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Original poster

My days are wasted because of napping

68 replies

86jabberwocky · 29/09/2020 16:47

DS is 19 months and he typically has his nap between 1pm-3.30pm. This one nap during the middle of the day ruins the whole day for me as he won't nap elsewhere apart from his own bed. I can't go anywhere, I can't plan anything because of this. I have to be at home during that time so he could nap. I feel annoyed because he never sleeps in his pushchair meaning I can never run errands, I always have to prioritise his nap before anything else. He will sleep max 1 hour in his car seat if I drive somewhere far on the motorway but apart from that, nothing replaces his bed. With the days getting shorter now, I'm really feeling down as I can't do anything. Today I left the house at 9am so I could sort some shopping out and grab some lunch with a friend, he didn't nap until I came home at 3pm meaning the final couple of hours was a nightmare as he was screaming and crying because he was so tired and was refusing to sleep in his pushchair. He typically wakes up at 8am and sleeps by 8pm. This time works well for us as DH could get some sleep and I could have time off in the evening.

OP posts:
TooMinty · 29/09/2020 20:42

Does his pushchair recline right back to make him comfy? I also used one of those breathable blackout covers for naps in the pushchair - snooze shade might be the name. And had bear and blankie to cuddle to sleep. Basically made it as much like a nap in the house as I could.

But I'd still take a long nap stuck in the house over an overtired toddler any time!

Marlena1 · 29/09/2020 20:44

All these napping babies at the same time everyday!!!! My DD was a PITA, no idea when she would nap. She's 22 months now and hasn't napped for weeks :( sorry OP though, that does sound like a pain!

Metallicalover · 29/09/2020 20:46

Why don't you get up and ready before him? Then all you need to do is breakfast and get him ready! Do you really need to wait for the poo or could you change him when your out and about? For instance tomorrow morning me and my 14 month old are going out and meeting a friend and her child for a play session 9am-11! (My little one gets up about half 6) She'll have her snack about half 10 as there's a cafe there and then she'll have her nap from about half 11/12. Could be 45 mins, could be 2 hours! I then use that time to prep tea, do a bit of housework etc! She does go to sleep in her pushchair but needs to not have any distractions and needs help to nap.
A lot of baby and toddler groups start at 10am as after that time is when most toddlers have a nap.
I think you need to look at your morning routine.

Bakeachocolatecaketoday · 29/09/2020 20:53

Have you thought of trying to move the day back an hour? So up at 7am, nap from 12-2....bed at 7pm? That used to work quite well for us, and you have a decent portion of the day left in the afternoon if you need to go out...But basically, as others have said, its a bit shit! Flowers All I can say is my younger one was very different and didn't seem to need the same rigid structure, and napped in the pram which was a relief.

eucalyptuss · 29/09/2020 20:54

[quote 86jabberwocky]**@BendingSpoons* the friend we met today doesn't have a kid but my DS gently reminded her why it was a good idea to be child free 😂 When he wakes up in the morning at 8am I normally give him breakfast and then we wait for a number 2 and then I get ready and by the time we are ready, it's 10.30-11am and only gives us a couple of hours before he starts whinging and I have to rush back by 1pm for his nap. Today I thought "f*k it, let him fall asleep in his pushchair" but that didn't go well as he was constantly whinging and crying.[/quote]
What do you mean 'wait for a number 2?'

eucalyptuss · 29/09/2020 20:55

I don't think I would chain myself to the house at the whim of my son's bowels...

FusionChefGeoff · 29/09/2020 21:08

Yup - bag packed, clothes out night before for you both. Up, breakfast, OUT!!

Get jobs / socialising done in the morning then back home for lunch / nap / dinner prep / TV time.

starshearts · 29/09/2020 21:13

@p0ptart I have to lie next to mine too 🤣

Original poster
86jabberwocky · 29/09/2020 21:15

@eucalyptuss he normally goes for a poo in the morning and I don't like changing him in public toilets due to Covid right now. Today again, I said "f**k it" and ended up changing his dirty nappy on the back seat of my car which was painful. Sorry not trying to find any excuses to be more organised or anything. It's just being tied down and I just wished my DS would fall asleep in his pram like some toddlers.

OP posts:
eucalyptuss · 29/09/2020 21:17

Our day generally goes like this:

Up between 7 and 8, normally 7:30.

Breakfast, dress, teeth, loo

Leave the house by about 9. Meet friends around 9:30

Home for 11:30/12 for lunch, tv time, nap time. Get him up at 2 latest (he's 2.5 and slowly dropping naps).

Leave the house again for about 2:30/3 snack on the move. Maybe meet at friend between 3 and 5.

Home anytime between 4-5 depending on what we're doing. If going to a close friend LO will have dinner at their house and we'll be back for bath time at 6:30.

