Getting my 7 and a half month old to sleep through...

[Juicylucytoo]

Right, I haven't had more than 4 hours sleep in one stretch since he was born in June. I excluxively breastfed for 6 months. Then around Christmas I started to introduce Formula. He gets Formula (7oz) at 3pm, 7pm and 11pm. I then breastfeed at 2am, 5/6am, sometimes 9am and then again at Midday.

For about the last 2-3 weeks I've noticed that he is only snacking at his lunchtime and 3pm feeds.

So, I have finally decided to give up the nightime "on demand feeding" thingy (normally 2am-3am) and started last night with only offering water and trying to rock him to sleep.

At 4.15 I gave in and fed him.

Am I doing it right?

Do I perservere to get him on the right sleeping / eating pattern?

Please share any experience / advise.

Feeling like a mean mum by not feeding him, but now extremely knackered

Thanks

Can I join you lovely ladies? DD is 8mo and I haven't had an uninterrupted night's sleep for over a year

I've decided to implement a 'core night' so no feeding before 4:30am to start with and as little intervention as possible if she does wake. Then, I'm planning to start pushing back the time so that hopefully she sleeps through. What do you think to this plan? I'm fed up of her not feeding properly and just wanting comfort as I'm so exhausted. I have decided that it is baby boot camp time. I know that a lot of people say that I'm mean for not letting her comfort suck, but I'm afraid it's time to get a bit selfish. Plus, she I'm fed up of looking at the poor little mite looking tired all day because she thinks night time is play time

Sorry for late update.

Swaliswan - whatever keeps you sane is what is right. There is NO right and wrong. Just what works and what doesn't - for you and yours

As for us:
Last night was 7, then 11.50 (coz I fell asleep ), then 4.15, then awake at 6ish (DH took over), then another feed at 8.

Don't know if that counts as success??

Anyway, lets see how tonight goes... will keep you posted.

Keep us updated TT and S!

jlt, sounds like you are getting there. tt, much sympathy. hope you are surviving duoble chicken pox.

swaliswan, not letting them comfort suck overnight is not mean imo. hope your night went better.

ds has decided to wake overnight for the past few nights in baby sympathy to the others!! sabotage.

OK, don't really know if we're getting there, but I'm not for giving up!

Last night
11pm feed
3am woke and took 4oz of Water (have discovered he will take water from a bottle not a cup in the night)
Woke up about 4 times between then and 4.45, when I gave in and fed him.
Woke at 7am, but didn't feed him (milk) until 11am (He had porridge made with Formula at 9.30)

TT - Double Chicken Pox. Yuk!
S - How was your night?

Miss O - Has your DS gone back to sleeping through or is he still waking in sympathy?

Last night was a bit rubbish compared to how I thought it might go. DD gagged then threw up some of her dinner so I ended up giving her some more food which delayed bedtime until 7:30. She woke at 3:45 and had a cuddle and drink of water. She took a while to settle and then woke up at 5:07 and had a milk feed. I'm not sure if she properly settled or not because I dozed off again until she woke up and filled her nappy just before 6am. She wouldn't settle after DH had changed her and given her a drink as she was up and wanting to play.

I know that the night may not sond bad to some people but I'm fed up that she is still waking up for water and/or a feed 2-4 times a night. If she just woke up for the one feed she has I wouldn't mind but it's the constantly disturbed sleep that is getting to me.

I know that I need to change my tactics to break her habits. I took her to clinic this morning and must have looked rough because one of the Health visiting team's nursery nurses is going to come out and visit us to discuss sleep strategies.

talisman, the constantly broken sleep is really hard. after 3.45 you didn't get an hour of unbroken sleep in a row. am sure some people have it worse, but it doesn't mean it's not hideous. you are allowed to be fed up.

hv took one look at me a while back and did the same in clinic. and that was with my expensive under-eye concealer on!

jlt, only one milk feed overnight! (think i am secretly pollyanna.)

he's still waking in sympathy. monster.

