3 month old wont sleep unless held

[JNewts]

Hi,

I'm looking for some advice as our 3 month old will not sleep without us holding her. We try to put her down in her Snuzpod but after 5-10 minutes shes awake again.
It's got to the point my husband had to leave his job so he can stay awake all night with her asleep on him and then I take over during the day and she naps on me during the daytime.

This just isnt sustainable and we are at a loss of what to do.

When shes held she sleeps well at night usually. Bedtime varies from 9-10pm and she wakes 1-2am for a feed then sleeps until 530. Sometimes she wakes for a 2nd feed around 4am and will sleep until 630.

Any tips or suggestions would be appreciated x

How long did it take before your LO accepted the dummy? I'm wondering whether I should persist with trying to get her to take it?

Definitely keep trying. Definitely.

It took me 7 weeks of relentlessly, constantly trying hard until my youngest child (finally) accepted a dummy. I kept working at it though because I understand the value a dummy brings to independent sleep.

You poor thing this sounds tough. You mention reflux. No hope of sleep training a baby if they genuinely have reflux as she will be waking as she is in pain. Get the reflux under control with the help of the doctors (could be baby onto medication and possibly dairy in your diet for example) and then see where you are with sleep. In the mean time safe cosleeping.

Just seen you have mentioned Gaviscon. Try discussing omnaprozole or ranitidine with the doctors.

Have a look at safe sleeping guidelines. My DD sleeps quite well in her snuzpod but I often bring her into my bed at about 4am so i can feed her and go back to sleep. Shes 14 weeks and I've been doing the same since she was a few weeks old. I tuck the duvet around myself so it cant go over her and sleep with my leg bent at 90 degree and my arm out so I can't roll. People dont tend to roll around that much in their sleep anyway, otherwise you would be constantly rolling out of bed or into your partner.

In terms of habit forming it can be an issue - you probably dont want them sleeping in your bed when they're 2, 3, 4 years old. But even that is a lot more sustainable than your husband staying up until 2am every night and having to leave his job in order to do so. That's probably a worse habit to get into, which you dont want to be doing when they're 2, 3, 4 years old either.

If you think there’s a cows milk issue stop eating it for two weeks and see if there’s an improvement. Do choose a fortified non dairy alternative so you get enough calcium etc.
I used a Moses basket sometimes I would warm the mattress with a hot water bottle other times I would feed him with the mattress under him and put both babyband mattress back in the basket simultaneously.
Will she sleep whilst being pushed out in the pram? It can take a few goes to get them to do this reliably but worth it in the long term. They also sleep better in the fresh air outside. If you don’t want to leave them you can sit by the pram.
Holding them is a lot worse than co sleeping and you can gradually break the cosleeping habit when they are older.
Definitely persist with a dummy. Mine liked the mam ones but you may have to try a few.
Have you tried other places to sleep than the snuzpod? Cot, pram, travel cot, Moses basket, pushchair on a very slight incline obviously the last one for day time naps only.
You have my sympathy as I have a really bad sleeper who’s now 3. But there is a bit of pick your method and persist. Mine was napping in the pram.

My baby is like this, I'm cosleeping. Didn't have the option of husband giving up work and we had to have a way to get sleep, he does nights and long shifts. In terms of feeling confident about cosleeping, perhaps just try lying with her, bf and don't fall asleep, or just doze with your husband watching. I was scared to begin with, but honestly, I've never come anywhere near rolling on her. How often do you accidentally roll out of bed? I assume you dont, even asleep you know where the edge of the bed is and when you are too close, it's the same thing. I'm a bit worried about what the long term options are and that I might end up with a toddler stuck in my bed, but then remind myself that I don't really have much option!