Meet the Other Phone. Only the apps you allow.

Meet the Other Phone.
Only the apps you allow.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Sleep

Join our Sleep forum for tips on creating a sleep routine for your baby or toddler. Need more advice on your childs development? Sign up to our Ages and Stages newsletter here.

AP has broken me - considering CC

54 replies

dorisbonkers · 26/08/2009 16:17

I'll keep this brief. I never set out to follow a specific parenting method, and have never read any books, but have fallen into the attachment camp - co-sleeping, frequent breastfeeding, BLW, slinging. I don't even have a pram 10 months in.

My daughter from birth has only had one night of 7-hour sleep (and I think that was the jaundice...). We were happy to co-sleep, breastfeed to sleep if it were 2-5 night wakings. Well, for the past month it has been 6-8 night wakings. She's teething now and I've been feeding to sleep every 20 minutes sometimes. I spend my nights in bed seething, buzzed, unable to sleep when she's finally asleep. I'm bruised from her pinching, scratched. I've not had a shower in two days and I

My husband works nights so has to sleep in the day -- necessitating long trips out with her in the sling. So I'm alone most evenings dealing with what feels like feeding a crocodile on crack in bed.

I have had 2 hours sleep in 48 hours, with one night before that when I got a few hours. A few nights last week I never slept. I've been rowing with DH, I nearly crashed our car and I have no energy, I want to shout at my gorgeous daughter and sometimes just sit listlessly looking at her. I'm not the mother I was a few weeks ago. I've been hospitalised for depression in my twenties and can recognise the dullness, anger, listlessness. I'm not there, but can feel it coming. I have totally lost my confidence. I feel my previous confidence has been drowned out and I constantly question my decisions and sometimes feel I'm putting my principles above my daughter's wellbeing. She needs a decent night's kip too.

I was adamant that I'd never do any sleep training and I'll admit that I swallowed the arguments for AP wholesale. With my non-sleep deprived hat on, I can recognise the benefits, but think they are sometimes overplayed -- like with the routine end of the spectrum too. But it feels gentle and kind and generally suits me.

Having no sleep at all does not suit me. I have for weeks endlessly run over CC in my mind but can't quite make the leap. I almost feel ready to.

Although my husband is very supportive, he's not here. I moved back to the UK recently and my mother's not that keen on visiting. So I feel little support, no backup, any outside help. I think that's key to AP being easy when it gets tough.

Can anyone reassure me, or talk me through CC? I may not do anything but I need to hear some sensible voices.

Or is it purely developmental? In which case I should try my best to weather the storm?

OP posts:
CoteDAzur · 07/09/2009 13:08

Avril - I don't know what "core night" technique is, but I have to point out that your baby can't have been "feeding" every half hour. If she wants to suckle every half hour, it sounds like she just needs the comfort of sucking, and I would recommend a dummy. You just might find that you are automatically down to 1-2 feeds a night.

Difference between CC to go down to one feed & CC to sleep through the night, imho, is like pulling a bandage slowly or in one go. Yes, it hurts more, but it's over much quicker and soon forgotten

AvrilH · 07/09/2009 13:22

I've tried dummies and tried them! They get spat into the air with a howl of outrage. "Core night" is just never feeding the baby after they have shown they can sleep that long, so gradually extending the length the baby sleeps. Usually used for much younger babies.

I'll see if I have the guts to do CC for the whole night tonight. Depends on how the first part goes really. Sleeping through the night has seemed like an unobtainable dream, but I am amazed at how we were able to sort out bedtime battles and naps with CC in just a couple of days. So maybe we will have quick success by going for the whole night, here's hoping anyway

AvrilH · 07/09/2009 13:25

And Dorisbonkers, whatever sleep training technique you use, I do reccomend starting with sorting out naps. It is so much easier to persevere in the cold light of day, and you know it will be over soon.

AvrilH · 08/09/2009 09:08

Report from night two:

7.45 sleep
10.54 woke, fell asleep again within 4 minutes
2.00 - 2.15 dreamfeed
6.12 woke, tried to breastfeed to sleep again but DD was wired so we got up and started the day

Dorisbonkers - I hope this is helpful to you as our situations were so similar. If not please just say and I will stop hijacking your thread!

My next step is following your advice, Cote D'Azur and stopping the dreamfeed. I can't believe how well this has gone so far.

New posts on this thread. Refresh page