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Sleep

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Original poster

Early mornings with my 20 month old

32 replies

bluebell1 · 27/01/2008 12:14

Hi all please can anyone give me any advice on how to get my 20 month old ds2 to lie in.He wakes at 4am every morning and im just so tired that it makes me grumpy and snappy during the day which is no good to my ds's.He has a good bedtime routine(bath,milk and book then bed).He shares a room with ds1 who is a great sleeper but is now getting woken by ds2 as well as have only recently put ds2 in with ds1.Ds 2 also wakes during the night from about 12am onwards.I am at the end of my tether.

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Desiderata · 27/01/2008 12:44

You poor thing! I must admit, 4am is very early. I thought I had it bad with 5.30.

I really have no advice, other than to ask what time he goes to bed?

Original poster

bluebell1 · 27/01/2008 15:30

Hi Desiderata he goes to bed at 7pm.

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MillyMollyAngel · 27/01/2008 15:35

Does you DS2 have any supper, as such before he goes to bed, apart from milk? Had same problem with my DD as she was coming up to 2ys,so started to give her supper as part of bedtime routine, such as Weetabix or small banana with her milk and it worked a treat.

kiera · 27/01/2008 15:36

does he nap in the day at all?

is he walking yet?

getting plenty of fresh air and exercise?

if not, some kids just seem to require less sleep than others...nightmare...

Teuch · 27/01/2008 15:42

I feel your pain . DS got up at 6am for AGES and it crept earlier and earlier.

We started taking him in with us and he would sleep a little longer, but it ended up that we were bringing him through as early as 2am, 3am...

He also completely stopped going down for his day nap without rocking to sleep. I tried putting him down and leaving him, returning every few minutes until he went to sleep...to be honest he raged (not crying, shouting!) for about 2 minutes and I didn't even have to go back in, and that night he didn't call on us . When he woke early the next night/morning, I left him a few minutes and he went back to sleep. (Not so easy when sharing, I know).

I've been there, my mantra is "this too shall pass"

Good Luck!

Original poster

bluebell1 · 27/01/2008 15:45

He has his dinner at 5pm so do you think i should still try an extra snack at bedtime MillyMollyAngel.Kiera he naps at about 11am for an hour as he can barely keep awake in the morning.He is terrible i know he is tired but he fights it.He has been walking since 13months.

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Original poster

bluebell1 · 27/01/2008 15:50

Hi Teuch it is good to know im not the only one that is going/has gone through this.I know it will end eventually but its just so hard i can hardly function in the day.

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Teuch · 27/01/2008 15:50

DS also does the morning nap thing...perhaps it is linked to that, although that wouldn't solve it as mine can't keep awake in the morning either!

MillyMollyAngel · 27/01/2008 15:59

Bluebell, I'd certainly give it a try. My DD would eat dinner 4.30-5pm, and like I said would then have a light supper about 6.30-6.45pm. Would re-iterate what Kiera says though. As we have a dog, my dd used come out walking for 30mins at least, so plenty of exercise and fresh air might help too. Fingers crossed for you.

kiera · 27/01/2008 16:06

are you getting him out of the house plenty in the day to tire him out for bedtime?

his bedtime routine sounds good. and his naptime is not very late. it is so hard when they are resisting it.

my ds2 is 16 months and is a devil for resisiting his naps. this week I have had to take him out in the buggy every day to get him to sleep as he is obviously tired (often asleep within 10 mins of leaving the house) and today I got so frustrated with him it reduced me to tears : ( he has been difficult to settle for naps since he was born, I think he just fights it. he has gone through phases of settling himself OK but at the moment he just doesn't seem able to, left him 45 mins in the cot today and in the end dh had to take him out in the car...

Original poster

bluebell1 · 27/01/2008 16:09

Well we went out to the park around the corner earlier for a while and tonight im going to try the supper thing.

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mummynumnum · 27/01/2008 20:50

My dd woke at 4.30am this morn which was awful even ceebeebies was not on. Thankfully she does not do it all the time and she did have a good nap later, as did i!!!!!

Original poster

bluebell1 · 27/01/2008 20:57

Keira sorry just read your post now.'Today i got so frustrated with him it reduced me to tears'.That struck such a chord with me thats exactly how i feel.Only thing is just lately im so down about everything that im getting angry with the boys and i feel so guilty but i just cant take their fighting etc when im so tired.

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BoysAreLikeDogs · 27/01/2008 21:01

Bluebell, sorry to hear it's so hard at the moment.

I second the 'supper' idea - my boys 8 and 5 still have breakfast at night before teeth and bed, even if we've had late tea.

