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Sleep

Join our Sleep forum for tips on creating a sleep routine for your baby or toddler. Need more advice on your childs development? Sign up to our Ages and Stages newsletter here.

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Original poster

Sleep training - tell me how's your went.

48 replies

itskc1994 · 19/03/2022 20:32

Hi all.

So I'm officially starting sleep training tomorrow but have the help of a sleep consultant. We will be doing the ferbers method with check ins.

I'm so anxious , my son he is 6 months old and honestly so clingy and grumpy (due to the lack of day time naps).

He currently sleeps most day naps in arms , is breastfeed or rocked to sleep and spends 1/2 the night next to me.

I guess I'm looking from the experienced how long I can expect the crying to last , how severe the crying to get and how long before things got easier.

Look forward to hearing everyone experiences but would love to more so hear from people who thought that it was going to be a nightmare.

OP posts:

RidingMyBike · 27/03/2022 08:36

Well done @itskc1994 you'll get there! It's sometimes two steps forwards, one back but in a generally good direction!

Original poster

itskc1994 · 27/03/2022 09:32

Thanks @RidingMyBike I'm so happy he did so well. And I already feel so much better just having some down time I didn't have before.

OP posts:

shivawn · 27/03/2022 14:48

Congrats @itskc1994, I'm sure you'll see that 45 minutes reduce and a lot less grizziling! It's such a wonderful skill to teach them how to sleep without any help!

Original poster

itskc1994 · 02/04/2022 06:35

Hi all -

Another update , it only got better and better. Self settling way faster , sleeping atleast 7pm-7am. And can lay in cot from 6am - 7am quietly if he wakes up abit earlier. ☺️

We have the odd night when it's a little bit off plan but he still manages to eventually self settle.

OP posts:

RidingMyBike · 02/04/2022 07:36

That's brilliant! Well done. And enjoy the sleep

FourChimneys · 02/04/2022 07:54

It took about a week here, a gradual withdrawal.

DD is now an adult and thinks it is hilarious that she should somehow be damaged by it. As she says, she can't remember it but lots of nice things have happen since.

Good luck OP, it's hard at the time but getting more sleep will be brilliant for you all.

BenjiCat · 02/04/2022 19:44

Can I ask what your /the sleep consultant's approach/method was @itskc1994? Your little one sounds very similar to mine and is the same age. Are they waking up to feed overnight or sleeping straight through 7-7?

WTF475878237NC · 02/04/2022 19:52

Your 6 month old has learned not to bother crying as no one comes. Most people on here who successfully used Ferber had much older infants, not babies only three months out of the fourth trimester.

www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC3422632/ if you're interested in some research

Original poster

itskc1994 · 02/04/2022 20:09

@WTF475878237NC although I appreciate your concerns. It was actually recommend by my doctor. When I had my concerns he actually gave me a lot of research by medical experts and scientists who confirmed the importance of sleep and being able to do so , they need to learn to self settle.

He now on day 7 and falls asleep in 10 minutes , no crying at all very content with his comforter. He Feeds better , he sleeps better , he happier , just in the time he's learnt to self settle he's learnt to roll both ways (wasn't able to before , and to tired to even try) and that's just some of the small changes made.

OP posts:

Original poster

itskc1994 · 02/04/2022 20:10

@WTF475878237NC and also he knows I respond when he calls out. Other then at sleep time I respond to his needs all day.

OP posts:

Original poster

itskc1994 · 02/04/2022 20:14

@BenjiCat

So we went off the temperament of my son. He is very angry and clingy due to lack of sleep.

We worked on a day time routine , solids, bed time routine.

We did ferbers and extended intervals slowly.

There was so much to it but it got easy very fast.

I can go over a much more detailed day and night plan if your keen? Let me
Know I just need to find some time.

OP posts:

BenjiCat · 03/04/2022 09:10

Ooo yes please @itskc1994 if you can PM.

Original poster

itskc1994 · 04/04/2022 08:37

@BenjiCat I can't seem to private message.

I will honestly get onto this for you but I have a toddler who I think may have covid. But definitely some virus so it's been a huge 2 days.

Sorry for the delay.

OP posts:

csectionmumma · 14/04/2022 20:02

@itskc1994 I haven't read replies, but here is my experience:

Did it 1 week before he turned 6 months. Made sure I did it on a Friday night so we had whole weekend ahead of us with no plans (and hubby was around) just incase it was a disaster.

Made sure he wasn't teething and was well. I even took his temperature to be sure he was fine.

1st night was 44 minutes
2nd night was 12 minutes
3rd night was 3 mins with no need to check on him

1st night was hard. I couldn't believe how stressed and loud his cry was. The sound was remarkable.