Normally back between 4-5 for dinner at 4:30, play/tv time and then supper at 6, bath at 6:30, books at 6:50 and into bed between 7 and 7:15

Boom. Easy

daisypond · 29/09/2020 21:17

You are waiting too long to leave the house in the morning. Surely most playgroups are from 9. Get out and about earlier and then come back for the post- lunch nap. If you had other children that needed taking to nursery school, you would just be doing it as a matter of course.

eucalyptuss · 29/09/2020 21:19

[quote 86jabberwocky]**@eucalyptuss* he normally goes for a poo in the morning and I don't like changing him in public toilets due to Covid right now. Today again, I said "f*k it" and ended up changing his dirty nappy on the back seat of my car which was painful. Sorry not trying to find any excuses to be more organised or anything. It's just being tied down and I just wished my DS would fall asleep in his pram like some toddlers. [/quote]
Comparison is the thief of joy. I would take a proper routine over a half overtired baby/toddler from a rubbishy pram nap

sar302 · 29/09/2020 21:19

Oh I love the midday nap. DS is nearly three and still does 2 hrs a day. Only in the cot - he's never been a pram sleeper. I put him down and have 2 glorious hours of peace and quiet. A restful lunch, watch Fraiser reruns that are recorded. Do some online shopping / sort the house. It's bliss. I'm going to be so sad when the nap goes 😭 embrace the nap!!

eucalyptuss · 29/09/2020 21:21

Mine are 50/50 maybe even less sure and I miss the proper 2 hours that I used to get!

nicky7654 · 29/09/2020 21:26

Mine napped in their pushchairs if I wasn't at home. I def would never stay indoors just so they could sleep in a cot. Rediculous!!!

eucalyptuss · 29/09/2020 21:29

@nicky7654

Mine napped in their pushchairs if I wasn't at home. I def would never stay indoors just so they could sleep in a cot. Rediculous!!!
*ridiculous

Yeah sod your child's need for proper sleep!

BrutusMcDogface · 29/09/2020 21:33

This is a beautiful time. Enjoy it! It won’t last.

dingledongle · 29/09/2020 21:34

I loved my kids napping at this time I used to relax and watch TV! I always let them nap at home because it felt better for them, I understand it is not for everyone but it will pass and there will be a time when you wish they would sit still, enjoy it Wink

mrsed1987 · 29/09/2020 21:36

My son is 20 months. He naps from anytime from 12pm till about 2.30. I have a number of friends with babies the same age and they all sleep the same time, we just do things in the morning or later afternoon.

My LO doesn't tend to nap in the pram either. I'm just enjoying the fact he naps and I use the time to tidy up or watch something other than peppa bloody pig.

Letmegetthisrightasawoman · 29/09/2020 21:43

I think 8am is quite late for a 19 month old to wake up (nothing wrong with it though), but I would definitely suggest getting out of the house earlier - on work days we're out of the house in an hour. I know how annoying it is to know your child will probably poo when out, but I would focus on finding a public baby change that you feel comfortable using. And/ or bring your own changing mat and antibacterial wipes and a toy so he doesn't touch things. I think your problem really is not getting out until 10.30. We've been known to be in a park 30 minutes away by 9am; tomorrow I'm meeting a friend at that park at 9.30am. I will hopefully manage to spend 1.5 hours there, and then go to the post office, boots and the supermarket before we need to be back for lunch and a nap (and I walk/ bus everywhere). I'm not quite sure how shopping and lunch takes 6 hours? I think the problem isn't your son's naps, it's how you use the time around it - 2.5 hours in the middle of the day doesn't waste an entire day?

TheTeenageYears · 29/09/2020 21:44

DS slept anywhere, DD wouldn't- she once screamed her way around a shopping centre and continued in the car for about 15 minutes until she was so exhausted she had to give in.

Fatted · 29/09/2020 21:44

I'm going to be THAT poster on here.

My eldest was at a childminder from six months old. I have no idea what his napping schedule was this age. My youngest stopped napping at 18 months. I had to take his big brother to nursery in the afternoon and I then had to drive both of them to SIL by 4pm so then I could drive off to work for an evening. I had no other choice than to just drag youngest along naps or not. He had to learn to fit in with every one else's routines and nap in the car or be tired. He chose tired Angry.

You are the parent. Your DC has to learn to adapt to different situations. Alternate afternoons at home where he naps in the cot with afternoons out and he just has to deal with it.

whatswithtodaytoday · 29/09/2020 21:45

Why do you need to feed him at 3pm? Is that a breastfeed or snack? Assuming not boob, stick his food in a bag and give it to him while you're out.

I do think getting him up earlier would help - I know it's painful when he's peacefully asleep, but it would give you so much more time.

The toddlers you see sleeping in their prams are likely not asleep for long - mine would eventually pass out but only for half an hour or so, and then he'd be whingy and overtired the rest of the day - not worth it!

Letmegetthisrightasawoman · 29/09/2020 21:46

@nicky7654

Mine napped in their pushchairs if I wasn't at home. I def would never stay indoors just so they could sleep in a cot. Rediculous!!!
Good for you. The last time my kid slept in his pushchair was in January. Even if he did fall asleep when we're out now, that wouldn't solve anything because we have stairs outside our house so I would then have to spend the entire nap outside, which I don't want to do either. But I'm glad your children aren't as "rediculous" as mineHmm
eucalyptuss · 29/09/2020 21:47

@Fatted

I'm going to be THAT poster on here.

My eldest was at a childminder from six months old. I have no idea what his napping schedule was this age. My youngest stopped napping at 18 months. I had to take his big brother to nursery in the afternoon and I then had to drive both of them to SIL by 4pm so then I could drive off to work for an evening. I had no other choice than to just drag youngest along naps or not. He had to learn to fit in with every one else's routines and nap in the car or be tired. He chose tired Angry.

You are the parent. Your DC has to learn to adapt to different situations. Alternate afternoons at home where he naps in the cot with afternoons out and he just has to deal with it.

A toddler doesn't need to fit in with their parents want to browse shops when developmentally they need naps until at least 2.5.

Dropping naps at 18 months isn't the child's choice, sounds like they've never been given a decent environment or routine to get the sleep they need

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