with DH later.

Well, by some fluke DS slept through last night! I couldn't believe it, and kept waking up in anticipation of him waking.

Didn't do much differently yesterday, except slightly more milk and a longer nap. No doubt all go tits up today, as we've been out and about and he hasn't had his quota of either today...

It must be catching! DS2 slept through too last night! Ha, that won't happen again for a while!