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Hi Firststar - The more the merrier. Together we may hit on a strategy to crack it!

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Nice to here about other mums having similar shockers. my DS is 9 months and wakes up for feeds at least twice every night despite having a sleepy feed at 2230h. Tried doing CC for a few nights about 3 weeks ago and he was going through until 0500h. Then he started teething again and we were back to square one. Trying to gain strength to try again!

This was me a few months ago. My DD was 10-month and I han't slept more than a few hours of uninterrupted sleep. CC wouldn't work (she once cried for 3 and a half hours before falling back to sleep again - with me her room sitting next to her).
My mother works with child-psychiatrists and she mentioned my case. The doctor suggested she came over and took over the night duty for a while. After 3/4 nights, my DD was sleeping through. With no tears involved. My mum would get up and explained an somehow it worked!
I don't know if it would work for every child but just wanted to share my experience.

Breizhette, what exactly did your mum do? Was your DD still feeding in the night until that point and if so BF or FF? I'm trying to work out if I can formulate a plan. Did the psychiatrist explain why it would work?

Good morning, Ladies. I'm hoping that you had a better night than me. DD took half an hour to settle which is most unusual then she woke up at 21:07 I decided to feed her to try and get a good stretch of sleep myself. She didn't feed brilliantly but managed quite a bit of milk. I went to bed hoping that she would sleep through She woke up at 01:38 so I gave her a quick cuddle and drink of water. Then the fun began. Because she didn't settle immediately, DH got in a huge strop with me for leaving DD to cry. He doesn't mind anywhere near as much during the day so I presume he is objecting to the fact that he is having a disrupted night He completely undermined any attempt at CC (although she was more talking/shouting than crying) and picked her up, rocked her, sang to her, talked to her, turned the light on a bit and generally woke her up. No wonder she got really upset. In the end I fed her at 02:40 just to calm her down. The next thing I know, DH has set an alarm for 06:00 which, of course, he is slow to turn off and has to turn on a light to find the off button. Guess who woke up and wouldn't go back to sleep.

I am so tired and angry with DH. If he would just sort out her room then I could do CC which would only take a few nights without intrerupting his sleep. I've tried to explain that although it might sound cruel, DD is crying because she is tired and cries a lot less if she is left to fall asleep rather than being jiggled around and sang to. I've also tried to explain that the reason she is waking up when she isn't hungry is because she thinks she needs to be sung to/stroked/patted/whatever to go back to sleep and that she needs to learn that isn't the case. Oh, and that's the other thing. DH is adamant that DD is waking because she is hungry. I've tried to explain that if she was hungry, she would feed properly. When he starts saying to DD "I know you want mummy-milk but mummy says no" I get a bit cross.

No doubt nursery can further undermine my sleeping strategies for her an let her sleep for ages this morning so that she has a short afternoon sleep and then sleeps shockingly tonight again

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I used to mix feed. So she would have a bottle before bedtime and would have breastfeed to fall asleep. I think she was addicted to sucking for comfort. I also think the CC failed because of the mixed messages my DH and I used to send. I would always end up picking her up at some point which was completely counter-productive. And then breastfeed her back to sleep.

Anyway, the psychiatrist told my mum it was very common. So when my mother was over, we went to sleep in a room at the other side of the house. My mum swears it wasn't traumatic for DD and I do trust her.
For a start I was amazed that she got the baby to sleep so easily (she read a story and then turn the lights off and rocked her a bit and that was it. I kept this routine to this day and it works very well).
Then she says my DD woke up after 12 as usual, so my mum went to see her and explained that she had to sleep etc but did not pick her up. After a while DD went back to sleep. This went on another couple of times.

The night after that, it just happened twice.
The night after, my mum just talked to her through the door.
The night after, she didn't go. DD shouted a bit (it's not really a cry but more of a moan/shout).
And the night after that she slept through!

