4-5 month olds sleep club, - come and join..........

[SnowlightMcKenzie]

Hiya,

There have been so many threads lately about babies who were beginning to sleep better, but suddenly hitting this regression to newborn hell.

So I thought I would start a support thread for us all to compete whinge about how little sleep we are all getting, and tips on how to cope.

Baby Starlight was up just twice last night, but the previous night it was 6 times, and because of that I kept putting off going to bed at all last night, so even though it wasn't too bad, I still had hardly any sleep

I really really don't want to be on this thread!

DD is a week shy of 5 months, whatever that is in weeks, and she's been an effing nightmare since 13w, she was PERFECT before then and she also did a stint about two weeks ago of a sleeping right through. She used to go to bed at 10pm and wake up at 6am for a feed then back down to 8am. Now I've had to move her bedtime forwards to between 8-9pm because she becomes a devil child otherwise, and this has coincided with her waking up 2 or 3 times a night and starting the day at 6am. Or today at 5:20 - FFS, it's bloody Saturday, I should be in bed!

Debs My nipples are about 8 inches long now due to DD using her arms to push away from me whilst she's still sucking. Sometimes I have to fight the urge to throw her across the room when she does it!

I'm also unable to feed her in public anymore because she just will no concentrate and I'm always dodging exposing myself to the hole cafe.

In short, she is a PITA! I love her to pieces, she is my world, but God damn it why won't she SLEEEEEEEEP!?!?

Just on that first stretch thing - my ds has only ever slept well then (a few times extending it to 6 hours, but that doesn't really help anyone as he goes to bed at 6.30pm because he's knackered), then it's every couple of hours if we're lucky. Ho hum. I'd been thinking it's all my fault because I've not 'encouraged' him to self-settle, and so had been trying other baby-settling tactics too, but that article has made me think differently. Maybe for the next week I'll just feed at every waking and see what happens? But does anyone else have a dc who doesn't ever really cry for milk? It makes it really hard to tell when it's hunger and when it's something else.

Morning, I would like to join please!!
MY DS now 19 weeks was never a great sleeper to start with, very colicky and windy. He was EBF but now on mixed feeding for past 4 weeks and has even starting to wean onto purees which he is loving, takes it all very well, and has done his poo's the world of good (they were explosive, copious,green, smelly and infrequent previously). He has been through co-sleeping and out the other side just after xmas, I had to stop because the only way I felt safe was to lie completely still and this gave me shoulder and neck problems.
But he has always hated his cot, he will fall asleep in our arms, and with precise execution when we know he is completely asleep (after he has done his 'quick eyes open to check Mummy is still there' trick after 5 minutes)he still wakes up arms flinging, legs flailing and rubbing his face.
I have been holding out for that miracle nights sleep but it just hasn't happened yet, he is a regular 3 hour guy, with the odd 4 hour thrown in to give some hope. Now we are down to 2 hourly and I am getting a little anxious because I am starting work in 6 weeks and not sure I can function in a working world with this level of sleep. My last bit of hope is that we are going to a wedding in NZ in 2 weeks time, maybe the jetlag will jolt him into a new world of sleeping habits !!! Or more likely I guess will just make things worse for a while for the poor little mite and then back to normal.

hi averagemum,
I find it hard to know whether my DS is hungry or just wants a comfort feed at night, I still BF at night so maybe if I offered a bottle instead it might tell me more. I also feel guilty about his lack of self settling ability but when DS was small his colic and wind was so bad I am sure he must have been in a lot of pain, and to encourage self settling was out of the window, I don't think I would like to be left alone with shooting stomach ache or a belly full of wind blowing me up.

Hey I wouldn't beat yourself up about lack of self-settling, my DD has always been really good at that, especially in the middle of the night but now she has to be cuddled to sleep even in the middle of the night after a tummy full of milk

Hello all, can I join?

my ds is 5 months + 3 days. We have had a horrendous 2 months with 4/5 wake ups between 11pm and 6am most nights. The problem is not really ds waking up to feed, it's other people putting pressure on me to get ds to sleep through - ie dp, dp's sister, nct friends. As a result of all that pressure making me think I was doing stuff wrong, I tried sleep training, shush pat etc etc and it made us both really unhappy (and utterly exhausted) so went back to just feeding ds and dp moved into the spare room.

I think ds has simply been hungry most of the time and I eventually decided if he wants comfort, so what, he's a tiny baby. I'm luckily not going back to work for a while so took the decision just to do less in the day and concentrate on ds. The reason I was getting so upset about the sleeping was my expectations so I adjusted my expectations.