All worth it though. The next morning he had. I clue about the crying, and he is a very happy baby.

rayray246 · 24/04/2022 18:34

csectionmumma · 14/04/2022 20:02

@itskc1994 I haven't read replies, but here is my experience:

Did it 1 week before he turned 6 months. Made sure I did it on a Friday night so we had whole weekend ahead of us with no plans (and hubby was around) just incase it was a disaster.

Made sure he wasn't teething and was well. I even took his temperature to be sure he was fine.

1st night was 44 minutes
2nd night was 12 minutes
3rd night was 3 mins with no need to check on him

1st night was hard. I couldn't believe how stressed and loud his cry was. The sound was remarkable.

All worth it though. The next morning he had. I clue about the crying, and he is a very happy baby.

Love to know more about this? Was that no milk at all, just sitting by their side until they fall back to sleep?

TheFamousMrEd · 12/05/2022 08:08

I’ve just read through your thread as I’ve been searching for people’s experiences of sleep training.

How is your LO getting on now? I’m nervous to start, but think we need to do it as everyone’s sleep is awful!

Do you apply the same principles overnight as you do at bedtime?

melcalfe · 12/05/2022 09:14

WTF475878237NC · 02/04/2022 19:52

Your 6 month old has learned not to bother crying as no one comes. Most people on here who successfully used Ferber had much older infants, not babies only three months out of the fourth trimester.

www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC3422632/ if you're interested in some research

I work in medical research and this is a poor study. Only 50 mothers? Wow, our sample size is usually in tens of thousands as a minimum. This is not big enough sample to make the study statistically significant.

Also, mothers got paid to participate? Very unethical and makes me question the quality of the study even further.

I would share better research with you but seems like you've already made up your mind.

Allthesweets · 10/02/2023 13:53

Hi @itskc1994 I’ve just been reading your post and wanted to see how things have gone since with your LO? Hoping to sleep train next week, as have hourly wake ups, but feeling anxious about the crying. Thanks

TedTonks · 12/02/2023 19:00

@Allthesweets have you started sleep training? :) I’m also thinking of starting soon!

Allthesweets · 14/02/2023 21:13

@TedTonks Yes, this is the second evening. Last night it took around 45 mins from putting him down to going to sleep. We didn’t let him go longer than 4 mins with a check in to soothe. Tonight it has taken around 30, and again no longer than 4 mins. He went off to sleep on the last check in (hoping that hasn’t negated the learning to self soothe).

For me, the crying is just awful, but he was waking hourly or more and I was not being the best mum I could be for him during the day. I’m really hoping that it gets easier and easier. Fingers crossed.

Are you thinking of the Ferber method?

TedTonks · 15/02/2023 00:05

@Allthesweets thanks for replying! Did you find the checking in actually soothed him/her at all? My baby never seems soothed just by voice/patting so I’m not sure if it would be more for him or me!

did you do the sleep training every time he woke or just at ‘bedtime’? My baby is 5.5 months so he will still need to wake to feed probably twice…

hope you don’t mind all the questions!! It does sound like it’s going well though :)

my baby also wakes every 45-60 minutes which is why I’m thinking of sleep training him - we will all be much happier with some decent Kip! And he has been left to cry before (I.E in the car when there’s no service station for another 20 minutes or when a medical appointment I had took twice as long as expected… or when my MIL refused to return him for a feed!) - none of these times were intentional but there doesn’t seem to have been any lasting damage and I’m sure this sort of stuff happens to all babies at least a few times!!

Allthesweets · 15/02/2023 17:56

Hi, no problem. Yes the checking and soothing did stop him from crying. We only needed to do it at bed time, for his wakes during the night he just went back off to sleep without any fuss. Hurray. We also fed at 1.30 and 4.30 just to be sure he wasn’t hungry. Last night was much better night. He woke at 11 and talked himself back off to sleep.

Also yes same with mine, he has cried for a good 20 mins or more when we needed to come home from my grans in the car seat. There was nothing I could do.

I have had a couple of people suggesting cruelty on my other post. I don’t agree, but I also think that regular check ins help them to know you’re there and also I was so sleep deprived I was not being a good mum during the day and other areas of our lives were suffering.

was last night any better?

TedTonks · 16/02/2023 10:29

Nope! Last night he slept in 45 minute intervals between midnight and 7am again :(

did you wake your baby for his feeds or did you ‘know’ that his wakings were for food?

we’re going to start night weaning him tonight (within reason - he probably still needs 2 feeds) then move him to his own room. If we don’t see a big improvement then we’ll start with the sleep training…

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