Naps ruining my life

[CP7766]

Help! My 15 week old is in the early stages of the regression, waking every 30 mins - 1 hour overnight. However a quick feed or rock & she goes back off.

Naps however are a disaster. She has never slept in pram, car seat or feeding in day. Today I bounced in the bouncer for two hours then she eventually cried to sleep for 20 minutes. The next nap I went for a sling walk. 1 hour 35 min walk, no sleep.
I can rock to sleep, it takes about 1 hour and then she can’t be put down. I can’t do anything! I must have spent about 5 hours today trying to get her to sleep at various points. I follow wake windows, have white noise, a dummy for all naps. She needs to learn some independence I think… but how?! Help! I would happily take car pram or sling naps at this point. Once a day rocking and sofa is fine, but I can’t do that 5 times a day else I’d never eat or leave the house.

Go sbout your day with her
Slung or pram
She will nap.or not

@cestlavielife see this is the Mum I wanted to be. Not worry about routines. Easier said than done when she’s screaming though. She has bright red eyes is screaming is so overtired. She was screaming the whole time. I have never driven more than 45 minutes with her but she screamed the whole time with tiredness. She would cry the whole time in the bouncer or pram. She won’t scream if she’s being rocked but it does take at least an hour to get her to nap and nap will last 30 minutes.

Before the regression she did every nap in her stretchy sling which was much easier but she just won’t do that now

You need to establish a feeding and sleep routine, the blissful baby expert is worth her weight in gold!

@AperolWhore vrilliant thank you I’ll have a look. Logically I know she’ll come out of the regression and she has to sleep at some point but we definitely need help!

Get a sling that’s not stretchy to hold her firmly now she is bigger. Those stretchy ones don’t last that long and aren’t giving the firm hold like your arms would when rocking. Get one you can put on after she is asleep so you can rock to sleep then put it on and then it doesn’t matter that she won’t be put down and you can do what you need to do.

forget about things like regressions. Or wonder weeks and all that stuff. The thing that was working and now isn’t - the sling nap- that’s what needs fixing not the baby

it is also OK to go about your day whether she naps or not because at the moment neither of you are getting what you need and if she is not napping anyway then you may as well be getting stuff done. Most of the time there is no choice but for babies to bend round the needs of the adults and family, work etc so don’t feel guilty.

I think your expectations are insane for such a small baby. Google fourth trimester. This is mum life, sorry!
You don't get anything done with newborn.
Contact nap.
Mine did for 7 months.

@PerfectPrepPrincess sorry but i don’t think it’s insane not to spend 5 hours a day rocking your child to sleep. I’ve said I’m happy to use sling, pram, car. She’s also 15 weeks not fourth trimester. I do have to eat, shop, etc. What if I had another child?
im well aware of need for contact, that’s why I baby wore for the first 13 weeks until it stopped working, Co sleep and breastfeed

@HorribleHerstory good point thank you. We have actually recently swapped to an ergo omni 360 so maybe part of the problem is she isn’t used to it. I will keep trying with that.

That's just some babys for you, Shes still very little and regressions happen just stay calm and do whatever works for you for now. Don't obsess over naps or it will just stress you out x

@landonbaby tjats a good point, I think I have been letting it take over. I just feel so guilty when she’s screaming with tiredness and nothing is working and I know she’s not getting the day sleep she needs. But you’re right, it is probably taking over our day more than it should. It’s just very heartbreaking listening to screaming whilst driving or pushing a pram bless her

So she is 3.5 months. That’s really such a little baby. Could she have silent reflux? It can be painful and stop them napping .
It will get better. Occasionally I would use ear plugs to give me a break when I just couldn’t bear it.
Have you tried a dummy? It could be the sucking would help

Does she not drift off to sleep when you feed her? That’s how mine used to nap for the first 4 months or so and I would just have to hold him. Wasn’t ideal with another child but needs must! Then from about 4 or 5 months I managed to get him sleeping in his cot for naps. Just be patient. Throw all expectations out the window. Don’t put pressure on yourself to be a certain mum and don’t compare your baby to others. All those things will make you feel even worse.

@Lavendersummer i don’t think so but it’s a good point. Up until about two weeks ago she napped very easily in the sling or bouncer (although never the pram or car haha) and slept for 3/4 hours at night. I’m sure it’s all linked to the regression, but strangely the nights I can cope with but the naps I find harder!
she does have a dummy yes and loves it:) part of the reason she can’t sleep in a car I think, it falls out and I can’t reach!

