Naps ruining my life

[CP7766]

Help! My 15 week old is in the early stages of the regression, waking every 30 mins - 1 hour overnight. However a quick feed or rock & she goes back off.

Naps however are a disaster. She has never slept in pram, car seat or feeding in day. Today I bounced in the bouncer for two hours then she eventually cried to sleep for 20 minutes. The next nap I went for a sling walk. 1 hour 35 min walk, no sleep.
I can rock to sleep, it takes about 1 hour and then she can’t be put down. I can’t do anything! I must have spent about 5 hours today trying to get her to sleep at various points. I follow wake windows, have white noise, a dummy for all naps. She needs to learn some independence I think… but how?! Help! I would happily take car pram or sling naps at this point. Once a day rocking and sofa is fine, but I can’t do that 5 times a day else I’d never eat or leave the house.

Look up ‘justchillmama’ on instagram. Lots of good, practical advice. You’ve correctly identified that she gets more upset because she’s getting so tired, so you need to get in with decent naps in the morning before this starts to happen - this means watch wake windows and starting before she’s too tired. I think she could go about 1 1/2 hours, then down for first nap.
Day to day life doesn’t have to be a constant fight/putting up with upset babies, even though lots of people on mumsnet tell you this. Especially as your little girl is getting older and out of third trimester. Although 4n sleep regression is a pest!
good luck!

Are you sure it's not CMPA? My LO had it and was been similar to your LO as a teeny

Have you tried literally just laying her down on a playmat? I tried everything with one of mine and turns out she actually just wanted to lay down on her own 😂

@Michellexxx great thank you will give all this advice a go!

@Saynotopineappleonpizza2021 i don’t think so, she was completely happy with her sleep up until 2 weeks ago and doesn’t seem to be in any pain after feeding etc. She’s very happy all day, the only time she cries is if she’s tired and can’t fall asleep. How would I know?

@Aworldofmyown to be honest it’s like she wants to be left alone but just can’t quite drop off. So she gets annoyed with touch / rocking / sling etc but alone she gets herself to drowsy then can’t just tip over into sleep so that’s when she starts screaming. She’ll clutch her muslin and suck furiously on her dummy but she just can’t quite do it bless her.

Oh blimey he's much older now so I can't really remember but I remember he had all the signs of silent reflux (I googled "why does my baby not sleep" and silent reflux came up). Turned out it was due to CMPA, he also slept well initially but as he got older it got worse and from 4m was awful until we took him off dairy

My second was just like this, although from day 1. It was torture. It took an age to work out how to help her sleep at all. Have a look at Harvey Karp Baby Bliss. He talks about the 5 S's and the fourth trimester.

I ended up using a wrap sling but she was very specific. She'd only sleep in it if I supported her head to fall asleep and danced to Kenny G. I kid you not. Once she was asleep I could do anything - except leave the house. As soon as I left the house with her in it, she'd wake up! It was a time of my life when I was so miserable as she rarely slept. At 4 months she stopped sleeping properly at night, waking 40 minutes after being put down and then taking 2 hours to get back to sleep. It lasted 2 months. At 6 months we were desperate, moved her into her own room and then she started sleeping straight through! She is now 6 and is furious if I wake her.

I get where you're coming from. Youd forsake the routine, except for the fact that she's miserable so you need to do something. Have you talked to the health visitor? They can be good sometimes.

@MaverickSnoopy that’s completely it!! You’re right. So for instance today I’ve kind of ignored it so far. She woke 7.15 happy. I fed her, got her dressed etc. 8.30 getting tired put her in her cot while to got dressed. 8.45 screaming. Rocked her for 20 mins, no sleep.

I now have to go for an appointment, so in her car seat she goes, still tired. She won’t sleep in the car on the way there, so we’re talking 10am before she even might sleep and that’s if I rock in the waiting room and get long enough. If not, she won’t sleep in the car on the way back either so she’ll have been awake 7-11ish.

you’ve given me hope it might change one day though!

Aw bless her. My advice is to try and stay relaxed and calm (easier said that done I know!), keep the lighting in your house low, back ground white noise. Have you tried her with a comforter? My baby loves muslins as her comforter so every nap I have one and take it away when she’s asleep. Also remember the napping phase won’t last forever so try not to worry about it too much (again easier said than done!) I would recommend contact naps if your not doing them to help relax her and help get her through this phase.

Also if she’s not falling asleep but lying on her back have you tried just placing your hand on her chest / tummy. Babies find this very comforting and relaxing and might help her feel settled enough to sleep

It will absolutely we better one day. It's just the how and when.

When babies go through a developmental leap it can really shake sleep up for a long time and sometimes it takes months to settle. When they become overtired it's so hard for them to know and remember how to get back into the habit of napping. With all of mine I found that when this happened, if I found that one magic thing, then it would be fixed. It's just finding that one magic thing. 🥴

Sometimes I found that it would take 40+ minutes to get them to sleep. If they've forgotten how to get to sleep then it takes so much longer until they get back into the swing of it.

I really do know though, how awful it is. When it got bad I used to cancel all appointments and just spend a week trying to focus on naps and that way there was no time pressure. With my second and third I had to work around the school run so it became harder.