However, things are looking up last 2 nights due to 2 things. Dp now settles ds when he wakes at 9.30pm (ds started waking regularly at this time 3 weeks ago) with dummy and guitar - ds does not associate dp with food and although it takes about 1 hour, he does go off eventually and sleeps through til 1am - that means he's gone 6 hours without food!! Secondly, I realised ds was not warm enough - I took his grobag off 3 nights ago and his body was not toasty so we added a sheepskin to his amby natures nest, put him in a sleepsuit whereas before he was in a footless body thing before, and leave the radiator on at a low setting (he also has 2 blankets on top). I also moved his nest further into the bedroom away from the outside wall. Result was that for the last 2 nights he woke at 1am, I fed him, then he woke around 5am, I put dummy in and he has then woken between 6 and 7am. This is really great progress, we're hoping it continues...

found you! we actually had one three hour stretch last night which was the best night in ages. was so pleased when I saw a "1" on the clock instead of 11 or 12 at the first wake up. not so great after that but hey - its progress...

for us I think it is a combination of hunger, habit and a series of colds - sleep started going wrong about 13 weeks and just coming up to 20 weeks now...

So how was everyone's night? any magical sleep throughs? DS was a complete pain to put down after his evening bath/feed routine, ended up being up for ages and eventually nodding off with more frantic pram rocking. I was convinced he was going to be impossible after his 10:30 feed, but he went down almost instantly and slept 11:30pm-4:00am, a record for recent weeks! So all we have to do is put up with 90 minutes of screaming every evening, and we'll get a 4.5 hour stretch of sleep

Sambo - that's exactly what happened with me and DS. I thought he didn't need the feed so it would give him 'bad habits' to continue.

What a fool I was!

I have no idea what time DD woke up last night as I gave in and latched her on and went to sleep so I think she may have fed all night!!

Unfortunately our long(ish) stretch of sleep seems to be between 5 and 8/9 in the morning. Would be great if DS wasn't an early riser!!

Nope not much sleep here

Hi all, just found this thread! DS is 4 months + 2 days (or 18 weeks tomorrow!) Have been rediscovering co-sleeping as I had had him in a bedside cot so could slide him into bed and back into the cot but he won't do that any more.

One thing which I've found really useful is dressing him in thick fleecy sleepsuits, rather than his usual cotton ones, then he doesn't need a blanket when he is snuggled up to me as he has my body heat as well. I've started wearing long sleeved PJ tops to keep myself warm too.

Our longest stretch of sleep is in the middle of the night, between 2ish and 5ish at the moment. DS also has this annoying habit of pushing himself away from the breast while trying to feed. He's also recently learnt to put his dummy in his mouth by himself (if it is in his hand at the right angle) and so whenever it is in his mouth he grabs at it and pulls it out, then gets upset that he hasn't got it to suck on any more! Also feeding him in a quiet darkened room doesn't seem to help, he keeps coming off the breast anyway, the only way I can keep him interested is to squeeze the breast, I assume this increases the letdown and makes it like a very full breast. They seem to be floppy all night anyway!

I think I will try putting him to bed between 6 and 7 tonight and see if it helps.

about 2 hrs sleep here . DS2 actually slept well from 7pm til about 11pm, up for an hour and then on and off feeding again until 7am. DS1 woke on the hour every hour with his teeth and ended up in bed with us. 4 in a kingsize bed is cosy.

cherychoc - DS2 is the same with feeding. He seems to latch on better when i hold my boob. Dont know if now that my supply has settled down and my boobs arent heaving with milk every hour, he isnt that keen.

i did try him with some cooked carrot sticks last night (we are going to do BLW) but he just turned his nose up. presume by this he has decided he is waiting another 2 1/2 weeks before he will try food.

at least its the weekend so there's no major rush to get up for DH going to work at 7.30am

Hello all! -glad some of you are making progress. We had a really bad one - dd didn't do her usual 3- 4 hour initial stretch -but woke up every HOUR until 3 so I put on an extra blanket and cranked up the heating. We managed to settle her at 4 and that was her until 7.30 (dh got up with her - a wee deal we have on weekends) so i managed to sleep until nine...wowzers! He has now taken her out for a walk so I've had a bath & cut my toenails (OMG - they were horrendous! ) and feel a bit brighter. does anyone else secretly long for weekends so dh/p can help out a little? (I am also experiencing the distraction when feeding thing during the day) - I don't think it's always hunger with my lo at night, tho - except at about 2 or 3 because she is proper gulping it down then CherryChoc I am also going to try an earlier bed time (am half way through the 'no cry sleep solution' and it suggests this). Good luck for tonight everyone ...

Lol daisyblue my DP doesn't help out at weekends either Maybe I ought to suggest he takes him out for a walk one day!

You have reminded me though I need to order NCSS from Amazon, I spend half my time recommending it to everyone and yet I have only read what is on the website!

fts, we are going to do BLW as well. I am almost wishing the next month away so that I can at least start offering him things - in fact I think he would be interested now (because of the dummy thing) but am worried about the open gut thing.

Well my supply has definitely increased, DS just woke after a 3 hour nap and am feeding him now but my other boob is feeling huge and sore! He is sleepy so not distracted either

Not so bad here last night - in bed around 7pm as usual, didn't stir till 10pm when he woke with what I presume was a mixture of teeth and hunger - lots of screaming He ended up too upset to latch on for a bit which is always depressing. Still, I got him on in the end and back in his cot fast asleep by 11pm (I think?). Woke at 3am hungry, back in cot asleep by 3.30am. Woke at 4.30am, shushed to sleep. Woke again at 5.15am so I decided he was probably hungry (and cold) - in with us he came and didn't stir again till 7am (this is good - it's been creeping back to 6am recently )

His cheeks are glowing red today so I guess we'll be worshipping at the Calpol shrine again tonight...poor little guy.