Mine was a struggle, didn’t sleep at all unless lying on top of me for 9 months. Still at 2 she wakes several times in the night and insists on coming into bed with us.

I clearly am no in a position to give advice as I haven’t figured it out. However, the weather has been a struggle recently, which made me have disrupted sleep so it may have contributed to the regression.

@Emmacb82 no!! I’ve been fed a lie - I thought all breast fed babies did 😂 I’ve tried going boob to boob to boob when she’s tired… no sleep! Weirdly though night wake ups, She’s asleep before the feed is finished and finishes off in her sleep. So strange. I’d love it if she did feed to sleep!

persevere with the Ergobaby, it might need some adjustments to get right. I understand how you feel with a baby that just won’t stop crying, it breaks you. I had to wear my DD a lot, she got used to the sling and was happy being close.

DS2 is 14m now and to this day will not nap anywhere but his cot. No amount of rocking shushing, swaying, bouncing, whatever would get him to sleep and he hates being cuddled to sleep. Is far happier in his cot in a dark room, and at that age with white noise on. Was VERY restricting but it got him the sleep he desperately needed.

My baby did this when she got to age where everything started to become interesting. Have you tried a pitch black room to get her to sleep for naps?

@Tibtab when she’s not tired (first thing in the morning!) she’s so happy & chatty and lovely bless her which is why it’s so hard to see her grumpier and grumpier as the day goes on at the moment. I’ll keep going with the carrier then and try adjusting it in case she’s not comfy. If I put her in it when she’s not tired she loves it, just cries when she’s tired!

@Milkand2sugarsplease @Hshhshsh No, because she’s always needed so much contact I actually haven’t tried crib, dark room etc. Definitely worth a try!

I'm going through this with my LO , but I've realised I was leaving him an having an hour wake time then starting to rock him to sleep, and it would take an hour to fall asleep, and he was just grump as he still wanted to lay on his mat and try doing stuff, so I put back to 2 hour wake
Time and he drops off really easy, how ever he does have 2 30'min naps and 1 big 2 hour nap, but he's held all through them . With my DS5 nap time, is tablet and colouring time

My suggestion would be to work with the circadian rhythm. Up at 7 (or between 6-8); first nap at least 2h later for 45 mins. Second nap around 12-1 for at least 2h. Third nap 2h later for max 30 min. Bed 2h later (hopefully around 7) Room pitch black. White noise, as loud as a shower. Sing a particular song at each nap. Swaddle /sleep sack. Give her allll the sleep cues.

try side settling: m.youtube.com/watch?v=Ii637ngV_2Q

good luck!

Hi, my baby's 20 weeks so we've just made it through the 16 week sleep regression stage.
I was really worried about how it would go so about week 12 we started to phase out any 'unsustainable' sleep practices - my baby used to only nap on me or in the sling and I knew I couldn't cope with that for another 3 + months so we got him napping in his cot before the sleep regression properly kicked in.
The things that helped us were:
*Love 2 Dream swaddle bags - he slept better with his arms in the hands up position so traditional swaddles didn't work for him. We transitioned to having his arms free after his moro reflex went away and now he sleeps in a normal sleeping bag.
*Pink noise playing on a noise machine.
*Brief nap routine - brought into the bedroom, put into sleeping bag, lights turned off, cuddle for a few mins whilst singing his bedtime lullaby, put down in his cot and leave the room (to watch on the baby monitor).
*Blackout blinds aswell as curtains to make the room super dark.
*consistent start of day at 7am every day and take him outside for a few mins to kick start his body clock.
*Little Ones sleep programme - the wake windows in this are a bit longer than other programmes but they say babies get a lull around 90 mins but if you can nudge them through to 2 hours they will nap for longer.

We made it through the sleep regression in about 10 days and now he naps & night sleeps really well. I'm still following the Little Ones sleep programme as he took to it really well and started falling asleep much quicker & easier than before.

I feel your pain. My 12 week old naps on and off all day and is very clingy. I think at 15 weeks it is still very young to get into a sleep/nap routine. It usually comes easier 6+ months. I don't feel like I get anything done and I have a 20 month old too and it's a nightmare most days. Some days I am winning and get both to sleep on their own and other days I have to sit and cuddle them for an hour. Try not to stress or worry about nap times as such. They usually just nap on and off all day at that age.