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Original poster

4+ month sleep regression support thread

57 replies

bubblepond · 30/08/2022 14:20

Having just read a 4 month sleep regression thread from 2010 and found it very therapeutic I wondered if anyone fancies joining me for a current thread to help each other through this less than ideal time?!

we actually have a 24 week old (born just at 37 weeks) who since 4 months after her due date exactly has had very disrupted sleep. Combi-fed with 1 bottle per day in the afternoon but otherwise all BFs, previously waking 0-1 times per night since around 12 weeks. I thought we had missed the regression but at 4 months 3 weeks it hit with a vengeance and we are now 4 weeks in!

really really want to avoid controlled crying or sleep training. not looking for advice so much as solidarity if anyone fancies joining!

OP posts:
naomisuissa · 18/09/2022 07:45

Mum2597 · 17/09/2022 18:55

Helpppp!!!!!
first time mum here. Baby is 15 weeks. He got his 12 week injections 1 week ago and ever since he has been SO irritable. I can’t even set him down he screams! He cries hysterically before bed for 1-2 hours then he sleeps for an hour or two before waking and crying hysterically again for another 2-3 hours. He is barley sleeping and his reflux has also gotten worse so he’s not taking as much of his bottles. It’s getting to the point where I am so angry I keep shouting and having to leave him down in his cot and go out the back for air and a deep breath. I am struggling so much he is so difficult I am so so exhausted and I’m struggling to sleep with the anxiety. I really hate being a parent. I know it sounds bad but I am really finding it so hard. Does anyone have any tips for me to soothe my baby? As he cries until he almost bes sick. I’ve tried everything.

Sorry that sounds so so hard. Have you taken him to the doctor? It doesn't sound like usual regression stuff. In the mean time is there anyone who can take over to give you some time off? Will he take a dummy?

ThoughtIKnewBetter · 19/09/2022 20:40

@naomisuissa Nights 3, 4 and 5 were all progressively better with night 5 him hardly crying at bedtime and only waking twice to feed and straight back down! Thought how well is had gone and then low and behold last night he woke up about 5 times crying and taking a good while to go back off and he's done the same this evening so far. I've read that there can be a regression with the method, or an "extinction burst" at around a week so I'm hoping it's that, because otherwise I don't know what else we will do! I always doubt myself thinking maybe he's poorly or teething etc but I don't think he is and he eventually does settle down. I'm going to pray that it gets better in a week's time. If not I have no idea what to do next 😬

ThoughtIKnewBetter · 19/09/2022 20:46

@Mum2597 This sounds horrible and was more or less my life for the first 4 months of my son's life. One of the only things that worked for him at the time was wearing him in a sling. What time is his bedtime? We found that DS just couldn't stand being awake in the evenings, as though he just never wanted to be awake after his last nap, so we soon started putting him to bed nice and early. It helped a little, perhaps you could try shifting it earlier? I'm sorry you're going through this, it is super tough but it will pass, just hang on in there!

Mum2597 · 19/09/2022 21:19

ThoughtIKnewBetter · 19/09/2022 20:46

@Mum2597 This sounds horrible and was more or less my life for the first 4 months of my son's life. One of the only things that worked for him at the time was wearing him in a sling. What time is his bedtime? We found that DS just couldn't stand being awake in the evenings, as though he just never wanted to be awake after his last nap, so we soon started putting him to bed nice and early. It helped a little, perhaps you could try shifting it earlier? I'm sorry you're going through this, it is super tough but it will pass, just hang on in there!

Thank you for your response! It is so awful! Yes I have a sling and wear him in it when he is really unsettled! However he is 16lb and my back is not good after my epidural (emergency c section) so I can only hold him for a few minutes :( his bedtime is currently 8pm/8.30pm! I try my best to stick to this but I’m a first time mum 25 years old I’m still learning and find it super difficult to build a routine! I hope it passes soon i have downloaded the huckleberry app to help sleep train as I’m desperate and will try anything! He woke at 2am last night then 4am 5am 6am 7.30am then 8am :( super exhausted it is mentally draining

naomisuissa · 20/09/2022 10:34

ThoughtIKnewBetter · 19/09/2022 20:40

@naomisuissa Nights 3, 4 and 5 were all progressively better with night 5 him hardly crying at bedtime and only waking twice to feed and straight back down! Thought how well is had gone and then low and behold last night he woke up about 5 times crying and taking a good while to go back off and he's done the same this evening so far. I've read that there can be a regression with the method, or an "extinction burst" at around a week so I'm hoping it's that, because otherwise I don't know what else we will do! I always doubt myself thinking maybe he's poorly or teething etc but I don't think he is and he eventually does settle down. I'm going to pray that it gets better in a week's time. If not I have no idea what to do next 😬

We had regression night 6..I think it is normal (baby is testing whether this is really the new normal). Just be consistent, hopefully tonight should be fine.

TheBestSpoon · 24/09/2022 16:06

Well, we made it back from holiday. Predictably, travel and a travel cot did not improve sleep... Been marginally better since we got back, but his latest trick is to refuse to feed back to sleep in the night and require up to 45 minutes of rocking while intermittently screaming (which is just great with DS1 next door). We've also all had a cold which isn't helping matters. Just praying for a block of more than three hours at some point - I'm at the slightly woozy stage of sleep deprivation...

@ThoughtIKnewBetter glad things are improving for you - I suspect we're going to end up resorting to similar techniques in a few weeks, so good to hear a positive experience.

@Mum2597 that does sound tough. Hopefully it's a phase that'll be over soon.

Hope everyone else is doing ok - solidarity and coffee to all!

ElizainFrz · 25/09/2022 20:13

Ahhh I’m so glad I found this thread: 18 weeks EBF and wakes every two hours on the dot since 11 weeks… he feeds (and has a proper feed) nearly every time so I don’t want to sleep train (he was underweight at birth but has caught up now) but oh my god I really need to sleep. Is he not able to link sleep cycles? Or does he just need to nurse? I let him feed to sleep or cuddle to sleep

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