3 hour nap

I know this is selfish, and hope you don't mind, but reading about your nights has made me feel loads better! not that we had a great night: a 3 hour stretch, then dh settled ds with a dummy which I think was a bad idea - he did another 2 hours but at 12.30am was seriously hungry, then through till 3.45am then... that was more or less it. He got another hour or so from 5ish til 6.30ish but I just can't sleep when he comes in with us! Hope everyone sleeps better tonight - thanks so much for starting this thread. Will try my feed feed feed plan + extra blankets plan tonight.

Why do you think the dummy is a bad idea Averagemum?

I don't think so in general, Lollypop, (it's been really great for us, especially to help ds to sleep in his cot), it's just that I've been trying to feed ds at 10ish to encourage a longer stretch after that feed - as otherwise he tends to get all his good sleeping done before 11pm-12am! I think he might have gone longer if he'd fed then rather than dummied (but then again he obviously wasn't ravenous). No, the dummy has definitely helped. Though I do sometimes worry he'll start waking for it every two minutes (have read some scary threads on here).

Lollipop not lolly (sorry).

csws - yes ds2 sleeps his best stretch first of all, usually 8pm til 11 or 12, then he wakes 3 hourly on the dot from then on. However, lst night was not so bad as previous ones (couldn't have been any worse). He slept from 8pm til 11pm and fed, was up for 2 hours but this was because i forgot to give him gripe water so having remembered i'd forgotten at 12.30, he finally got his does then and was off to sleep shortly after having belched several times!! He then slept (god i love him for it!!) til 6am which means i got a 5 hour stetch of sleep for the first time in about 4 weeks!!

lollipop - yes i have one too that thinks he can turn his head whilst still eating - goddamn but it hurts like mad. he also does a nice line in pinching my neck - i have several little bruises which could be mistaked for love bites from a distance

skimty - yes i too am full of guilt for being a snappy, grumpy mum with ds1 (3yo) who does not understand why i am miserable i swear each day i will not take it out on him but my about 5/6pm i am dead on my fieet just as he hits hyper-drive and wants to play etc....i will make it up to him soon

Well you're all going to hate me but I have had 2 fantastic nights! Having read the link about daytime feeds causing bad nights I have really improved the days (have done better sleeps in her cot and very good feeds with less snacking) and then a dream feed at 11 and the past two nights she has slept 11 til 7. I know it's probably a fluke but I don't care, 2 good nights will do me! Don't know if it's also something to do with it but think the weeks of lots of night feeds have really improved my supply (can easily express 5 or 6 ounces of each side) so think I am really filling her up now.

I feel distinctly underqualified to join this thread when I read some of your posts but humour me, I need somewhere to hang out...

DS is 23 weeks and has never slept through. He went through a glorious phase (although I didn't think so at the time) of waking once for a feed at 3 and then back down to 7 but two weeks ago that went out the window and he's now waking about every three hours. I could cope with this if our days hadn't degenerated into something dreadful too.

I think it must be a growth spurt as he is ravenous all the time. And I am wracked with guilt as he has put on no weight in the last three weeks, so now part of me wants him to sleep lots but another part wants him to wake up and feed. Can sympathise with those with sore nipples from pulling babies - I feed DS in an armchair, he is very long and likes to bounce with his feet against the side - ow, ow, ow. My favourite is a lovebite on my upper arm where he was sucking it in the middle of the night and I was too tired to reposition him on the nipple!

The worst is that several of my friends have 10-12 week olds who are all sleeping from 11-7 or 8. I hate them and hate myself for that.

arthymum are you me? Seriously, my DS is 24 weeks tomorrow and could be the same baby you describe. Take heart (although not from my example, last night was a joke and DS has only just nodded off after waking up at 5.30am ).

Morning all

Never got a chance to post on here yesterday ... Night before last not bad - she slept midnight till 4, longest stretch for ages and felt good. Then up a few times after that. Last night she was in bed at midnight, up twice before 1 am, up at 4 when I noticed she had a stinky nappy, then we couldn't get her back down after changing her until she came into our bed around, I don't know, 5 or so, which meant we all slept with me just waking occasionally to flop a nipple in her mouth Think we have feeding lying down sorted now, but I've yet to perfect the Mawbroon Roll

Hopefully I don't feel worse after a good night's sleep yet (as far as I know ) but I do feel bloody awful after daytime naps, so don't bother unless I really need to.

Our naps are hugely variable - sometimes half an hour, sometimes three hours (sorry). This week I've been trying out that theory that they need to sleep two hours after they wake up and it seems to work, except when I miss the window and she's awake forever.

My computer went very odd there ... Also wanted to say congrats anchovies - long may it continue! DD has definitely had less during the day recently (snotty/fussy) so will try tanking her up this evening ...