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Original poster

Not one full night yet

30 replies

Spoo · 31/05/2005 22:07

MY four month DS is still not sleeping through. We are suffering and are both very sleep deprived. DH would like to try controlled crying. Is he too young? Does anyone have any advice? He has a very good betime routine and generally goes to sleep okay in the evenings but wakes during the night.

OP posts:
snafu · 31/05/2005 22:08

CC isn't generally advised before 6 months, spoo. How is he going to sleep - on his own, cuddled, fed to sleep?

handlemecarefully · 31/05/2005 22:10

yes he is too young for controlled crying - I think the official line is not before 6 months.

I don't know about other people's experiences but my dd didn't sleep through until she was about 6 months, and ds not until he was 9 / 10 months.

Personally I think you are being over ambitious expecting ds not to be sleeping through. Sympathies re you feeling knackered though - it is tough going isn't it!

handlemecarefully · 31/05/2005 22:11

typo in that, I meant: over ambitious in expecting your 4 month old ds to sleep through!

Original poster
Spoo · 31/05/2005 22:12

He goes to sleep on his own but is quite drowsy from last feed. I tried leaving him tonight but he got in a complete paddy, eventually falling asleep in DH arms.

OP posts:
Original poster
Spoo · 31/05/2005 22:13

It just seems every other baby is sleeping through.

OP posts:
kama · 31/05/2005 22:14

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn

snafu · 31/05/2005 22:14

I really do sympathise - sleep deprivation is an absolute killer. But - hate to say it - 4 months is still very young to be sleeping through. Is he very hungry for a feed when waking?

snafu · 31/05/2005 22:15

LOL - just seen your last post! Believe me - every other baby is not sleeping through, no matter what their mothers may tell you

aloha · 31/05/2005 22:16

My ds woke up constantly at that age. My dd,who I think is a wonder sleeper does still wake up fairly often - but she has a five min feed and goes straight back to sleep with is OK with me. What does your ds do?
Don't get hung up on what other people say their kids are doing. People do lie, you know. And anyway, it's not relevant to your ds.
My ds won't/can't tell me when he wants a wee. He's 3.8. They are all different. Not sleeping is a big hassle though, I do know that, believe me.

huggybear · 31/05/2005 22:16

ds1 is 3 and still doesnt sleep through, he's up about 4 times in the night, but ds2 sleeps through, probably cause he's had to iykwim. ds1 never had a very good routine, he slept in my bed til ds2 came along so i think that might be why he's still waking. he only wakes up for a hug

gingernut · 31/05/2005 22:16

Mine isn't yet, at 6 months. He doesn't want a feed, he just wakes . So you're not on your own, but I can't really help, sorry.

Bozza · 31/05/2005 22:16

Neither of mine slept through and neither of my nephews at this age. How often does he wake and for how long? Are you breast or bottle feeding?

handlemecarefully · 31/05/2005 22:16

Are you sure Spoo?

I joined an NCT tea group with my firstborn so had quite a basis for comparison, and most of the mums there didn't have sleeping through babies at 4 months. Not saying it is unheard of, just that ime it is unusual.

Are you breast or bottle feeding? If bottle feeding then perhaps you and your dh can take it in turns dealing with the night time wakings.

If breastfeeding - well it is more down to you I guess! When I was breastfeeding I found it easier to have baby in bed with me (sod the anti co-sleeping advice) so that I could feed without fully waking up

pixiefish · 31/05/2005 22:20

hi spoo - regarding your comment about all babies sleeping through- i think that that happens in their dreams tbh! but seriously 4 months is very young. dd is 16 months and still not sleeping through ( she has eczema though so that adds to our problems)I worried that other kids were sleeping through and that i was doing some damage to her long term health but honestly listening to other people makes your job as a mummy harder (not the supportive MN i hasten to add)

snafu · 31/05/2005 22:21

This probably isn't the right time to tell you that ds is two in a couple of weeks and is still hit-and-miss with the sleeping through thing - is it?

handlemecarefully · 31/05/2005 22:23

probably not snafu

Spoo - I'm getting consistent sleeping through until 7 am with my nearly 3 year old and 13 month old so it does happen eventually!

snafu · 31/05/2005 22:26

Sorry! It's more hit than miss though, honest, and it started around 10 months...

[backpedals furiously]

handlemecarefully · 31/05/2005 22:26

lol...

Original poster
Spoo · 31/05/2005 22:50

I am bottle feeding - hence we take it in turns. he does seem to be hungry at night but maybe I am responding to his need for attention with food and helping him off to sleep by being on the bottle again.

Thanks for all your words of encouragement. I should ignore all the other mummys and manage my own boy.

OP posts:
clary · 01/06/2005 00:05

Oh Spoo, all the other babies are not sleeping though, as others say here their mummies are lying.
Sympathy for you tho. How often does he wake - is he stretching out night-time feeds at all? (ie is there light at the end of the tunnel??)

piglit · 01/06/2005 10:12

Spoo - I so understand how you feel. I joined an NCT class and all but one of the other mums told me their dbs were sleeping through at 10 weeks. It turned out that 3 of them were lying and I seriously believe that their lies contributed to my mild pnd. I thought I was doing something wrong and doubted myself all the time.

My ds only started sleeping through from 6 and a half months (and that's not every night) and there were times when I was so desperate for more than 4 hours sleep that I used to go to bed at 7.30pm (I can thoroughly recommend it!). Please don't worry, it will come right in the end - all of sudden your ds will sleep through. If he's having a good feed when he wakes at night then he's simply not ready to sleep through and you could try feeding him up a bit more during the day. When he first sleeps through you'll probably lie awake half the night waiting for him to wake up!

Mosschops30 · 01/06/2005 10:23

Message withdrawn

HappyDaddy · 01/06/2005 10:40

My dd only just started sleeping through, she's just turned 1!
she sleeps better now she has food and no more milk from a bottle.

otto · 01/06/2005 10:50

Spoo. You really do have my sympathies. I know how hard it is to deal with that level of sleep deprivation, particularly when you seem to be the only mother experiencing it. My ds was a dreadful sleeper and still is at 14 months I'm afraid to say, but that's to do with constant illness and teething.

When he was four months I used to leave my post-natal group and cry because everybody else seemed to have a baby that slept through from very early on. It's only when I started coming onto here that I realised that it was fairly common for babies to sleep badly and that you can do something about it when the time is right.

argon0 · 07/09/2005 16:50

Spoo, sympathies - we were pulling our hair out after only 3 weeks of this...

Our solution was SwaddleMes (which may not be suitable by 4mths - unsure) but try grobags instead (we are about to experiment while DS still fits in his SwaddleMes), Oh, & Daddy (me) giving him last feed at night, while warming moses basket mattress under my buttocks, prior to swaddling him ('bout 11p.m.) - Mummy having disappeared to bed a little while earlier - DS then sleeps through 'til 5 or 6 in a.m. when he gets his next feed..

Argon0