Good luck

fizzbuzz · 27/01/2008 21:02

I would try slowly pushing his daytime nap later and later, say 5 mins a day, and put him to bed a bit later every night. I say this because ds used to wake at 5:45am every day. He used to go to bed at 6.50pm. I tried putting him to bed later and it didn't seem to work, but in retrospect I should have stuck it out until it did work, because:

Dd goes to bed at 8.00pm, and wakes at about 7.45am

Nappyzone · 27/01/2008 21:11

my little man(14 month) has been getting earlier and earlier also - dont know if it was the right think to do but today at 5.40am i gave him a 6oz feed and he went back off and had to be woke at 8.30 am - he slept 12-2pm this afty and was wrecked come 6.30pm so had an early night - early to bed probs means he will be up with the lark again but i needed my sanity!

Original poster

bluebell1 · 27/01/2008 21:18

Well i did the supperthing tonight so hoping i will get if not a lie in then at least an undisturbed night.just gotoff the phone to my dad and he and others have been telling me i should just go to bed earlier.But its not that simple for one thing im so over tired i take ages to drop off,ds2 wakes up during night as well as early anyway and also as im a single parent the evening is the only time i get me time.Does anyone else find that or am i wrong.

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fizzbuzz · 27/01/2008 21:26

I was a single parent when ds used to get up at 5.45am. I really feel for you, it is very hard.

I used to go to bed at 9.00pm though.....

BirthdayBabe · 27/01/2008 21:32

I would second the idea of giving him a supper. 5pm to 4 am is along stretch for anyone. Or you could give him a bottle when he wakes up and put him back to bed, I can't see anything wrong with that. He probably wakes up because he's hungry.

Teuch · 27/01/2008 22:22

I completely understand your evenings being 'me' time...I hate to 'waste' my time by going to bed, but sometimes it is all you can do!!

Maybe try a couple of early nights to as tackling this is going to need a bit of energy and patience.

Good luck.

ps - the other thing that worked for us, albeit temporarily, was a break in routine when DS stayed over at my Mum's...anywhere he could go for a night?

Original poster

bluebell1 · 28/01/2008 07:17

Morning everyone.I just wanted to thank everyone that posted for all their support and tips.I got woken up this morning at 6am.I gave ds2 supper last night and then when he woke for the first time at 1am i gave him an extra drink of milk and he didnt stir again til 6.I feel so much better already.Hope it lasts.Im going to get an early night tonight though just so i can catch up on all my lost sleep.

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MillyMollyAngel · 28/01/2008 13:39

Bluebell, so glad you got an extra couple of hours sleep- was wondering how you had got on. Hope ds2 will now continue his 'lie-in's' for you !!!

beagle101 · 28/01/2008 14:25

Hi Bluebell - just found this thread - just to say I am in exactly same position as you - dd (3 yrs) and ds (16 mths) share a room and ds seems to follow exactly same pattern as your ds2 (even down to 11 am nap as he is sooo knackered!). I decided something needed to give as I was also just crying during the day so changed things last month and so far ds is now sleeping through to 8am!

I know this isn't the way you are supposed to do it but what I did was give ds an extra bottle when he went to bed (I also now use weetabix as supper whatever I can get down him basically) and then a bottle of watery milk at about 11.30pm-ish (yup also stay up late as when else do you get any time!)before he woke up and I also took him into bed with me (dh banished to the spare room). He slept through until 8.30 and now regularly sleeps through until 8-8.30 which means dd isn't getting woken up and we are all getting sleep.

I have just found that ds can't go 12 hours without something - I have been watering down the milk and when I think he can manage it I will switch to water and the get rid of the feed but heck - we are all happy and for the moment that seems to me to be the best way forward - my HV (who I happened to see the other day) was horrified and told me (and I quote)"ds is just taking the p*" but I think that you have to do what you are comfortable with and what works for you all as a family!

Hope it all works and ds starts sleeping through and staying asleep for you - good on him for this morning

fizzbuzz · 28/01/2008 18:39

Did read on here, that pushing morning nap to afternoon can cure early morning wakening, as morning nap is an "extension" of night time sleep

Original poster

bluebell1 · 28/01/2008 20:24

Hi millymollyangel sad isnt it that i class 6am as a lie in.Beagle101 i think im going to follow your exact routine the only reason i wasnt sure about giving him extra to eat before bed is that he is a bit on the chubby side but then having said that as he is bigger maybe he needs more food.Fizzbuzz only prob i had today is that he wouldnt go down for a nap at all.If he wakes at say 5am what time do you think i should try his nap or would it be better to cut it out?

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