I thought that when I would take over, it would all start again but it hasn't.
She still does wake about once/twice a week but we now found that it's better not to go otherwise she won't settle again.
I still breadtfeed in the morning, but DD does not look for it at night.

I can totally understand what you are going through as I hadn't had a full night sleep in over 10 months and I was just a zombie.

All I can say is good luck!

Wow, thats really interesting Breizhette.

This was last night for me:

7pm feed.
11pm Dreamfeed
3am Woke - given water. Back and forth trying to shoosh him back to sleep until I gave in at 4.10 and breastfed him. Wouldn't go back to sleep so DH brought him into bed with us.
7am Woke up - Didn't feed him, until porridge at 9.30
11am Breastfed him again.

May try the explanation route tonight, but will continue with the offer of water I think?
Will endeavour NOT to bring him into bed with us tonight.

DS goes to sleep by himself anyway, so I don't have a problem there (generally) and he's just the same now he's in his own cot.

Good luck everyone

Oh Dear, it doesn't seem to be getting any better. I think this may be our fault as we took him out to a friends for dinner, so his routine got a bit scewed.

7.30pm 7oz (at friends)
11.30pm 7oz (at home)
2.30 4oz Water (would probably have taken more)
4.05 Breastfed him
6am shooshed back to sleep.
7am Up and adam

Will continue to post daily update until he goes 11-4/5 (have now resolved myself to maybe only getting 5 straight hours )

How are the rest of you doing?

7

Well, don't really know if we're getting there and think I might be giving in too quickly, but this was last night:

7.00pm 7oz
11.10pm 7oz
3.40 1oz Water
3.50 Couldn't settle him so fed him as he has a stinking cold and I didn't want to make him struggle (don't know if I'm undermining my own mission here ).

He then woke various times for the next hour or so but settled himself.

Finally woke at 7.30am

How is everyone else getting on?

jlt, sounds as if you are getting there.
only one breast feed overnight (excluding the 11 pm one). the "routine" looks loads better than when you started. ot sure what everyone else does, but i'm also softer if ds is poorly. just doesn't seem fair otherwise.

my ds also feeds at 10-11pm. usually takes 6-8 oz. am working on the basis that if it gets him through the night, i'm not stopping it anytime soon!

justa thought, we also have a morning wake up feed. (as in when i declare it morning, not him). usually from 6.30 am onwards. if you're only feeding once overnight, and hopefully not for much longer, it may be worth trying that.

i stress here am the mother of one, and am making it up as i go along, so feel free to differ!

btw, ds still waking overnight, but poorly also so i am letting him off. (soothes quickly with a dummy and a cuddle).

swaliswan, that sounds really frustrating. haven't got any clever advice, but fwiw it sounds like you are doing the right thing to me. could you stress to your nursery you are trying to get her into a routine?

good luck for tonight.

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Firststar - it sounds like you're making great progress.

Last night was 11pm to 4.40 here, then he couldn't settle as his cold was keeping him awake, so tried without success to get him back to sleep. In the end my DH got up with him at 6am and he brought him back to bed at 8am and he slept until 9am.

As his cold is really bothering him I've bought some Medised and given him that at 7pm, so we'll see how it affects the night.

I would like to push out the waking time to at least 5 and then gradually to 6 and then 7am, but not sure if you're supposed to do it gradually or go straight for the 7am. What do you think?

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Sleep has been worse than ever in our household. I'm so exhausted that I'm not going to type for long and I'm going to go and have a nap. To cut a long story short, CC defo does not work for DD to resettle. I hated that thought of using CC to get DD to resettle as I have my reservations about it but tried it out of desperation. Anyway, I now want to try and use 'the no-cry gentle sleep solution' which I shied away from before as I feel too tired to go through a more drawn out process but it seems that this is what I need to do. I hope it doesn't take too long though as I'm supposedly back at work in 4 weeks and I'm a little suspicious that DC2 may have taken up residence.....